You Can’t Be Pope, Little Girl

(via Non Sequitur)

About Hemant Mehta

Hemant Mehta is the editor of Friendly Atheist, appears on the Atheist Voice channel on YouTube, and co-hosts the uniquely-named Friendly Atheist Podcast. You can read much more about him here.

  • Claude

    At this rate the cardinals might have to make a girl Pope.

  • Gus Snarp

    That last panel is just full of win.

    Out of curiosity, you usually post an early panel of a comic and make readers click through to the source site, which as a huge fan of online comics with more than a passing interest in seeing their creators able to make a living, I think is a great way to share them. Was this one different simply because the format of the comic prevented you from showing a single panel?

    • Hemant Mehta

      I normally do that. I was in a rush this morning and just did what I could to get this up, providing links to the site along the way. My apologies for the bad netiquette.

  • CelticWhisper

    Implied ageism and sexism aside, I find the use of the word “overqualified” intriguing here. Generally, in an employment context, it’s used to mean “you fit the description of what we need TOO well and we can’t afford to pay you what you’re worth.”

    So does this mean that NOT being indoctrinated is seen as a boon for a pope? My inner cynic says yes – the pope doesn’t believe a word of the bullshit that the church and bible spew out and is just in it for the political power and prestige. I know it’s just supposed to be funny, but it hit on something interesting with that.

    • Witchgawd

      “I know it’s just supposed to be funny”

      Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory just called and he wants his sense of humor back. You just couldn’t refrain from over analyzing and sucking the fun out of it, could you? Must be tough going through life without being able to enjoy even the simplest things in life.

      • CelticWhisper

        What can I say? I’m like Douglas Fargo with big red buttons.

        I analyze – it’s what I do.

        • wmdkitty

          +1 for Douglas Fargo reference.

      • coyotenose

        Meanwhile you’re pitching a fit and making multiple personal attacks because someone dared to enjoy something in a manner of which you did not approve. Must be tough going through life arrogantly raging on people who eat Oreos filling-first.

      • allein

        Sometimes over-analyzing is the fun part.

  • Mary Driftwood

    <3 Danae

  • Arthur Byrne

    Canonically speaking (but leaving aside that she’s a fictional character), those are merely reasons why it’s very unlikely that Danae would be elected pope. The absolute requirements for papal election is a 2/3 vote of the Cardinals in the Conclave… and accepting the job. You don’t have to be a cardinal, bishop, or even priest beforehand — though after accepting, you immediately are a bishop (specifically: the Bishop of Rome), and if you weren’t a bishop before are due to be immediately anointed as one unless you (as absolute earthly monarch of the Church) then decree otherwise. Technically, you don’t even have to be Catholic beforehand, but again become (definitively) so on accepting the job.

    However, given that more than half of the Cardinals were appointed by the relatively conservative Benny #16, that sort of surprise seems quite unlikely. I’d expect that the chances are better for a male member of the Catholic laity being elected than for a woman (of whatever religious background inside or outside the Church).

    Similarly, Danae could also be made the first Empress of the United States, provided she could get a Constitutional Amendment (declaring such) to achieve the requisite 2/3 majority votes of House and Senate (or majority of Constitutional convention of the states) and ratification by 3/4 the state legislatures/conventions. In fact, I suspect the odds on a Popess being elected by the current Conclave are quite a lot lower than on an American Empress from the current Congress.

    Unless someone happens to have access to some Orbital Mind Control Lasers…?

    • CelticWhisper

      If I had access to an orbital laser I could point at Vatican officials, “Mind control” would be about the last thing I’d use it for. More like “weenie roast.”

      • wmdkitty

        Mind control first — make ‘em give all the Vatican’s wealth away to the people who need it most, then the “weenie roast”. (Marshmallows, anyone?)

        • Arthur Byrne

          Basic barbarian rule — pillage, then burn.

          • wmdkitty

            It’s only practical, you know? So many valuables just don’t handle flame very well, especially these days…

    • Highlander

      +1 for the Illuminati game reference

  • Benjamin

    Arthur, you’re not correct. Pope Stephen III held the in the synod of 769 which decreed that only a cardinal priest or cardinal deacon could be elected to the office of the pope.
    As the Catholic Church holds that women cannot be validly ordained, women are not eligible for the papacy.

    • Sven2547

      I don’t see anything in your link supporting what you say, that only Cardinal Priests or Cardinal Deacons can be elected to the office of Pope.

      • Benjamin Cano

        In 769 a council was held under Stephen III to rectify the confusion caused by the intrusion of the antipope Constantine. This usurper was a layman hurriedly raised to priest’s orders to render his nomination to the pontificate possible. To make a repetition of the scandal impossible it was decreed that only members of the sacred college were eligible for election.

        • Sven2547

          The link you just pasted explicitly says that “The pope need not necessarily be taken from the number of cardinals”, although they should if possible.

  • Karen

    I dunno. Danae’s interpretation may just be the correct one.

  • cag

    Soon we will know who is going to be pope Ridiculous CCLXVII.