Jeff’s 12 Page Bible

This Week, Lets Try A Reading From The Bible I Wrote

The Onion

This Week, Let’s Try A Reading From The Bible I Wrote

Excuse me, Reverend Dave? Before we begin, I’d like to make a small suggestion. Now, I know we’re all anxious to find out what happens to Issac,…

My favorite part:

That’s why I set aside a good portion of last weekend and wrote an alternative Bible. I call it “Jeff’s Bible,” after me, Jeff Glisson, but I’m still open to suggestions on that one.

I’ve made copies for you all to look at, so if you’ll please pass them down. Some of them got stapled weird, so make sure you have all 12 pages.



[tags]atheist, atheism, Bible, The Onion[/tags]

"I'm using the terms as they are best understood in philosophy of science. Creationists typically ..."

Evolution is Being Watered Down in ..."
"With the Inverse Law of Ninjas, sending 100 of them isn't really a big threat."

Televangelist Jim Bakker Claims 100 Hitmen ..."
"I'm not positive that the assassination of Trump would be the best example of Christian ..."

Televangelist Jim Bakker Claims 100 Hitmen ..."

Browse Our Archives

Follow Us!


What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • Lee

    Just one of the many reasons I love The Onion

  • Kilty Monroe

    Haha!

    Fun fact: Thomas Jefferson did the same thing, clipping out all references to miracles, angels, the Trinity, the divinity of Jesus, and the resurrection.