Eastboro Baptist Church is Sneaking Up On Us

Here I’ve been thinking that Fred PhelpsWestboro Baptist Church was the epitome of evilness.

I’ve completely ignored the horror that is Eastboro Baptist Church.

It’s headed by the aptly-name Ben Bigots.

He and Fred Phelps of the Westboro Baptist Church were both members of the local Boy Scout troop. There they were raped repeatedly by several other scouts and the scout master throughout their ten years of membership. This laid the foundation for what would later become their rampant homophobia.

Ben attended Meridian High with Fred Phelps and graduated at age 16 with much higher academic honors than him, including: American Legion Citizenship Award, track letter, Bausch-Lomb Science Award, Eagle Scout, and Principal Appointment to East Point Military Academy. The summer following graduation, he had a profound religious experience, in which he and Fred Phelps were both urinated on by a gay lion at the Meridian Zoo.

Such a traumatic childhood…

Where will his church picket next?

Antarctica:

We will be protesting the march of the Godless penguins. Recently penguins have been using the world’s media outlets in order to spread their filthy lies. Just look at one of the most popular movies at the box office recently, “Happy Feet“. Blasphemous penguin propaganda which the wicked sinners of America devour like the heathens they are. And who could forget 2005’s “March of the Penguins”? The only place penguins are marching is straight to the fires of Hell! Thus we are going to warn them of their sin, so that they might turn away from the Devil and march toward the Hatred of the Lord.

By the way, I also enjoyed clicking on the “Looking for… heaven?” link on the home page :)

(via Cynical-C Blog)


[tags]atheist, atheism[/tags]

  • Allytude

    This made my day

    I loved the heaven link, also the abbreviations- AP( for Mahatma Gandhi etc)

  • http://amiable-atheist.blogspot.com amiable

    countdown to “you do know this site is a hoax, right?” comment

  • http://endcycle.blogspot.com jeremy

    I always have a problem where I wonder, every time I see a quote or action, if Fred Phelps is from the Landover Baptist Church or not.

  • Susan

    in which he and Fred Phelps were both urinated on by a gay lion at the Meridian Zoo. Too bad the lion didn’t continue on, as in the good old days, and eat Fred and friend.

  • http://alcaritown.myminicity.com/ Sanity

    Oh, I’ve had so much fun with fundies agreeing to that site, which is actually pretty sad, now that I think about it.

    It’s Poe’s law In Action

  • jim

    is it a hoax?

    I hope so

    I could see the western not being a hoax, and then the eastern deff being a hoax.

  • http://religiouscomics.net Jeff

    Eastboro… very funny.

  • Nate Phelps

    A great bit of humor…I loved the website. An interesting side note, my father actually began his reign of terror in Topeka as a guest pastor at…you guessed it…Eastboro Baptist Church in Topeka. It was that church that made all the arrangements to open their sister church, Westboro Baptist after my father agreed to stay on as the new pastor of that church.

    Strange but true…

  • http://micketymoc.bluechronicles.net/ micketymoc

    Hello, Nate! I first read your story in that article by Jon Bell.

    What’s going to happen when your Dad passes on? Do you think the Church will go on without him, or is he the only thing holding the whole enterprise together?

  • Nate Phelps

    It’s an interesting question. One that I think weighed heavily on HarperCollin’s decision to let my book pass. I have watched several programs and keep a constant update on my family’s activities. It’s interesting to see which of the siblings have risen to the top of the heap, and how closely they emulate my father in word and tone.

    Ultimately I think the staying power lies in my father’s bottomless well of antipathy for the whole of humanity. I don’t imagine there is any one of my brothers or sisters who can conjure that amount of cruelty without a touchstone like the old man available.

  • http://religiouscomics.net Jeff

    Nate,

    I do have to say that from an atheist perspective, much of the content on your estranged family’s websites is over-the-top funny after you get over the anti-gay rhetoric. I couldn’t imaging making a more effective parody of homo-phobic Christians. Do they even realize how they come across to most people and that their activities actually run counter to their cause (misguided as it is)?


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