The Female Reproductive System According to Todd Akin

(via Jest)

About Jessica Bluemke

Jessica Bluemke grew up in the suburbs of Chicago and graduated from Ball State University in 2008 with a BA in Literature. She currently works as a writer and resides on the North side of Chicago.

  • kenneth

    If this country were run on any sort of meritocracy model, people who evidence as much stupidity as Akin would be stripped of their job, sterilized, and re-assigned to a duty better suited to their intellect – like cleaning screen traps at a sewage treatment plant. 

    • pete084

       Do you think we could trust Akin with such a responsible job as cleaning sewage screens?

      • RobMcCune

        “I’ve heard from plumbers sewage screens don’t get clogged, if it’s a legitimate blockage the screen has ways to shut that whole thing down” 

        - Todd Akin

        • moother

          there is so much awesome in this parody i’d like to have it brass-plated and mounted in every courthouse in the nation

  • RobMcCune

    That’s not how Todd Akin would portray female anatomy, first it’s not pixilated, and nothing instructs you to look away and think of jesus.

    • onamission5

      This made me snork loud enough to wake the cat.

  • secular1

    Thanks for sharing Combating the willful ignorant media machine is a full time job.

    • Holytape

      Wish that cartoon was literally true.  Then they would have at least a slightly better grasp on mammalian anatomy.

  • Daphne

    LOL, I think this is a close representation of how Akin sees the female reproductive system, but I think there would be more question marks.

  • Michael

    Someone should tell him that the reason someone is more likely to get pregnant by her husband than by her rapist is that she has sex with her husband more often. That’s the mechanism he was trying to explain, more sex = more likely to conceive, one-off forced sex = less likely to conceive.

    Also just because something’s less likely doesn’t mean that healthcare can ignore it. You are unlikely to get cancer.

  • Antinomian

    With the aparent state of this man’s sex edumacashun, I feel soory for the women, if any, that he’s been sexually intimate with. I’m sure he hasn’t even had the “little man in the boat” lesson.

    • Tainda

      Row, row, row your boat

  • Holytape

    In all honesty, I don’t think that Akin’s realizes there are that many parts.  There is the sinny part (which includes nearly every part of a woman, i.e. stomach, arms, head, mouth, brain…) and then there is the baby hole.

    • onamission5

      I feel fairly certain that Akin views the babyhole as a sinny part as well any time there’s not a baby actively coming out of it. The only time a woman isn’t a dirty, dirty sinny part is during the god given miracle of forced childbirth, which is preferably either totally sterile and *zomgdonttalkaboutit* behind surgical doors or painful, horrible punishment for her slutty womanness. ‘Cause Eve and apples.

  • moother

    Babies! Now born through the urethra!

    • Cathy McGrath

      Does that mean men can start having them? Men have urethrae!

  • Margaret Whitestone

    Where’s the magic spermicide dispenser?