Thanks for the Great Week, God!

From The Onion:

The Onion

Churchgoer Tips God For Excellent Week

CHARLESTON, SC—Churchgoer Brad Thaden, 48, reportedly tipped God a little something extra Sunday, claiming that the Almighty had done a better job than usual that week, especially with the weather and his children’s behavior.

“Hey Big Guy, here’s a five-spot for ya,” Thaden silently prayed while placing the bill in the church collection plate. “If you keep it up, and make sure Mom doesn’t have one of her spells at dinner on Wednesday, there’s more where that came from.”

According to God, five dollars is “basically nothing” after He tips out the the priest, the pope, the altar boys, and the Holy Spirit.

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