Marry an Atheist or Punch Yourself in the Eye… You Decide.

For many Christians, you’re in for one hell of a time when telling your family and friends your spouse is an atheist. It’s hard enough for atheists to come out to our own parents, but to tell the religious people in your life that you’re going to breed with a heathen, that’s gotta be rough.

(And if any Christians on this site have ever had to do that, I’d *love* to hear the stories. I would ask atheists, too, but I can’t imagine many of us would have the same problem telling the family we’re dating a religious person… personally, mine would be thrilled.)

Anyway, somehow, Kevin (atheist) and Cori (Christian) make it work.

Cori writes about the “White Elephant of Unbelief” she deals with when talking to friends and family:

I have yet to meet a person who speaks comfortably about the whole [religion/non-religion] thing to both of us together or either of us apart. It’s like being married to an alcoholic or a drug addict – we have this ‘secret in our cupboard’, this white elephant in the room, that everyone feels we need to skirt around.

She also talks about the benefits of being with someone who has such a different view on life:

Fact is, I’m crazy about my atheist husband! I love and deeply respect his journey and all the many things he is seeking and finding. I respect so much his integrity, his way of thinking, and his careful and deliberate way of forming ideas. Similarly, he has a deep respect for my faith and would do nothing to hurt or undermine it. We both love the endless conversations we can have around our beliefs, which give us such a richness of insight into paradigms different from our own.

It’s a sweet posting. The comment thread is not too bad, either.

(Via Kevin’s Memoirs of an ex-Christian)

[tags]atheist, atheism, Christian, marry, White Elephant of Unbelief, Memoirs of an ex-Christian[/tags]

  • Frank

    I think it’s much deeper than religious differences. It’s a matter of intellectual compatibility. There are studies that substantiate that there is a strict correlation between religiosity and lower IQ. The higher one’s IQ the less likely he will be impressionable enough to subscribe to religious superstitions. I could never marry anyone who subcsribes to any personal god(s), for the same reason that I couldn’t marry someone who believed in alchemy, astrology, psychics, ghosts, or unicorns, etc. I respect everyone’s right to believe and delude themselves with whatever their superstition is, but that doesn’t mean that I have to actually repect their beliefs. I think that if a non-religious person marrys a religious person then inevitably it will not work out because they both will be operating from opposing belief systems – one based on faith and the other on reality!