An Alternative to Coexisting?

I’m not sure how many atheists have this Coexist bumper sticker on their car…

Coexisting is fine. I’m all for that. But the sticker seems to imply that we shouldn’t criticize the beliefs of people who cling to these faiths. And that’s ridiculous. By all means, treat religious people with respect. Their ideas and beliefs, though, are fair game for scrutiny.

Reader Joe has made a bumper sticker that probably won’t win you any fans… but it offers a quick rebuttal to the Coexist notion:

I’ll hold off on getting one for now.

Because I like my car in one piece.

But if this sort of thing is up your alley, you can purchase your Fiction sticker here.

Joe has also offered to send a couple readers the bumper sticker for free! All you have to do is leave your favorite bumper sticker slogan in the comments.

If you’d like to win the prize, you must be a US resident and you must put the word “banjo” at the end of your comment. I’ll choose two random winners next week and get in touch with you regarding how to claim the bumper sticker.

  • beckster

    I Found Jesus! He’s been hiding behind the couch this whole time! (seen on car in Raleigh, NC)

    banjo

  • Kayla

    I’ve always wanted to get a bumper sticker that said something along the lines of “My Other Car is a Firefly.” – Or something equally geektastic.

    banjo.

  • Kareth

    I’ve always been fond of this one myself:

    Jesus Saves!
    …and takes half damage.

    banjo

  • http://www.santiagosmagic.com Tim

    I have seen a various times a collection of bumper stickers that all start with some phrase and end with “…and I vote.” Usually things like “I’m a dog lover and I vote” or “I’m Pagan and I vote.”

    My favorite, because at least it was honest, was “I hate you and I vote.” Don’t know who they hate one way or another but the complete and utter anti-socialness of it made me laugh.

  • Andrew Morgan

    All I can think when I see one of those stickers it that the owner is a smug, self-righteous prick who is incapable of independent thought.

  • Lauren

    since my car is such a mom-mobile, I love

    In case of rapture, can I have your car?

    banjo

  • Anonymous

    Applause!!!

  • http://happyatheists.com Slickninja

    I’ve for years had the Darwin fish humping the Jesus fish and the T-Rex Eating the Jesus fish on my car. The worst I’ve ever seen is in a parking lot someone was looking at it perplexed and I walked towards my car and they quickly walked away.

  • Natalie

    “I’ve read the bible, that’s why I’m an Atheist” :)

    And another:

    “Science flies you to the moon. Religion flies you into buildings.:

    banjo

  • jessica

    Funny, I would love to put this on my car…but I also love my Mini. Annoying that I know some nut would do something to my car.

  • Brian

    My favorite bumper sticker is a red one which reads
    “If this sticker is blue, you’re driving too fast”
    in reference to the red/blue shift.

  • CanadianNihilist

    I’d prefer one like this http://wallbase.net/wallpaper/823455

  • Elissa

    The favorite that’s on my car:

    “Born okay the first time”

    banjo

  • robin price

    Who needs a bumper sticker when u have an atheist tattoo?
    …..anyway,

    “Jesus saves, moses invests.”

    Yes the tattoo exists and…..banjo :)

  • Kris

    It seems like 9 times out of 10, a car with a coexist sticker is also plastered with about a dozen other tacky stickers.

  • CdAHumanist

    As much as I would love putting that sticker on our vehicle, I too would fear Christian vandalism. We do have the coexist sticker and a Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster jolly pirate fish on our car, though. The latter is nice because nobody other than people familiar with FSM have any idea what it means…..

  • Icaarus

    This actually reminds me of my favorite bumper sticker. Found in the movie Saved! of all things, it’s a Jesus fish with the word gefilte in the middle.

    That sticker is going in my office at some point.

  • Hangnail

    I saw “in case of rapture, this care will be driverless”. I think these bumper stickers make more atheists just because it shows how silly these people really think.
    banjo

  • stephen

    Yes, this is sexist, but I saw a lady (very nice looking) driving a baby blue jeep. To make it better, she had a bumper sticker with the “shocker” sign on it. Priceless.

    banjo

  • Mike

    I always thought the coexist idea was pretty good and well thought out. I’d maybe make a change and make the “O” into a circle with a line through it so it includes atheism.

    The sticker doesn’t “seem to imply” anything. It says we should coexist. I’m not sure how criticizing people is supposed to help.

  • Ashley Chamberlain

    I like the bumper sticker “ATHEIST”. It is straight to the point. I also have the sticker “I’m sorry I missed church, I was busy practicing witchcraft and becoming a lesbian”.

