Pat Robertson Talks About Fifty Shades of Grey

In the latest clip from The 700 Club, even Pat Robertson‘s co-host Kristi Watts gets creeped out by him in the first few seconds:

My favorite line from Watts: “But you know what, Pat? This summer, the big book was Fifty Shades of… — was it Fifty Shades of Grey?”

Riiiight. Like she didn’t know the last word of the title… (yet, later, she correctly adds that it’s a trilogy.)

It’s incredible how much delusion they pack into 100 seconds. Robertson suggests that women were never interested in porn until the Fifty Shades of Grey books came out. To him, porn was always a “male” thing, a thing men “struggle” with. But these books have introduced porn to women!

Somewhere behind the camera, there must have been a group of female staffers pretending to be shocked — shocked! — about the existence of this thing called porn.

(Thanks to Josh for the link!)

About Hemant Mehta

Hemant Mehta is the editor of Friendly Atheist, appears on the Atheist Voice channel on YouTube, and co-hosts the uniquely-named Friendly Atheist Podcast. You can read much more about him here.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001627228091 Alexander Ryan

    Them using that as even more reason to deny women contraception in 3… 2… 

  • http://atheistlutheran.blogspot.com/ MargueriteF

    LOL. Pat kills me. “Now… a third of the millions of Americans who watch porn are… WOMEN! And they’re getting ADDICTED to it!” And I love it where he asks his female co-host if she’s at all interested in porn, and there’s a long pause before she bursts out defensively, “No!” Had to think hard about that one, didn’t she?

    As a writer of erotic romance, I admit to being frustrated that people in the media (not just Pat!) act as if the author of 50 Shades invented erotica for women. I wrote my first naughty book for a naughty publishing company in 2006. I’ve been writing naughty books ever since (and so have scads of other authors). I should send a few of them Pat’s way, but I imagine he’d just think I was… ADDICTED:-).

    • Charity

       Every time I read something about 50 Shades, I want to shout, “I read erotic fiction before it was cool!” :-)

      • Daniel

        Indeed.  Every time someone rants about how amazing the trilogy is, I want to give them a Reage, Roquelaure, Nin box set.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/John-Evans/1017276335 John Evans

        /me hands over pair of glasses with thick black frames. 

    • Stev84

      I’ve come to the conclusion that fundies think porn addiction is when you watch a movie every other week. That’s what I gathered from blogs and posts of people relating their “struggles” with porn. Few if any approached real addiction.

      And harlequin novels have been around for ages. Those have never been much more than thinly disguised porn

      • http://atheistlutheran.blogspot.com/ MargueriteF

        I suspect “addicted” means, “They LIKE it! No decent person could LIKE porn, could they? They must have an addiction!”

  • http://friendlyatheist.com Richard Wade

    Pat Robertson: Your Morning Hilarity.
     
    Sitting there leaning forward with his fingers laced together, asking Kristi what she gets out of porn reminded me of the lecherous and creepy Mr. Burns on The Simpsons. Robertson seems to be as intrigued as he pretends to be repulsed by the “shocking” idea that women enjoy erotica too.

    • The Other Weirdo

       Richard! You’ve ruined The Simpsons for me. FOR EVAR! And I liked Burns. Now I can’t look at him without seeing Robertson. Not cool, Richard. Not cool.

      • http://friendlyatheist.com Richard Wade

        Sorry, but maybe this will help: Burns is my favorite Simpsons character, and for me the association will make him all the funnier. 

        I stopped being infuriated by Pat Robertson when I realized that he’s a necessary part of civilization. The world is becoming a global village, and every village needs its idiot, and the village would be incomplete without him. Robertson is so cliche, so archetypal, that if he wasn’t playing the part, someone else would be. When he finally dies, his replacement will emerge very soon, and we can enjoy being both annoyed and amused by him or her.  Embrace the necessity of an entire cast of characters in the Mundane Comedy.

    • http://atheistlutheran.blogspot.com/ MargueriteF

      “I wonder if he just lost several thousand female viewers with that 1 minute, 44 seconds of inanity.”

      Exxxxxxxcellent.

