*moans*

I for one cannot be so easily fooled. In the absence of any actual evidence, I am completely skeptical about the existence of your iGod. Your story about “finding” it on your doorstep is an interesting anecdote (reminiscent of Joseph Smith and his golden plates), but as we know, anecdotes are not evidence. As for the character known as “Bjorn” (a name worthy of L. Ron Hubbard), you offer no more evidence for his existence than you do for iGod.

Your photos are nice, but they hardly provide the kind of evidence reason would require. You’re going to have to do a lot better than this.

For the moment, I remain an i-Theist.

1 – The instruments of death series – in addition to the cross-shaped iGod, there is the iChair (runs on a car battery), the iLethalInjection (with real shoot-up action), the iFiringSquad (put in eight songs, but only one of them will actually play), and of course the iHangman (wear it around your neck).

2 – The iconic religious symbols series – in addition to the cross-shaped iGod, we have the iGoldPlates (which much be returned within one year of purchase), the iHijab (nothing other than the screen can ever be shown in public), and the iSpaghettiMonster (with authentic garlic bread carrying case and realistic flying action).

Any case, if I were to win the iGod, I pledge to mock it as an example of where Christianity acts like a brand, instead of a sacrificial way of life that makes the world a better place. Thanks, Hemant.

Having said that, I think actively supporting the idea of, say, using it as a dildo or “desecrating” it in other ways is completely counter to what this site is about. I was really surprised to read some of the comments on this entry.

The cross as a Christian symbol is something I’ve always felt weird about (given that so many people besides the historical Jesus were crucified for all sorts of reasons, many of them having nothing to do with religion), but I don’t see why you guys would want to set out to put particularly offensive-to-Christians music on it or shove it into bodily orifices. That seems a) immature, b) insensitive, to say the least, and c) like it serves absolutely no purpose except to amuse the atheists here who are the least “friendly” and the most alienating and mean.

It’s not like it’s a “God hates fags” mp3 player. Would we be talking this way if the symbol involved was a star of David? Or a Wiccan or Hindu symbol? I understand the anger about what certain Christian influences have done in politics and education. I know what it’s like to be afraid to come out and to face idiots. But I don’t see the connection between an mp3 player shaped like a cross and any of that. Once again, it’s unfair lumping. Sure, the thing might be tacky or over-the-top. But I think the reactions about are mostly tacky and WAY over-the-top.

Before I read the comments, I was going to suggest that the “contest” could involve nominating a theist or atheist friend who’s helping to advance understanding and tolerance between religious (or religious and non-religious) populations. I was thinking we could all write about friends who might appreciate the humor but who also have done some work towards healing strained or hostile relationships between different ideological groups, and the winner’s nominee could get the iGod and the nominator could get a bracelet or something.

But I don’t know if people would be interested in that kind of contest.

“I” and “God” are diametrically opposed. It is supposed to be all about “God” and denying the “I”.

But Jeff, the “i” is a lowercase I, or a “little I”. Little i, big God. It’s perfectly Christian.