    Banjo

  • CanadianNihilist

    Tell me something Mike,
    How would you feel if your kids were told to calm down and coexist with the christian kids while they’re taught Creationism?

    An atheist cannot coexist with religious beliefs. The people yes, but their beliefs are wrong and quite often dangerous.

  • Digitus Impudicus

    “Jesus saves. Passes to Gretsky. Gretsky shoots. He scores!”
    banjo

  • Roxane

    Freedom is measured by the distance between church and state.

    banjo

  • Lauren

    Robin, SWEET! I havwe an atheist atom tat with the A in the center on my shoulder as well. Morons always come up and ask me if its because I like nuclear weapons *roll eyes* lol!

    I LOVE the Gretzky one~!!

    I saw a great political one, even if it doesn’t jibe with the atheist sentiments: Palin/Satan 2012 Lololol!!

  • Douglas Kirk

    “Silly Christian, Myths are for kids”
    banjo

  • CB

    “Real men find Jesus sexually attractive.”

    bango

  • JD

    I thought the point of the coexist logo was that we can all live together without trying to kill each other. I would say the “fiction” design isn’t a rebuttal, it completely misses the point.

  • Jon Peterson

    Dodge Jesus is still my favorite.

    Banjo

  • OverlapingMagisteria

    I enjoy this bumper sticker I saw once:

    GOD LOVES YOU*
    *Some restrictions apply

  • CptDzastr

    “Bumper stickers are an ineffectual means of communicating my nuanced views on a variety of issues that cannot be reduced to a single pithy slogan.”

    banjo

  • Russ Greene

    “Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup.”

  • Apatheist

    Just as I don’t care if you’re a Christian when I’m stuck in traffic, I don’t care if you’re an Atheist. Keep your beliefs to yourself and get out of my lane.

  • RTH

    I found Jesus. He was hiding in my trunk when I got back from Tijuana.

    banjo

  • jumbo

    “I swear to drunk I’m not God”

    banjo

  • holeydood3

    My favorite bumper sticker that I’ve seen: “God Doesn’t Exist. So, I Guess That Means No One Loves You.”

  • ButchKitties

    Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. What else are car bumpers for, if not for warning me about imaginary dangers like hellfire or dragon fire?

    What would Scooby do? He’d realize that every mystery ever solved has turned out to be… not magic.

    My favorite is a red bumper sticker that says: If this is blue, you are going to fast. Doppler effect jokes FTW.

    banjo

  • Kim A

    Saw this driving home from the gym the other day: “Voldemort Votes Republican”

  • Adam

    “Jesus saves, only takes half damage.”/nerd

    My favorite I saw was “Jesus take the wheel.” And the car had hit a pole.

    The staple of the hillbilly stereotype-
    banjo

  • Lauren Eve Pomerantz

    It’s not a bumper sticker, but I recently saw one of those magnetic ribbons with the text that says, “Support the makers of magnetic ribbons.”

    It wasn’t a sign so much as a banner, because I printed it on continuous feed paper with one of the banner programs available back then. It said, “Don’t Let Operation Rescue Oppress You,” followed by the number for the Clinic Defense Alliance. (I was working for the Feminist Majority in Los Angeles.) It got me two tires slashed at Disneyland. I hope it got some bodies in the streets, too.

    Banjo

  • Jeff.B

    Jesus is my co-pilot…and my gardener.

    banjo

  • http://religiouscomics.net Jeff P

    I prefer a bumper sticker that is more sensitive to the feeling of others like this one which I labored on for about 2 minutes from the other ones shown. ;) banjo

  • Kevin S.

    Complete strawman, CanadianNihilist. The coexist message is about not killing each other over our different beliefs (or lack thereof). It doesn’t say at all that one should accept the theocratization (no, not a word) of secular institutions.

  • pmsrhino

    I don’t think the fiction sticker made out of religious symbols is new. My brother had one on his car over a year ago. It was the center of much contention between him and my father. My father even ended up taking it upon himself to removed the sticker while cleaning the car after my brother had to leave it here so we could get it to our mechanic for him. My father was so ridiculous about it he had me drive the incredibly unsafe car (it stalled anytime you even thought about the brake, and I got to drive it freeway speeds in the rain) from the mechanics to our house because he basically would not touch it because of one sticker.

