By going with an inquiring mind and an irenic attitude, you can find out for the rest of us what their actual positions are. Then report back what you found.

After reading the statement from the Vatican today about the “atheist” stance that evolution proves there is no god,(ack, giant strawman hurts my brain) my conclusion is that the only way we move forward is to argue against the real positions, not red herrings or outlying crazy folks or our misunderstanding of their beliefs.

Find their best arguments from their most reasonable people in spite of how distasteful it may be. You have to assume that at least a few of them aren’t complete idiots and can at least present an interesting position.

Or go and flirt with guys.

Or, as some others have mentioned, make ironic arguments ostensibly favoring their position but with flaws even they should be able to see, and/or that would turn others off (those who aren’t already firmly in their camp) if they were to use such arguments themselves. Perhaps, for example:“a woman being a lesbian means she’s being sexual in her own right rather than accepting men’s God-given authority over her sexuality” or “a woman being a lesbian means she’s exercising her own sexuality rather than exercising a man’s sexuality”“men who are gay are reduced to the status of women: men ought to screw, not be screwed”“genitals matter, people!” or “it matters whether you have a penis or a vagina!”Arguments like those might well resonate with those people. However, the arguments are overtly sexist, which many people— who aren’t already firmly in the sexist camp— are offended by, or at least uncomfortable with, so such arguments might turn them away from the anti-gay side. Just as with elections: you’re not going to convince hardcore partisans from the other side, it’ll be decided by those in the middle who can be swayed.

(I chose gender as the basis for those examples because, ultimately, homophobia is sexism, in which approval of something depends on the genders of the people involved.)

Hope I didn’t post this too late for it to be considered. Heh.

option four. innocent and confused is always the way to go.

I agree, best way to get honest answers

One down, one hundred million to go.

To Bruce, I’d like to say, it’s a bad idea to record people without their permission. You can be arrested for that in some states, sued in many others. Best to walk in with video camera obviously in hand so nobody can claim not to have known what was going on, and if anyone says they don’t want to be recorded, just walk away.