Kathy Griffin Should Thank Jesus for Her Emmy

A couple days ago, Kathy Griffin was making headlines for the acceptance speech she gave when she won a Creative Arts Emmy:

Can you believe this shit? I guess hell froze over… A lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus. So, all I can say is, “Suck it, Jesus.” This award is my God now.

But over at FOXNews, Lauren Green says Kathy Griffin was wrong:

I don’t know what went through her mind and why she would think that was cutting edge or even funny. But first, I want to actually show you that, in fact, Kathy Griffin is wrong. Jesus had everything to do with her winning that award. And here’s the reasoning.

Yes. Yes he did. Here is why:

Jesus died on a cross 2,000 years ago. His dying words were, “Forgive them Father for they know not what they do.” He died and they buried him in a rock cut tomb. Three days later, as the Bible says, he rose from the dead. That day is what Christians celebrate as Easter.

If only Kathy Griffin had known that!

You can guess where Green goes from there…

Here’s the conclusion:

So, you see, Kathy Griffin, Jesus has everything to do with you winning that award. You live in a free country where your abilities can be recognized if you’re willing to work hard enough. That’s at least the dream of America. If you’d been born in many other parts of the world, your daily activity might involve seeking out a way to survive, or even trying to avoid persecution and death. Luxuries like pursuing a career in the entertainment industry would never have been realized; luxuries like being able to insult the founder of a religion of forgiveness and acceptance would not have been possible.

Kathy Griffin, just because you “can” say something, doesn’t mean you “should.” When you say “suck it, Jesus,” you didn’t just insult Christianity … you insulted the very reason you’ve prospered.

According to See For Yourself:

If Jesus really did have everything to do with Kathy Griffin’s award, and [I] think Lauren Green has undoubtedly shown that to be true, then that means Jesus had everything to do with Kathy Griffin saying “Suck it Jesus! This award is my God now!” And since Lauren Green makes it clear that she finds self-effacing humor to be amusing, why is it that Lauren Green is unamused by Kathy Griffin’s remarks, which is essentially Jesus’ own self-effacement?

Ouch. My head hurts now.

(via See For Yourself)


[tags]atheist, atheism, Jesus, Christianity, Catholic League, William Donohue[/tags]

  • PrimateIR

    Lauren Green

    So, you see, Kathy Griffin, Jesus has everything to do with you winning that award. You live in a free country where your abilities can be recognized if you’re willing to work hard enough. That’s at least the dream of America.

    Wait….so after he became a zombie, Jesus fought in the American Revolution. THAT DUDE ROCKS.

  • PrimateIR

    Blogs that don’t permit comments, like Lauren Greens, make baby jesus cry.

  • http://themousesnest.blogspot.com Mouse

    Things I learned from Lauren Green:
    1. Jesus spoke English (“Forgive them Father…).
    2. “Emperor Constantine” became a Christian 6 years before he was proclaimed emperor and 13 years before he issued the Edict of Milan.
    3. Jesus = Bible, therefore mention of the Bible in the founding documents of the US = Jesus. Even that whole Old-Testament-before-Jesus-was-born bit.

    My head is spinning.

  • http://agnosisskeptikos.wordpress.com agnosis

    I do grow weary of hearing the constant argument that everything happens because of the will of God/Jesus. I think what’s so frustrating about it for me is the fact that Christians are completely blind to the fact that it holds no way. In Lauren’s case here, it’s a blind leap to go from Jesus on the cross to Kathy’s award, especially given the way Lauren presented her argument. Argument A does not even come close to leading to Conclusion B. As you said, that kind of ‘logic’ makes my head hurt.

  • http://groundedinreality.blogspot.com Bruce

    If you’d been born in many other parts of the world, your daily activity might involve seeking out a way to survive, or even trying to avoid persecution and death. Luxuries like pursuing a career in the entertainment industry would never have been realized; luxuries like being able to insult the founder of a religion of forgiveness and acceptance would not have been possible.

    So it sounds like Lauren is admitting that religious belief has almost everything to do with where you were born and raised. So Jesus/God allows billions of people to be born and raised as non-Christians just so they can have the pleasure of torturing them for eternity??? I agree with Kathy. Jesus can suck it.

  • Polly

    Apart from the greater issue here, which is…well, I really dunno…I just thought I’d mention that Kathy Griffin sucks. As far as I can tell she has no talent and I’ve never so much as chuckled at her so-called comedy.