    • RobMcCune

       Oh come on, Pat is a mix of Flanders and Grandpa Simpson.

  • jdm8

    He had trouble remembering a very *simple* name of the book he’s going to rail against? Grey! It’s not one of those “liburl” colors like chartreuse. Take it as a clue and just retire already!

    “I can’t remember the name of the thing I hate, but there’s a detailed litany of reasons why I hate it”

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1094106361 Joshua Allen

    I wish it had been me who supplied the link, but if I see Pat Robertson, I immediately unplug my comp–

  • Nena

    “Struggle with” porn? What does he mean struggle? Like getting too many pop-up ads?

    • The Other Weirdo

       Struggle to build enough storage capacity at home to store it all without consuming so much power the cops raid my place looking for weed. LOL XXX!

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=597605006 Mary Driftwood

       If you really want a (horrifying) laugh, you should read Mark Driscoll’s booklet, “Porn-Again Christian”. The ebook is free online.

    • Michael

      People struggle not to do things that they know they have no reason not to do apart from someone telling them not to.

    • starskeptic

      OMG – that is the funniest thing I’ve read this week!

  • Jackie M

    I really wish a better selection of erotic fiction would get news, even bad news. I am super tired of hearing about this series…

    Also, I guess he’s never heard of Harlequin romance novels? haha

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Judith-Bandsma/1539649418 Judith Bandsma

    Gee, how badly would he shit himself if he knew Ann Rice wrote some of the best female porn even before she wrote those satanic vampire novels and waaaaaay before she turned christian and then stopped being christian again? Of course she wrote under the name A. N. Roquelaure and (horrors) they were 3 BDSM novels pretending to be fairy tales. (Sleeping Beauty theme) In 1983, 1984 and 1985. And compared to those books, the 50 Shades trilogy is a snoozer.

    • ReadsInTrees

       Ann Rice wrote those sleeping beauty books??!! Oh man, I tried to read those a long time ago….never even got through the first once. Anyway, my mind is blown.

  • Gunstargreen

    First of all there’s an entire genre of novels that has existed since nearly the dawn of print that I have a hard time believing he didn’t know about.

    Secondly he knows that women play a PRETTY BIG ROLE in making porn, doesn’t he?

    • allein

      Well clearly those women are all innocent victims who’ve been tricked into it, right?

  • Pisk_A_Dausen

    *snerk* Porn was pretty much one of the first things I looked up when we got an Internet connection at home over 15 years ago. At first out of curiosity and because it was sort-of-kind-of-taboo, but when puberty was through with me a few months later, I suddenly found a whole new use for it. Sorry Pat, I don’t need anyone to tell my libido what to like. It’s pretty vocal and shameless.

  • Mark W.

    How is anything Pat Robertson says shocking anymore.  I would be more shocked if he said something thoughtful and intelligent.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=597605006 Mary Driftwood

    Poor Pat! Someone should tell him about the internet.

  • Stonyground

    As I live in the UK, almost everyone that I know has no interest in religion. Consequently they tend to consider porn as something that is between mildly and intensely pleasurable to look at, or read, and that’s it. Without religion piling a mountain of guilt onto it, you just look at it and say, yeah, that’s nice, and then get on with your day. The notion that having a totally uninhibited attitude toward erotica is an addiction is just laughable. Addiction to drugs can destroy your life. Religious types would like you to believe that having a perfectly healthy attitude toward human sexuality is equivelant to that. In my humble opinion, porn addiction is only a problem to those who are wracked with religion induced guilt.

    I know that the video is a bit amaturish, but this is fun:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-TA57L0kuc

  • Octoberfurst

     That was truly priceless!  When he asked Kristi if there was “anything in porn that attracts her” she looked shocked that he asked and defensively said “No Pat!” and then Pat said that he found porn “boring.’  Boring? Seriously? And it makes me wonder how much porn has he looked at?  LOL
       Poor Pat is shocked–shocked I say—that women actually look at porn. He is apparently under the assumption that women go “Eww, eww, eww” when they see porn and cover their eyes and run away. (Or swoon–take your pick.)  But that is not reality.
        Granted men tend to like to watch people fornicating on film more than women do but a number of women enjoy it. (I myself once had a girlfriend who enjoyed watching porn with me every once in awhile as an enhancement to our lovemaking.) 
       Plus studies have shown that porn in more popular in the Bible belt than anywhere else in America so what does that say about “good Christian values?”