    So yes, I believe this sticker is nothing new, but by my experience the sticker will keep any religious person from ever touching your car. Ever. Although, to be fair, the car was struck by lightning while he was driving it, which is what eventually killed the car, so take that as you will…

  • Rich Wilson

    Mine is too long for a bumper sticker, but I recently had a t-shirt made with:

    One Nation
    (long list of US religious breakdown percentages taken from Pew poll)
    Indivisible

    1st line red, stats lines white, last line blue, all on black. It didn’t come out quite right, in that the blue is a bit dark and hard to read, but I’ll keep working on it.

    banjo

  • http://www.calladus.com Calladus

    My favorite bumper sticker:

    4 out of 5 voices in my head say, “Don’t Shoot!”

    aaaand…. BANJO!

  • AgnosticOracle

    Quick stupid question: the stylized F in fiction, what religion if any is that one?

  • Larry Fiehn

    Since Kentucky recently became one of the states where you can get “In God We Trust” license plates, I ordered some bumper stickers which say “I no God I trust”.

  • Edmond

    I saw this one here in Seattle, it’s not specifically atheist, but it had a good message that combats rhetoric that I, as a gay atheist, have to face all the time.

    “I am NOT a failed attempt at being you.”

    banjo

  • Thackerie

    Meh. I prefer the “idiots” bumper sticker created by Normal Bob Smith, the dress-up Jesus guy.

  • Mark

    My favorite is

    “If going to church makes you a christian does parking in a garage make you a car?”

    Banjo

  • http://religiouscomics.net Jeff P

    @AgnosticOracle,

    Must be FSM

  • http://madhominem.wordpress.com/ Mad Hominem

    The classic hippie van bumper sticker: “Not all who wander are lost.”
    banjo

  • anjiko-z

    This one is currently on my car. The Jesus Sci-Fi Ray Gun!
    http://liveforfilms.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/raygun-jesus-fish.jpg

    Banjo

  • Claudia

    I’ve held off a long time on questioning the “friendly” part of the blog name because though I have noticed a hardening in tone, I didn’t see it as so worriesome. However here you’re really straying into PZ Myers decidedly unfriendly territory.

    C’mon. Coexist doesn’t mean we think every religious label is valid. By definition every single one of the religions represented think all the others are wrong. It doesn’t mean we aren’t allowed to question beliefs, just that well meaning people can get along while doing so.

    The message of the Coexist bumper sticker is really “Can’t we all just get along”? It’s a nice, if totally superficial, sentiment. It isn’t even entirely about religion, as the “O” is a peace sign and the “e” is a melding of the male and female signs. It’s just a hippieish “be nice” sign.

    The Fiction bumper sticker is too dickish for me, both because I’m not really big on unsolicited reminders to others that they are wrong about god. There’s a difference between affirming your own belief and shitting on someone else’s. If you don’t think so ask yourself which is more irritating: A jesus fish bumper sticker or one that says “The fool hath said in his heart, there is no God”? I will admit that I’d make an exception for anti-creationist or anti-vaxxer signs, because I find them so nail-bitingly irritating.

  • Stephen

    JESUS SAVES!
    By shopping smart and using coupons.

    Hey! Is that a Rickenbacher Banjo

  • Lai

    I agree with Claudia. I’m all for debating with others the validity of their faiths, but I’m not keen on the thought of completely debasing what they believe in, just as much as I wouldn’t want them to shit on my disbelief. After all, large numbers of my family are still religious to some degree but I would like to think they would “coexist” with me despite my agnostic/atheism. I’d let them believe what they want as long as it’s not stupidly infringing on rights or common sense.

  • GregFromCos

    In case of rapture…
    I’ll be taking your car

    Banjo

  • GregFromCos

    My favorite jaw dropping saying (although not original), although I’ve yet to buy a t-shirt with it is:

    Faith may not move mountains…
    But look what it does to skyscrapers!

    Banjo

  • NotYou007

    I use my car for work so I keep bumper stickers off of it but my all time favorite is ” Give Blood, Play Hockey ” people do not tailgate you when you have that bumper sticker on your car.

    Now I wanna go ice skating and play some ice hockey.

  • Erin

    “Tailgate me and roll for damage”

    Got that for my bf at xmas

    BANJO

  • Dave

    I am my own pilot. It’s safer for me and you this way.

  • http://oddboyout.blogspot.com/ oddboyout

    “Save a Cow, Eat a Baby”

    banjo

  • treedweller

    I agree with the minority here. The whole point of the Coexist sticker is not that we have to agree that every faith is valid; the point is, despite disagreeing, we can all get along.

