The Nine Circles of Atheist Hell

Jim Underdown, the Executive Director of the Center for Inquiry – Los Angeles, takes a page from Dante’s Inferno and outlines his Nine Circles of Atheist Hell:

Circle #5

Any Catholic church in August in Chicago. You are sentenced to a perpetual wedding mass which includes taking communion, doing all the Stations of the Cross, and having gone to confession beforehand. You were at the groom’s bachelor party last night where you timed each other drinking juice glasses full of warm Southern Comfort. In church you notice grass stains on your suit. You don’t know whether to puke or pass out.

Circle #7

An Evangelical mega-church in Colorado Springs. Your punishment is for all eternity to procure methamphetamine and gay sex for Ted Haggard. He grabs your neck and gives you two creepy squeezes to thank you.

(via Center for Inquiry)


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