Keep Christ in the Mayan Apocalypse

Too many undiscerning Christians (apparently including the majority of those who live in Russia) have been duped and thus fail to realize that the Mayan prediction of the end of the world on December 21st 2012 is simply another salvo in the war on Christmas. You don’t think the ancient Mayans set the date for the apocalypse so close to the day we celebrate Jesus’ birth just by accident, do you?

The aim is presumably to prevent people from buying present, putting up decorations, or drinking too much, out of concern  either that they will be ill-prepared for the apocalypse, or that their efforts will be wasted.

I therefore call upon all Christians everywhere to not allow this attack on Christmas to set them back. Do your Christmas shopping. Hang decorations. Wish people a Merry Christmas right away – the sooner the better, and definitely before the 21st. Ignore the pagan Mayan calendar, and do not under any circumstances wish someone a “happy apocalypse” or a “merry end of the world.”

Also, recognize that this is not merely an attack on Christmas but an attack on Advent. With all the countdown clocks around the web, people are bound to get confused about which are counting down to Christmas and which are counting down to the end of the world. Make sure you are not led astray! There is only thing that is a more serious attack on Christmas than predicting the world will end just before it, and that is getting your countdowns mixed up and finding yourself celebrating Christmas several days early.

But most importantly, don’t let the sort of Mayan grinchiness reflected in the card below infect your spirit!

[DISCLAIMER: The above post is intended as satire. Anyone suffering from SDDS (Satire-Detector-Deficiency Syndrome) should not read it.]

  • http://nwrickert.wordpress.com/ Neil Rickert

    [DISCLAIMER: The above post is intended as satire. Anyone suffering from SDDS (Satire-Detector-Deficiency Syndrome) should not read it.]

    Now he tells me, after I have already read it!

    Thanks for that post – perhaps the best post I have read all day, and the best ever on the Mayan apocalypse.

  • the apocalyptophiliac

    Love. This.

  • enufistoomuch

    Okay the sarcasm works :o)

    Seriously though, people who believe there is an apocalypse predicted by the Mayans also believe that Hollywood only films Truth.

  • http://bilbos1.blogspot.com/ Bilbo

    Thanks for a good laugh.

  • Mark Hollomon

    Well done.

    This phrase, however needs a bit of editing – it seems to be missing a few words.

    There is only thing that is a more serious attack on Christmas than predicting the world just before it…

    • http://www.patheos.com/blogs/exploringourmatrix/ James F. McGrath

      Thanks – I’ll fix it, as something clearly dropped out or got inadvertently deleted!

  • ROFLMAO

    Yes, because the true meaning of Christmas is the shopping and the decorating.


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