    I have wanted but not made a sticker that says “Jesus is coming. Bring him a tissue.”

    My car looks like this, except I also have added a small sticker for local community radio station KOOP: http://tinypic.com/r/2aak7lt/7 (check out those mudflaps). It’s a VW TDI, missing the I. my next sticker will be either an eyeball or an eyepatch for that space.

    hammered dulcimer (not interested in the freebie, IOW)

  • john1017

    the gretzky one is awesome. I also really like the skyscraper idea. As far as coexisting, I don’t want to. I shit on their beliefs because they DO shit on my disbelief. Of course, living in tennessee for 30+ years probably has not helped my tolerance level. The religious are my enemies, family or not. Personally I would love to wake up tomorrow and all of the religious be gone. Not because of the rapture or some other silly myth, just gone. Maybe aliens vaporized them. Maybe they all built a spaceship and went to coexist in the void. Don’t care, it’s my fantasy and they’re just gone.

  • Don

    “What would Elvis do?” or “Elvis loves you.”

  • Annie

    My favorite: “Our schools need a moment of science.” Not necessarily an atheist bumper sticker, but it conveys a message many of us feel strongly about.

    Also “WWJB: Who would Jesus Bomb?” is a favorite, though I would never put it on my car. I’m not really into stirring up trouble just for fun.

    I think the Coexist bumper sticker was a refreshing upgrade from “Can’t we all just get along?”

  • Catherine

    “Religion keeps the poor from killing the rich.” My personal fav. Sorry if someone already posted. There’s a ton here! Didn’t read them all….

  • http://www.phoenixgarage.org/ cr0sh

    Back in the mid-late 1980s my family and I were on a road trip thru Oregon; anyhow, I remember seeing this ratty dodge pickup with a grizzled old man driving it (with a gun-rack in the window) who had a bumper sticker that read:

    I (heart) Spotted Owls…Fried.

    I you remember the enviro-controversy of that time about the critter, the joke makes more sense…

    banjo

  • Kenny

    @Claudia & Lai: YAWN!

  • L.Long

    FICTION is an old sign. About 2 yrs ago I saw a very pretty one as a banner on a blog-site either Friendly Atheist or Good Atheist??? I ‘stole’ it and have it on my screen saver.
    I don’t put any bumper stickers on my car…they look really shitty after a while and take too much work cleaning them off.
    I use a very heavily loaded screen saver on my computers that has caused a few shocked expressions.

  • http://nssphoenix.wordpress.com drdave

    Atheism is not a religion. Its a personal relationship with reality.

    banjo

  • http://nssphoenix.wordpress.com drdave

    Republicans are pro life; until you’re born.

    banjo

  • dauntless

    The law of gravity: Ignorance of the law is not an excuse to fall. -banjo

  • http://hauntedtimber.wordpress.com/ timberwraith

    I’m with Claudia on this, too. It pushes the boundaries of decorum a bit too much for me.

    Now, I know that someone is going to assert that people do not have the right to not be offended. Very well, but do realize that offense and disrespect are two way streets. You will inevitably receive that which you dish out. Therefore, why complain when a religious person makes an insulting comment about your perspectives? After all, you behave as they do.

  • ACN

    I see. So am I allowed to claim deep offense and disrespect everytime I see a “jesus fish” or a “jesus saves” bumper sticker? I suppose that I could if I wanted to be hypersensitive, but wouldn’t that be more than a little ridiculous? I don’t think it is disrespectful or offensive to put a jesus fish or a “jesus is the only way” on their own car. I don’t see why it is considered deeply offensive to put a “fiction” sticker on my own car.

  • ickyuck
  • skivett

    “God is like the boogeyman for adults”

    “Jesus is like Santa for adults”

    banjo

  • narpas

    I’m just bummed that they changed the “e” in coexist from e=mc^2 to the astrological sign.

  • treedweller

    @ACN I don’t dispute your right to put any sticker on your car, nor your (nor anyone’s) right to be offended by, well, anything. But the OP suggests we should be offended, or at least annoyed, by the Coexist sticker, which just doesn’t make sense to me and seems to completely miss the point of its message.

    It might be a little pollyanna-ish, but I don’t think it demands a response in the vein of the Fiction sticker. The latter has just as much right to exist (as if it needs my permission), but I just don’t see the point in juxtaposing the two.

