Seattle Writers Get Churchified

In Seattle, the alternative newspaper The Stranger sent 31 writers to 31 houses of worship in one day.

Why did they do this?

We are, rather famously, one of the least churched cities in North America. It seems that most of us have better things to do on a Sunday morning than go to church. Seattleites would rather take a hike. Or nurse a hangover. Or fire up the bong.

We’re just not that into Him.

Sending normally unchurched people to random churches… I’ve heard this one before… waitaminute

Copycats, all of them! And it’s not the first time, either.

Dan Savage, I’m watching you. (*evil eye*)

(But if you incorporate my name and the words “Macaca” and “Santorum” in a single sentence– you have my permission to be as creative as you want with that– in a future Savage Love column, all will be forgiven.)

We packed a month’s worth of worship into a single day so that we could report back to you, our readers, about just what the Seventh-day Adventists, the Presbyterians, the Methodists, the Catholics, and the Jesus freaks at Mars Hill are up to. We also snuck into a mosque, a synagogue, and Sea-Tac’s meditation room. We took a look inside their sanctuaries, we took in their sermons, we took Communion, and we took notes.

And some of those notes are admitted pretty funny. My favorite excerpts are below:

At the end, everyone takes Communion, which I am scared to do because I don’t want to accidentally turn Christian…

The good thing about TV church is that you can eat cookies for breakfast during the service. The bad thing is that it’s even more boring than regular church. Without the formality, the little distractions aren’t as funny.

Example: When you’re sitting quietly at church, watching a fly crawl up the back of the bouffant of the lady in front of you is funny. Sitting on the couch in your underwear watching a fly crawl across a TV screen is not so funny.

I’m circling around the gym, trying to find a cute girl I can sit next to. There are none. Seriously, NONE. This is absolutely not the place to pick up chicks.

One blogger noticed the connection to my own story…

Still watching you, Savage.


[tags]atheist, atheism, Seattle, The Stranger, church, Christian, Dan Savage, Macaca, Santorum, Seventh-day Adventist, Presbyterian, Methodist, Catholic, Jesus, Mars Hill[/tags]

  • Jonas G

    Example: When you’re sitting quietly at church, watching a fly crawl up the back of the bouffant of the lady in front of you is funny.

    As it was for me, watching a Wiccan Beltaine celebration, when immediately after casting the circle of protection, when someone in the group sneezed.

  • http://inthenuts.blogspot.com King Aardvark

    No cute girls at the service? Must be the wrong church. I’ve seen lots of good looking girls dressing provocatively at the church my wife drags me to. Many (most?) young religious people I know of think that church is a great place to pick up.

  • Logos

    ain’t that kinda sinful


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