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Cectic retells the famous joke:
(If you have no idea what the referenced joke is, here you go.)
[tags]atheist, atheism, Flying Spaghetti Monster[/tags]
But the Flying Spaghetti Monster is my god.
My god is a tasty god.
The original joke is pretty offensive to anyone with acquaintances who died in floods. They didn’t get opportunities to be saved– subtle ones or not.
So many turn their backs on the loving outstretched appendages of the merciful FSM only to their ruin. tsk tsk. This is a lesson for us all.
How many of those who were saved by boat or helicopter then went on to thank their god or say that they prayed for rescue?
Martin Sheen as Jed Bartlet repeated this joke as a parable in one of the earlier episodes of the West Wing, “Take This Sabbath Day”.
First thing that came to mind reading the comic
The alternate ending to this joke, the way I first heard it, was the guy “supposedly” went to heaven and asked God why S/He didn’t save him. God’s reply was, “I sent you 2 boats and an helicopter, why didn’t you take my offer?”
Hmmm…sounds like a lesson in taking action for yourself, instead of waiting on a “deity” to literally pick you up out of your “figurative” flood.
The original joke serves believers because it supports the idea that God works through means indistinguishable from human actions, in other words, believers can still believe God came to the rescue without evidence of this. Instead of scoffing at such a believer as depicted in the cartoon, I should think that they would be regarded as examples of great faith.
Why is it that most of the believers think most people will end up in hell but all the jokes are about those who end up in heaven? And isn’t heaven their goal? So, wouldn’t they be thanking God for not rescuing them which would have delayed their entrance into heaven. God would be praising them for not accepting aid and an extension of life – he could point to all the sinners who took the offered “help/temptation” who would live through a long sad retirement, meeting their grandchildren, and then go right to hell for not wanting heaven enough.
And I suddenly begin to channel Comfortman (who eats Comfort Food):
“The priest is like the atheist, waiting to spontaneously develop flippers and gills through his false god ‘Evolution.’ He doesn’t see that God provides through helpful individuals – what a God, to sit back and provide mortal, sinning humans the ability to save people from such terrible situations.
“The unbeliever will never get aboard the boat because his moral depravity makes him think that he will evolve the ability to swim, whereas the Christian knows that God is the buoyancy that keeps the boat floating, and the helicopter from crashing into the sun which is only five miles in the air.”
The version of that joke that I heard involved either a Jehovah’s Witness or a Christian Scientist refusing three simple procedures that would have saved their lives. When they get to heaven and ask God, “why didn’t you save me?” his response was “Hey, I tried three times!”
There’s a story from Anthony DeMello about a guy with such a high faith in God, that when visiting the master leaves his cammel outside without the use of a tie knot, because God protects him.
The master, upon hearing of this, screams something like “you idiot! go tie your cammel, God has more important things to do than look out for a horse”.
So, even for the religious people out there, don’t compensate your stupidity with the protection from imaginary friends.
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