  • MikeH

    I am an atheist, a humanist, former Marine, and advocate for peace. I have COEXIST, Darwin fish and Support our Troops bumper stickers on my car. I can imagine that in some ways these contradict each other. But I think that the very ideals that make this country great insist on these three trains of thought. Our military has been the cornerstone in the resistance to the spread of tyranny; our science has fostered the resistance to plagues and promoted health; and our idea that all men are created equal, and therefore deserve equal respect, has prevented the US from an attempt to outright conquer the rest of the world. A wise man once said that you attract more flies with honey than vinegar. I do not agree with all religions, nor all religious views. But it is naive to think that in any near future that the rest of the world that opposes my views will simply and blindly accept my point of view. Depending on who you ask, religion is responsible for more death in the world than any other differences between people. COEXIST asks that we stop pointing fingers and demanding ‘I am right, and you are wrong’ and simply agree to disagree. FICTION, though in my eyes is correct, is unduely insulting, and gets back to the finger pointing. Yawn if you must at my rant. But, do not deliberately hit the proverbial hornet’s nest with this FICTION sticker. I would rather live in peace with believers, than in fear of my safety. Too many atheists get too high on their soapbox, and are as bad as our congress in their inability to compromise. We will never live in a world without religion. There can be a world without so much animosity.

  • John

    “Jesus is my co-pilot”
    “Pontius is my Pilate”

    banjo

  • http://hauntedtimber.wordpress.com/ timberwraith

    The equivalent to a “jesus fish” or “jesus saves” bumper sticker would be something like a scarlet A or “science illuminates” on the back of an atheist’s car. They signify that the driver is of a particular philosophical persuasion while not engaging in negative statements about others. I’m not really offended by these kinds of stickers. I might roll my eyes sometimes, but whatever. It’s their car and their life.

    The “fiction” bumper sticker is more the equivalent of a Christian having the word “amoral” on a bumper sticker, where the letter “a” is a the atheist scarlet letter “a”. Since the latter implies a negative valuation about my perspective—that my philosophies lack a moral or ethical direction—I would be offended. Of course, both bumper stickers represent widely held perspectives that Christians and atheists hold toward each other’s philosophies.

    I suppose that if a straight person called me a “lesbo” I could respond by calling them a “breeder”, but I’m pretty sure that I have more constructive ways of interacting with contentious people who are outside of my demographic.

  • http://atheistreadsbible.blogspot.com/ Jude

    It’s not an atheist bumper sticker, but as a band geek and mother of band geeks, my favorite bumper sticker shows instruments and says “My child plays better than yours” My son made it into our state’s All State Choir and All State Band, so I’m not exaggerating when I say that. I hate the Coexist bumper sticker–a Catholic acquaintance of mine has that one on her car–so I like the idea of the Fiction bumper sticker. I might even be brave enough to put it on my car.

    banjo

  • 5ive

    “jesus loves you, but he loves me more”

    “Paddle faster, I hear banjo music”

    “cthulhu saves……some for later”

    Banjo, FTW!

  • rose

    The best one I saw said;
    “Doing my best to piss off the Religious Right”.
    banjo

  • annette

    “Born right the first time”
    and
    “Focus on your own damn family”

    Annette

    banjo!

  • http://www.letsgetincharacter.blogspot.com Sarah

    Not interested in the sticker, because it’s too borderline dickish for my tastes, but my favorite stickers (not atheistic) were:

    Obamanos! (I’m actually an Obama-voting Democrat, but that made me laugh my ass off)

    and

    I have the perfect body. . .I’m storing it in the trunk.

  • Pat

    Religion: bringing comfort to people in a world torn apart by religion.

    Jon Stewart (I think)

  • Apollo

    “For every animal you don’t eat, I’m going to eat three.”

  • Guillaume

    What Would Darwin Do?

    banjo

  • cat

    Not a bumper sticker, but a sign from an old LGBT rights protest during the Nam era “Suck cocks against the war!”

  • ursulamajor

    I remember the excitement and hope I had when I put the Obama/Biden sticker on my van. Little did we know then to what extremes the right will go to just shit on anything he tries to do.

    I also have “I give evolution 2 opposable thumbs up” on my bumper.

    banjo

  • CaptJackSparrow

    Custer got Siouxed. Banjo

  • Vanessa

    This one’s on my car: “Evolution is only a theory, kind of like gravity.”

    Banjo

  • Brian

    My honor roll student is smarter than your Trinity College graduate.

    Banjo!

