If any of you can help out the Landover Baptist Church, they’re looking for help with their Halloween Hell House:
It only gets worse:
Look in dumpsters behind Planned Parenthood or each and every trash container in any government housing project! Put as many fetuses as you can into a strong plastic bag, then put them into a cooler and pack it with ice to keep the fetuses fresh. Remember, your packages must arrive before October 24th! Simply send whatever you can via US Postal Service to:
Landover Baptist University Hell House Ministry
425 Soulwinner’s Blvd.
Freehold, Iowa 85442
Please note that fetuses the Lord Jesus has aborted (AKA “miscarriages”) will not be accepted. We trust your word on this because we really can’t tell the diffference between the babies God aborts and the ones that Satan’s doctors abort.
I can’t believe I have to point this out, but someone will inevitably get all offended. It’s all satire, people.
Still, how much worse is it, really, than actual Hell Houses?