Why My Children Wear Blindfolds in Your Church

Blindfold

The following letter was, to the best of my recollection, sent in anonymously after allegedly being discovered in crumpled pieces behind a church dumpster. Given the magnitude of the problem of immodesty in the church today and the dire straits of this man whose children wear blindfolds in church, I thought it worth sharing here in it's entirety without edits. If you have seen any churches that fit his description, please leave a comment with a click here so the letter can be returned … [Read more...]

Why I Don’t Raise My Hands in Your Church

raised hands in worship service

I know what you’re thinking.If I don’t raise my hands in your church, there’s probably something seriously wrong with the state of my soul. Clearly the Spirit ain’t moving if my hands aren’t lifting, right?OK. So I don’t know what you’re thinking exactly, but after having experienced countless Evangelical worship services and having been harangued by worship leaders to clap more, turn and greet total strangers as if we were long-lost friends, and raise my hands higher (Higher!), I might b … [Read more...]

Why I Left Your Seeker-Friendly Church

iceage_church

It’s not you. It’s me. That’s why I left your seeker-friendly church.At least that’s what I’m telling everyone. Just to be polite.I know I should just be honest, being a Christian and all, but I’d rather not feel like an evangelical outcast if I can help it. It’s bad enough that I haven’t renewed my subscription to Christianity Today (If we could just keep that between us, I’d appreciate it).But truth be told, I just don’t get what this seeker-friendly church stuff is all about. … [Read more...]

Why I’ve Stopped Showing Up on Time at Your Church

Countdown

You may not have noticed, but it seems a lot of people have stopped showing up on time at your church. Maybe you're one of them. Which might explain why you haven't noticed.Noticing that people have stopped showing up on time at church seems to have been what started the, well, I guess you could call it a rant of sorts. It seems some church-going fellow went off  right in the middle of a worship service recently. Stirred things up quite a bit from what I hear. Some conspiracy theorists have … [Read more...]

Why I’ll Never Stop Singing In Your Church

You read that right. I'll never stop singing in your church. Never.I know. Shocker. I'm the guy who wrote Why I've Stopped Singing in Your Church not long ago and stepped unwittingly into what some have called "worship wars."Not my intention. If that's how you look at it, consider this a white flag.I was just voicing frustrations that had been brewing for the last decade or so. It seems as if there are a lot of others who've felt the same way. You might have been one of them. But … [Read more...]

Where Have All the Children Gone in Your Church?

"But where have all the children gone?" The classic film Chitty Chitty Bang Bang portrays the rather bizarre kingdom of Vulgaria in which children have been outlawed, banished to hide underground, separated from the world of the adults. The zany plot describes how sweet treats get offered to entice stray children into captivity.It's weird. It's a bit disturbing.It also describes the worship services of many evangelical churches.Of course, I add the usual caveat, not all of your c … [Read more...]


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