  • http://www.decorateyourspace.net/designstrategies/wordpress Denise

    An oldie but a goodie:
    Dich Cheney before he dicks you.
    Banjo

  • martha

    “586,000 miles per second, it’s not just a good idea, it’s the law.”

    (My favorite from the energy crisis days of the 70s, when the slogan was “55 mph, it’s not just a good idea, it’s the law.”

  • Kelly

    “Pat Robertson is proof that intelligent design is a myth.” “banjo”

  • mia

    Born alright the first time.

    and

    U.S. out of my uterus

    banjo!

  • http://getinhangon.wordpress.com/ Meg

    Back when I was homeschooling I had a one/two combo that I loved.

    Next to a Darwin fish I had a bumper sticker with: “Socialization: The best reason to homeschool”

    I would often watch people look back and forth between the two of them. I assume that they had trouble understanding that they could be the same person.

    Banjo

  • Kelly

    “Karl Marx was wrong, religion is the opium of the asses.” “banjo”

  • Kelly

    “Jesus on board. One of his followers in the trunk.” “banjo”

  • Kristi

    I sported the “Toxic” sticker on my car for a long time until I moved to the Bible Belt and someone sliced it up (along with scratching my paint!)

  • Revyloution

    My favorite bumper sticker says:

    My Political views are too
    complex to fit on a bumper sti

    What do you get if you leave a banjo in an unlocked car?

    Another banjo.

  • albert maas

    If Jesus is the answer, how stupid could the question have been?

    Do you love cats ? Let’s share recipes!

  • Ross

    Tldr. Sorry if these have been used:

    Kenobi 08 – our only hope.

    Make install, not war.

    (republican background) Voldemort 08

    Watch the road jackass!

    Banjo

  • Ross

    my other ride is your mom.

  • http://miketheinfidel.blogspot.com/ MikeTheInfidel

    The two on my car right now:
    “Born-Again Atheist” and “Fundamentalism Stops a Thinking Mind”

    I also like “God less America” with a small flag between “God” and “less”. Most people don’t even notice it… they just gloss over the missing ‘b’.

    banjo

  • http://www.robinlionheart.com/ Robin Lionheart

    I like “Republicans for Voldemort”.

    And banjo.

  • http://zynd.me/fgqv5H Robert

    My favorite has to be the one I created for the back of my car. I came up with the saying, could not find it anywhere on the net, so I claimed it for myself. It’s now on a multi-color but easy to read sticker on the back window of my car.

    “I’ll Take Human Rights over Religious Wrongs”

  • Shoop

    Tree hugging Earth loving dirt worshiper

  • coyotenose

    “Age And Treachery Will Always Triumph Over Youth And Skill.”

    - sticker I kept on my primary “Vampire: the Masquerade” roleplaying game folder for many years.

    banjo

  • http://girlofthegaps.blogspot.com/ Nicole Schrand

    I got some fun ones this weekend from the Planned Parenthood booth at an on-campus festival (don’t know if they’ll go on my car when I get one, but I like them, sooo…)

    “Just Wear It” (inside condom outline)

    “Family Planning is PRO-FAMILY”

    “Parenthood is Forever. PLAN IT!”

    banjo

  • http://www.atheistapologist.com AtheistApologist

    I’m partial to “Thank God For Atheists” or “Without Atheism, I’d Have Nothing to Believe!”

  • Valhar2000

    A good one:

    “Bumper stickers are for losers”

  • AWayfaringStrainer

    Wow. Over 100 comments already. I haven’t seen my favorite, yet:

    Don’t Pray in My School and I Won’t Think in Your Church

    banjo

  • http://cranialhyperossification.blogspot.com GDad

    I thought of this one a while back as a response to those NRA stickers about car protection.

    “This car protected by Avada Kedavra.”

    banjo

  • http://www.correntewire.com chicago dyke

    “If Men could get pregnant, Abortion would be a Sacrament.”

    banjo.

  • bob42

    I found Jesus in Florida!

    (smaller print)

    Where else would a 2000 year old Jew live?

  • Sara

    I saw one the other day that said “God’s original plan was to hang out naked in a garden with a couple of vegetarians.” This car also had the coexist sticker.

    Banjo

  • Scott

    I’ve had one bumper sticker on the back of my pathfinder for years and years. It was originally distributed by a band called The Locust. It reads:

    “Get off the cross…the wood is needed.” and has a sketch of a locust next to it.

