Cost of Beheading Jesus and Joseph: $7,685

Plus two years of probation.

That’s the case for a 21-year-old from Illinois who used a lead pipe to knock the heads off of Jesus and Joseph statues in front of a church.

A Virgin Mary statue suffered collateral damage.

A McHenry County man pleaded guilty Thursday to allegations he decapitated statues of Jesus and Joseph outside a Harvard church, avoiding a possible prison sentence for the vandalism spree earlier this year.

Skyler G. Hall, 21, of Harvard (a city in Illinois), instead must serve two years probation, pay a $500 fine and reimburse St. Joseph Catholic Church $7,185 after admitting guilt to a misdemeanor charge of criminal damage to property.

Police said there is no indication of any prior conflict between the church, or any church, and Hall.

“It was a deliberate, random act of vandalism,” Harvard police Lt. Andrew Oparyk said. “The reason? He just did it.”

Well, that was a dickish thing to do.

Thankfully, there’s no indication he’s an atheist…

I do have to give props to a Daily Herald commenter, TGSantini, for coming up with the best line for the story:

That’s what I call separation of church and pate.

Well played, sir.

(via Chicagoist)

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  • Eliza

    Is a “Joseph” statue worth as much as a “Jesus” statue? ‘Cuz Joseph does always seem to get the short end of the stick.

  • Eliza

    Did a quick online search. Joseph statues are dirt cheap compared with statues of baby or adult Jesus. The adult Jesus statues seem to only be available at Catholic sites.

    At what Jesus-age does a figurine go from being acceptable (in a nativity) to being idolatry (in the protestant view)??

  • RobL

    Nice that it was not blown up into something it was not. When the local Methodist church here got vandalized it was promoted as a hate crime instead of just stupid kids doing stupid things.