    Lauren’s right you know:
    Jesus also invented CPR and LASIK as is clearly evidenced in the B-I-B-L-E – Ref. Lazarus and various blind men. Not content to rest on his laurels, he then went on to incoprate his personal vertical liftoff technology into a new type of fighter jet, the Harrier.
    He is currently working on a more potent form of saltpeter to keep all those young boys from lusting. So, as you can see, many of the wonderful things we enjoy today have their origins in JC’s innovative spirit – a spirit if I may remind you that is in no way bound to his phyisical form but floats freely through the ether everywhere. You may recognize this – it’s the basis of our wireless technologies. So, thank the good lord for all that he’s given us, you heathens!

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com/ olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    Wasn’t aware of her existence before this incidence, looked at her stuff. I think she should thank the obvious lack of competition. The comics today make Joey Bishop look like W. C. Fields.

    The next time she might thank Wm. Donohue. I don’t think anyone in the entertainment industry has ever been hurt by him spouting off about them.

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com/ olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    Just noticed the side bar, “One way to rebut Christopher Hitchens” Having seen too much of his butt this week at Vanity Fair, he really is in need of rebutting.

  • HappyNat

    Just noticed the side bar, “One way to rebut Christopher Hitchens” Having seen too much of his butt this week at Vanity Fair, he really is in need of rebutting.

    That’s not the side bar those are the voices in your head. The ones that keep telling you to bash Hitchens/Harris/Dawkins/”the atheist bloggers” even if it is completely off topic. Have you ever thought of seeing a psychologist? They really may be able to help you with your obsession.

  • Jen

    I am pretty sure Kathy, whose real name is “Kathleen Mary” knows the story of Jesus.

    Jesus, can you stop focusing on getting Kathy her Emmy and go fix things in Darfur? Thanks!

  • http://george1001.livejournal.com/ George

    Her argument is an amazing non sequitur; her idea of cause and effect is ridiculous.
    From the article:

    Ninety-four percent of America’s founding era documents mention the Bible; 34 percent quote the Bible directly.

    This is nonsense. Apparently the 34% is just another revisionist notion spread by the “America is a Christian Country” people. This article from Talk2action.org explains the origins; it’s a Misrepresentation of a 1984 study published in The American Political Science Review.

    (I found this via the Randi.org discussion boards)

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com/ olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    That’s not the side bar those are the voices in your head.

    Were that it was just voices. Jeesh! Happy. If you paid more attention to what was going on with your heroes you’d see it was a joke.

  • HappyNat

    Were that it was just voices. Jeesh! Happy. If you paid more attention to what was going on with your heroes you’d see it was a joke

    I know it was a joke. One that you have mentioned in comment after comment. after comment, just because you keep repeating it doesn’t make it funny or mean we care.

    My heros? It’s not that they are my heros it’s that you bashing them in every thread (even if the thread has nothing to do with them) has gotten very tired. Do you actually like anybody? I don’t have any heros . . . except Wonder Woman and I think that has more to do with her outfit.

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com/ olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    Go figure again, Happy. I’ve been a critic of Christopher Hitchens for twenty years before you ever even heard of him and Dawkins for thirty-one. Before they became neo-atheist pin-ups, before a lot of you were born. Catholics don’t treat the pope as being as sacrosanct as you guys regard your heroes as being. Anyone could be forgiven for suspecting that you’re kind of insecure about their ability to stand up to rigorous investigation.

  • http://badidea.wordpress.com/ Bad

    If you paid more attention to what was going on with your heroes you’d see it was a joke.

    And…… this is non-sequitur #2. Congrats.

    Go for 3 in one thread man, I believe in you.

  • grazatt

    Just noticed the side bar, “One way to rebut Christopher Hitchens” Having seen too much of his butt this week at Vanity Fair, he really is in need of rebutting.
    If that is the case then what he needs is debutting

  • http://thinktoomuch.net/ Hugo

    It’s true though, she should thank Jesus. And she should thank Socrates and Plato. And Luther. And Newton, Galileo, Hippocrates, Bell, Columbus, Voltaire, previous presidents of the US, the monarchy of England, and the Romans. She should thank John Locke, Rousseau, Da Vinci, Michaelangelo, Adam Smith… also, John Smith, John Doe, Emily Green, and every other person that lived before her in a way that could indirectly have impacted her life… The only people she does not have to thank, is those that are not yet born (though, if she has hopes for the future of mankind, and those hopes inspire her, she should thank them as well).

  • Claire

    Were that it was just voices. Jeesh! Happy. If you paid more attention to what was going on with your heroes you’d see it was a joke.