    It gets various comments, and every now and again I can spot someone snapping a cell phone picture of it in my rear-view mirror.

    The only other decals on my car are hockey related, so I don’t get too much flak for it.

    BANJO

  • treedweller

    @Denise reminded me of one I saw that I liked: “Dick Cheney Shoots His Friends”

    And I also remembered a gift from when I graduated high school:
    “My parents think I’m at college”

    I like @Revyloution’s, too.

  • doglovingirl

    I had a Darwin fish on my car in North Carolina; came back to the trailhead after a short backpacking trip and found the fish ripped off, broken in half, and stuck back on the car. Sheesh, someone couldn’t BEAR to see that on my car, eh?

    Also — sorry to be such a dunce, but — what does “banjo” mean, y’all??? :-)

  • scott

    “Free The Bound Periodicals!”

    banjo

  • http://www.belovedspear.org Beloved Spear

    Um…what’s the “F?”

    I can see that Jews and Christians and Muslims and Wiccans and Buddhists and Druids are being insulted, but I just can’t figure out which belief system is being mocked with the “F.”

    Falun Gong, maybe? They seem too minor to pick on, though, and not prone to illuminated letters.

    Y’all aren’t being mean to the FSM, I hope. His Noodly Wrath will be most terrible if you are.

  • stogoe

    I have the Republicans for Voldemort t-shirt. If I ever put a bumper sticker on my car, it would be the “My other vehicle’s a Firefly” one.

  • Russell

    I haven’t found this one yet, so I created it myself:
    http://postimage.org/image/rbwmtw3o/

    “I believe in the virgin Joseph”

  • http://www.correntewire.com chicago dyke

    the F may not stand for a word, but i took it to suggest wiccan or pagan belief. ymmv.

  • Tricia

    After my divorce I got a bumper sticker that said:

    “It’s better to have loved and lost, then to spend the rest of your life with a psycho”

    banjo

  • justin

    “yeah its got a hemi” on an old beat up honda civic. not usually a fan of the hipster irony movement, but that one cracked me up.

    i wish i could play the banjo

  • txindie

    speaking of bumper stickers that will get your car trashed. I have seen this happen to a university professor’s car:

    ‘Don’t labor under a misconception, keep abotion legal’

  • aleina1313

    “If money is the root of all evil, why do churches beg for it?”

    banjo

  • scurry

    I saw this one on the way to work:
    Dear God, Save us from your followers.

    I Have this one on my own car:
    Caution: May Contain Nut.

  • scurry

    Oh – Also the “Flying Spaghetti Monster” and WWMD… What would MacGyver Do?

  • Margy

    In the 80′s, when “Child on Board” bumper stickers were everywhere, I had this on my beat-up old Celica:

    “It’s okay to hit me. NO child on board.”

    For the last five years or so, I have had a Darwin fish, an FSM, and a sticker on my car that says “If we give gay people equal rights, then everyone will want them!”

    So far, my car has been safe (I live in Northern CA). I sympathize with those in the Bible Belt. I was born and raised in Texas, and it gets loonier there all the time.

    I agree with Claudia that the “Fiction” sticker is dickish. Mandolin.

  • CJ :)

    My all time favorite: “The boat sank. Deal with it.”

    banjo

  • David

    I have a “FICTION” sticker on my car that i purchased last year. It’s attached to a magnetic backing that enables me to remove it from my car at any time (and replace it with any of the other bumper stickers I have…depending on my mood!).

    I obviously see nothing wrong with the FICTION bumper sticker. It’s stating a truth. If others want to believe there is a magic sky god by putting various fish and “jesus saves” stickers on their cars, why shouldn’t I express my viewpoint that all the various religions are man-made aka fiction?

    Sometimes the truth hurts.

    • guest

      So David, how do you explain all the historians who have documented Jesus’ existence OUTSIDE of the Bible? His existence is more provable than the life of Julius Ceasar people just don’t bother to research both sides of the debate. These non-biblical historians also documented his unexplainable miracles. Inventing a religion to eventually have your head one day cut off just doesn’t make sense. Research Lee Strobel’s work. He was an aetheist journalist whose attempt to debunk Christianity led to his conversion.

      • Dkoellner

        I am sure in a few hundred years there will be books about David Koresh as well. Will you accept him as your savior then.

      • holycrap

        Yah, hi…Can you name any of those historians for us? nevermind. It doesnt matter. As an atheist, I’m okay with the existence of jesus. he probably did exist. who cares? other than whats in that 2000 year old book, do you have any evidence that particular jesus actually performed miracles? can you cite your sources for us?

