So many one-liners with this story… where do you start?
Two atheists got caught engaging in oraltastic acts in a place of worship:
Authorities were alerted after a parishoner heard “rustling and groaning” coming from inside the confession box and pulled back the curtains to reveal a goth-rock couple engaged in oral sex, ANSA said.
The agency said the pair — a 31-year-old laborer and a 32-year-old teacher — defended their conduct saying: “We are atheists and for us, having sex in church is like doing it any other place.”
However, Bishop Antonio Lanfranchi of Cesena-Sarsina took said the couple’s behavior was “an outrage of notable proportions which bespeaks unutterable squalor.”
Of course it’s outrageous.
How dare this couple be approximately the same age and engage in consensual, heterosexual sex?
That is *so* not allowed in the Catholic Church…
And they’re getting prosecuted?!
Maybe someone should treat them as if they were priests and just relocate the couple to a different church…
Yes, they screwed up.
Not because they did it in a church.
But because they got caught.
If you’re going to get it on in a place that’s not your own, you need to take all the proper precautions so that no one else finds out.
And what’s with the lame excuse? “”We are atheists and for us, having sex in church is like doing it any other place”???
No it’s not. It’s completely different. It’s a taboo. It’s more of a thrill. Having sex in church (oral or otherwise) is possibly the ultimate way of telling God to suck it.
So, what will the Church do now?
[Lanfranchi] added that a special ceremony would be held to purify the confession box.
Oh, no need. That box has already been christened.
The NoGodBlog is encouraging more of this and it doesn’t sound like a simple joke…:
The NoGodBlog supports healthy safe sex between consenting adults. Since the churches don’t pay taxes they are not really “private property”, so at least they can provide a space for this to occur, and perhaps a clean restroom.
I say: Go have sex in a church of your choice — but this time use a condom! Perhaps it would be funny if we all went to confessional just to leave condoms in the booth.
I disagree completely and I’m not condoning this couple’s actions.
You shouldn’t do it in a church.
Not because it’s a “place of God” but because it’s not your own personal space. At the very least, there’s a perfectly good parking lot outside and I’m sure you have a car.
And, really, do you know the types of things that go on in that Confession Box?!
I do like Dave Silverman’s post headline, though…