    For that we would need to believe you had a sense of humor, and I’m not into believing impossible things. No, not a joke at all, just your way of switching the topic, as always, to what YOU want to talk about, because if we’re not talking about YOU and what YOU want to talk about, then clearly we just aren’t having any kind of rational discussion.

  • Mriana

    Oh brother! :roll: This is unbeliebable. Why don’t they just take their Bibles and thunk her over the head with it? Who are they to say she is wrong? :mad:

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    Claire, then you looked at the photo of Hitchens in the shower and kept a straight face? Kinky.

  • Karen

    I just thought I’d mention that Kathy Griffin sucks. As far as I can tell she has no talent and I’ve never so much as chuckled at her so-called comedy.

    To each her own, Polly. She’s very trashy, but I often find her funny, at least superficially. She has a routine about Catholics and cursing that is hilarious.

  • Pingback: Friendly Atheist » “Suck It, Jesus” Censored

  • Claire

    Claire, then you looked at the photo of Hitchens in the shower and kept a straight face?

    Yes, I did, it was the mud mask photo that cracked me up.

    Then I read the article. I had never read anything by him before, that is one funny guy.

    Still doesn’t make it a joke on your part, just you changing the topic again.

    To actually get back on topic, I admire Kathy’s gutsiness, if not her comedy. What a shame they censored it, and how great is it that you can find it intact on YouTube.

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com/ olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    Claire, and they say I’m abusive. Since the joke I made was about seeing too much of Hitchens’ butt and his need for rebuttal, to which grazatt got in a good rejoinder, I was on topic, it was you who was changing it.

    You know, you guys, coming up with a pat response like “strawman” or “changing the topic” looks really stupid to anyone who can follow an argument when it’s not true. Those are high school debating tactics. Or they used to be. By the way, you never read Hitchens before? Not something that surprises me, excuse me for saying so but as someone who read just about every one of his two decades of columns in The Nation I think I’ve got a bit more to go on, Hitchenswise, than a bunch of PR addled neophytes who aren’t familiar with his decades of being a real, backstabbing, two-faced, piece of slime.

    Kathy Griffin gutsy? Oh, yeah. Her saying stupid things like this to try to fuel her career as a “comic” takes so much courage. Makes those theists crossing the Edmund Pettis Bridge look like a bunch of whusses.

  • Claire

    I was on topic, it was you who was changing it.

    Nope, no one mentioned Hitchens at all under this topic until you brought him up, not one single mention before yours. You did indeed change the topic, since Hitchens is all you ever want to discuss. And the reason it’s a high school debating tactic is because it’s basic and fundamental to any reasoned discourse.

    I’m glad you feel you are such a Hitchens authority, I’m sure that thought, your teddy bear, and your thumb help you get to sleep at night, but it has no bearing on Kathy Griffin.

    But since, as you prove repeatedly, every column has to be about you and your favorite topic, let’s just make you happy. It’s all about you now. You and Hitchens. Just you and Hitchens, now and forever.

  • http://olvlzl.blogspot.com/ olvlzl, no ism, no ist

    Claire, since the topic of the thread was an alleged comic, who is about as funny as Andrew Dice Clay, and I noticed Hemant’s sidebar about rebutting Hitchens I thought to make a topical joke. But I guess you would have had to know something about what the Hitch is up to to get it. Since Hitchens is a new discovery for you, you wouldn’t have gotten the joke.

    I suppose if I was the brilliantly funny and “gutsy” Griffin I’d say something like “suck it” right now, just to uphold your standards of humor. Come to think of it, that’s about the level of the Hitchens wit too, these drink soaked days.

  • http://badidea.wordpress.com Bad

    You know, you guys, coming up with a pat response like “strawman” or “changing the topic” looks really stupid to anyone who can follow an argument when it’s not true

    The sidebar is on every page: it’s not on topic on every single comment thread. And you are trolling, not joking.

    None of this is about “debating tactics” it’s about your behavior. You aren’t offering anything to debate, you are just being annoying.

  • Pingback: Friendly Atheist » Kathy Griffin on Larry King (with Uncensored Clip)

  • GoDamn

    Jesus had better not nake any plans to visit all those other countries to spread his word. Theres gonna be a mighty pissed off bunch of women wantimg to know why Jesus didn’t let them have a career as a comic in the US and instead made them live in poverty and under persecution.

  • Luke

    I kinda ENJOY all of these responces, The END of religion is the beginning of Epirical Rational Understanding, and if Kathy Griffin has got all you to begin a discussion on the subject Thats GREAT.


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