        Also, Lee Strobel is an idiot.

  • Troglodyke

    “Militant Agnostic: I don’t know, and you don’t, either.”

    banjo

  • Troglodyke

    Another couple I have:

    One Nation Under Educated

    and

    “The biggest threat to marriage
    is the wedding of church and state.”

  • Amy

    I like this one-
    God told me to tell you to stop putting words in his mouth.

  • Nancy

    My favorite is GOT SCIENCE?

  • Hugh

    “Fundamentalists can kiss my left behind”

    http://www.cafepress.com/goddam_liberal.16499929

    Banjo

  • Defiantnonbeliever

    I’ve seen the fiction sticker idea before on a bumper sticker for sale. I think it may have been here http://www.seesharppress.com/20reasons.html on Chad Bufe’s site. It used a fancy double ‘Greek’? cross for the F. I’m not sure if it’s still available.

  • http://plancksconstant.org/ bernie from planck’s

    As a young man in high school (1960s) my car had a bumper sticker that read: “F*ck Communism” without the asterisk.

    Sadly my kids sometimes use my car and I cannot endanger their lives so I cannot sport a bumper sticker that says: “F*ck Islam.” Without the *.

    banjo.

  • jbhiker

    “So many Christians, so few lions”

    banjo

  • dave

    Suitable for a bumper sticker, it’s what I say everytime I pass a church with a “Jesus saves” sign…

    “…and Trottier scores on the rebound!”

    banjo

  • Unbeliever

    My favorites are a tad long for a bumper sticker:

    Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day.
    Give a man religion, and he’ll starve to death while praying for a fish…

    -and-

    I used to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, until I found out he was cheating on me…

  • Vinay

    On the bumper sticker this is written in Latin:

    “If you can read this, you’re both extremely well educated and much too close.”

    banjo

  • http://annainca.blogspot.com Anna
  • Jon

    “Save a cow. Eat a vegetarian.”

  • Librarian

    I think the F represents Illuminated Manuscripts from the Middle Ages, very Catholic.

  • Sage

    “YOU CAN’T BE PRO LIFE AND ANTI ZOMBIE!”, has got to be my favorite.

  • Bradley

    God was my Copilot, but we crashed and I had to eat him

    banjo

  • CSN

    Why is this so hard: The “F” is just the stylized first letter so common in FICTION books!

    Regarding the sticker, I bought two. Can’t decide what I think about it though, I like it independently but less so as a perceived rebuttal to “coexist.” Maybe I will get both, which will confuse people, which I enjoy.

  • Guitarzan

    “Jesus Saves and so can you when you shop at Wal Mart” and
    “Jesus loves you; Everyone else thinks you’re an asshole” are two oldies but goodies that come to mind…

    Banjo?

  • Mark

    Any particular reason all of the attacks are against Jesus. Doesn’t Buddha and Mohammed deserve some attention? Let’s not forget the Jews. I think Christians ought to put this bumper sticker on their cars. In reality, one cannot be a Christian, live in a Muslim country and really believe they can ‘coexist’.

  • Pitypatdd

    I am a Christian, but I like the ‘coexist’ bumper stickers. Kind of like – ‘can’t we all just get along’. I believe everyone should have a chance to hear the Gospel, but I also believe everyone should choose for themselves their faith. I would like to have a bumper sticker that reads, “Hate the sin, but love the sinner.” We, as a human race, should show kindness and compassion to all people in need, no matter what their religion/faith. 

  • Gmavery

    Fav bumper sticker:
    “Don’t let a Christian keep you from knowing Christ”

    We, as Christians should live and act as an example of Christ. We may be the only Bible that those that are around us may ever read. But, we all fall short everyday, so merely looking at the life of a Christian may not be the example you were looking for. People, because of our sinful nature will always disappoint, let us down, so look only to Jesus and His Word; eternal life in Heaven. Banjo

  • Mojosthebomb

    Dog is my co-pilot.

  • Hamm3

    Nuke a gay whale for Jesus 

  • Andy Wrasman

    I have a sticker in response to the religious pluralism that is often attributed to Coexist. I made one that says Contradict – They Can’t All Be True. I don’t take the route that they are all fiction, but everyone has to admit that they can’t all be true, because they all Contradict each other. I included the Atheist symbol for those who would rock the Fiction sticker. Check out my sticker and site at http://www.contradictmovement.org.


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