    • Trickster Goddess

      I enjoy some nice erotica now and then, but I must agree that 99% of porn IS boring.

      Pick up any 2 skin mags at random and compare them: it’s all the same airbrushed blandness. When I was a kid I sneaked a look in my Dad’s nightstand drawer and he had one issue each of Playboy, Penthouse, Hustler and Playgirl and kept them for years, never buying any more. When I got old enough to by mags for myself I realized that is all you need since each issue looks pretty much the same.

      As for videos, most of them turn me off. It’s always the same cheesy music, the contrived situations, the stilted dialog, the inevitable look into the camera by the woman and of course, the requisite withdrawal before climax to splooge on her belly. Even most lesbian porn is the same (except for the splooging part) and it always looks like it was directed by and for straight men. All in all, it is very mechanical and there is zero emotional connection between the characters. If I am going to watch people making love, I prefer see some actual loving going on.

      • Raising_Rlyeh

        I have to agree with porn being boring. All porn has the same contrived situations. IDK I’d rather have sex than watch others have sex. 

        • Deven Kale

           I’m amazed at how many people I’m seeing saying that porn is boring. I honestly thought I was the only person alive that wasn’t either excited or disgusted by it. Guess I’m even less the freak that I thought, again. Seems I’m becoming more normal by the day sometimes. lol

          • Raising_Rlyeh

            Well, it’s like playing sports in a way. You can have fun watching others play the sport, but most people enjoy it more to play the game themselves. 

            • Deven Kale

               I think I might have been a little unclear in my first comment. I think it’s boring too. ;)

              • Raising_Rlyeh

                No, you’re comment was perfectly clear. I just felt like adding in a metaphor. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/Tracy.Bradley1 Tracy Bradley

        Another vote for (most) porn being boring – though I did see a hilarious Star Trek porn not long ago, starring a Picard lookalike. But most of it is really uninspired and phony (and how do the female actors not impale themselves on those porn fingernails?)

    • http://gloomcookie613.tumblr.com GloomCookie613

      I like porn more than my husband. Shock! Horror! ;D

  • Michael Koch

    You know, when I was a young boy of 12,  55 years ago, my mother warned me…  Michael, she’d say,  if you don’t stop doing that, you’ll either go blind or go crazy!  Pat Robertson proved the second part of it….  All that ‘jerking off”  to Geebus,  Pat,  has made you crazy!!!!

  • Godlesspanther

    On TV, he asks this woman about her personal level of interest in pornography while leering at her and (was he salivating?) impatient for her answer to the question. 

    I could not imagine doing such a thing. 

    And I’m the one who is supposed to be without a sense of morality. 

  • Dats3

    I saw this the other day at rightwingwatch.org (awesome site btw) while at work. I laughed so loud my office neighbors ran to my office to see what was going on.

  • http://www.imagesandmeanings.com/ Gary Hill

    So Pat, if we live according to your teachings we’ll get to spend eternity with you and the big guy?

    This is not a good deal. Unless you’ve stashed plenty of porn up there.

  • Raising_Rlyeh

    What is this thing you call “porn”? Quickly to the internet to investigate this new phenomenon. 

    • Deven Kale

       NO! Don’t do it! You’ll never be the same again!

  • pagansister

    Good Grief!  Isn’t he dead yet?!    Hard to believe that anyone still listens to him.   

  • Ashton

    When I was at a Christian high school about ten years ago, I always had to snicker to myself at the male teachers who would get up in front of a group of girls during worship time and warn us about the boys.  They would say something to the effect of, “I know what it’s like to be a teenage boy; I was one.  I know what goes on in their heads.  So watch out.”  They clearly had no idea what went on in girls’ heads and what had been going on in mine since I was about 10.

  • http://gloomcookie613.tumblr.com GloomCookie613

    Poor Pat. Just wait until he discovers Rule 34. No exceptions.


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