The Virgin Mary’s Full of Crap. Wait. Reverse That.

July 18, 2009 By Guest Contributor 15 Comments

The Virgin Mary has been found yet again.

In bird shit.

VirginCrap

Holy crap. (Literally?)

It’s not even a joke. They’re taking it seriously.

Cristal Pachuca said she took pictures and began making calls to invite others to see, what she describes as, a miracle.

“We just all feel protected. It’s a blessing to our family and to everybody that comes to see it,” says Cristal Pachuca.

…

Since Sunday, a steady stream of family, friends, neighbors and strangers has stopped by to pray and take pictures of the image.

To Christian people:

Really? REALLY?!

Who among you is going to inform Cristal and her family that they’re all being crazy? That they’re staring at shit? That they should just wash their truck?

None of you?

*sigh*

Gotta love this ironic comment on the KWTX site:

It’s things like this that make Christians look stupid. Christianity is about a personal relationship with Jesus Christ which causes you to love and serve others. It’s not about superstitious nonsense. When you are seeing images in bird poop, you’ve lost perspective a long time ago.

Says the person who believes Jesus was born of a virgin…

What makes this story (and others like it) ridiculous is not the wacky family that prays to a piece of shit.

What’s ridiculous is that only a handful of Christians will ever come out and say this family is crazy. Others may laugh at the story, but they won’t say the family is wrong. They let them off the hook in the name of faith.

That’s crazy.

And then you wonder why people like me don’t take your beliefs seriously.

Filed Under: General 15 Comments
  • Richard Wade

    You know, that also kind of looks like… well, never mind. I suppose somebody will eventually see God in that too. After all, they usually yell out his name when the time comes.

  • Thumpalumpacus

    I find the medium utterly appropriate.

  • http://superstitionfree.blogspot.com Robert Madewell

    I see female genitalia. Of course, I see female genitalia all the time.

  • http://logofveritas.blogspot.net Veritas

    I’m glad I’m not the only person seeing…ah…something Mary never really used properly. Just….wow.

    Edit: It could be a Dementor from Harry Potter, too, since we’re discussing characters from fiction.

  • bonefish

    A miracle… bird shit. Crazy people annoy me.

  • «bønez_brigade»

    Mewonders how many of them kissed the blessed virgin.

  • Geoff

    I couldn’t see a geographical reference, but I bet this was from Texas, where cattle outnumber human neurons (excluding those brought in by visitors of course).

  • Bruce A

    Not all christians – just the catholics. No christian I know would shit himself (no pun intended) over a supposed vision of the “holy virgin” (much less called her that). Come to think of it, they wouldn’t have called catholics christians, either. It’s all a load of bovine fecal matter to me anyway.

    And yeah, I see vulva myself.

  • Aspentroll

    It’s just another case of “SHIT HAPPENS”.
    Actually I was waiting for this very thing to happen. There is just no where else for her to appear now.

  • Closet Atheist

    Isn’t all this Virgin Mary worship a form of idolatry? What happened to “Thou Shalt Have No Other Gods Before Me”?

    Shouldn’t Mary have been Hebrew? I see a white woman, not brown. Of course, I guess you can see what you want to when you create god in your own image.

  • J. J. Ramsey

    What’s ridiculous is that only a handful of Christians will ever come out and say this family is crazy. Others may laugh at the story, but they won’t say the family is wrong.

    Errm, I think in this case, laughing at the family is a way to say that they are probably wrong.

  • http://pastorwick.blogspot.com WICK

    That’s ridiculous….it just looks like a smudge. The poop on MY window, however…is totally Jesus. Totally. :)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eACk4pjxclA

  • http://woodpigeon.wordpress.com Colm

    Ha ha! Silly Americans! Such a thing could never happen in Ireland.

    Oh, hold on a second.. http://tinyurl.com/ldquw7

    Er, as you were..

  • lovely athiest

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xfqht0LEOWQ
    ima just leave this right here :D

  • http://christwire.org Mark Duncan

    Well, I see you have no tact and love to disrespect the holy mother of our Lord and Savior. Coincidentally, the burning sulfur of hell smells much like excrement, and it shall fill the heated noses of all atheists as the burn for all eternity.