Christian Right Leader Bryan Fischer: Gay People Are As Immoral As Shoplifters!

Bryan Fischer thinks that “we” (Christians? White guys? D-bags? Who knows) need to reclaim the word discrimination:

So why does the American Family Association spokesman feel that way?

Well, a woman in Ohio was fired by the Catholic school that she taught at when it was revealed in her mother’s obituary that she had a same-sex partner. (You know, ’cause nothing says “God’s Love” like shit-canning a woman after she loses her mother.)

And I don’t mean to shock you, but Fischer thinks that this was the “absolute right” thing to do:

The school discriminated against this teacher, yes they absolutely did and they should have, they were absolutely right to do it…

They were discriminating against this woman’s sexual behavior. Sexual misconduct. Immoral sexual behavior. And we should make no apologies for discriminating against that kind of behavior.

Yeah, I absolutely think that my employers should keep tabs on my sexual behavior, because the quality of my writing can totally be jacked up depending on whether or not I am having sex with a guy or a lady. I can’t even imagine that one’s teaching wouldn’t be affected similarly:

You know, we discriminate against shoplifters. My point is: We discriminate against immoral behavior all the time and we should! So let’s reclaim the discrimination word; it is right to discriminate against people who engage in aberrant sexual behavior.

I would like to make one teensy tiny itty bitty correction if I may. We — society, not your wing-nut followers — discriminate against illegal behavior.

And, yes, there is a lot of overlap between immoral acts and illegal acts (Thanks, sophomore year sociology class! I remember that Venn diagram clearly). But if I think smoking is immoral, I can’t fire someone because I find out they’re a smoker.

Oh, I almost forgot! A woman being married to another woman is not immoral. And it’s really none of your damn business.

Unfortunately, like Fischer, the Catholic school administration is more interested in pleasing a higher power than doing the right thing.

About Jessica Bluemke

Jessica Bluemke grew up in the suburbs of Chicago and graduated from Ball State University in 2008 with a BA in Literature. She currently works as a writer and resides on the North side of Chicago.

  • jdm8

    At least that’s a few steps up from murderers, but… ouch!

  • TiltedHorizon

    Yet Shoplifters can still marry. Go figure.

  • baal

    At least he didn’t compare her to a pedophile. <—that was my first thought. My second thought is that my first though is a good example of why comparisons to worse examples (comparing down) is a bad idea.

    In case you're wondering on the second point, the problem is Fischer's view on the intersection of law and morality and my first point somewhat argues for minimizing how bad Fischer's views are (contextualizing makes sense but unless you're setting a range, compareing down always acts to minimize the bad of an act).

    To go on too long, my mother used to say things like, "at least we didn't beat you with a belt." To which I'd reply, "At least I didn't go on a murder binge, tie you up in the basement and then stab you to death." I probably should have found a better way of objecting but at least I didn't actually do anything violent.

  • Jason Sullivan

    Bryan Fischer must be having some seriously weird gay shoplifting urges

  • Doug Philips

    The douche is strong in this one.

  • Baby_Raptor

    For someone who likes discrimination so much, he sure does whine when he feels he’s being discriminated against. If discrimination is a good thing, then why does he make his paycheck fearmongering people about it?

  • blasphemous_kansan

    Revealing choice of words by Mr. Fischer. A shoplifter is a person who liberates an item from a business establishment, and Fischer seems to be frustrated by current cultural trends where GLBT are successfully liberating their sexuality and identities from the church establishment.

    He seems to think that this phenomena of dismissing the church’s sexual dogma is equivalent to shoplifting, but I think it’s more like recovering stolen property: GLBT are slowly reclaiming their place as equals, which is something that Mr. Fischer and his detestable organization helped to steal.

    Bad shoplifter, Mr. Fischer!

  • jl

    To balance your story, you can google:
    An English professor’s journey from queer theory to Christian faith.
    The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert

  • Sandra Stott

    so long as they are hetero shoplifters. They can’t both shoplift the same store, that would be homoshoplifting.

  • Rain

    Does that guy ever smile? Do any “fundy wingnuts” ever smile? Good grief… so much love…

  • David Benjamin Patton

    Depending on the society or civilization you are referring to 2,000 to 3,000 YEARS of ‘slowly reclaiming’ our place as equals.

  • observer

    Fischer wants to “reclaim” discrimination, yet what do you suppose the odds are that he doesn’t “hate”?

  • blasphemous_kansan

    >>”To balance your story”

    Is it funny to anyone else that whenever anyone expresses an interest in a media story being “Fair and balanced” that it seems to actually be code for “obfuscated and misdirected”?

    Nice job on ‘balancing’ this story with something completely unrelated, though.

  • ribaric

    He has a point about discrimination but that’s the last winning moment he had. He argues it well but then tages on “this woman’s sexual behaviour” as if that was part of his argument. I believe he is well aware of that but porobably thinks there are enough dullards in the world to give him good numerical support. Sadly, I share a surname with him but that’s where the similarity ends.

  • ribaric

    He has a point about discrimination but that’s the last winning moment he had.
    He argues it well but then tags on “this woman’s sexual behaviour” as if that was part of his argument. I believe he is well aware of this but probably thinks there are enough dullards in the world to give him good numerical support. Sadly,
    I share a surname with him but that’s where the similarity ends.

  • Kahomono

    After I married my non-Jewish wife, my Orthodox brother said that the reason he discarded mail from us to his home was that he did not wish to explain to his children how their uncle was so immoral.

    He specifically said it was exactly as if I were a bank-robber and she were a prostitute, and he saw no reason to have to explain that to his tender tots.

  • Kahomono

    You don’t want to see the things that do make them smile, Rain.

  • Kahomono

    At least he didn’t compare her to a pedophile. <—that was my first thought.

    He beat her with a 2×4.

    At least he didn’t shoot her with an RPG.

  • Kengi

    Actually, I think you can legally fire someone for being a smoker. Smokers aren’t a protected class. Just like you can fire someone for being gay in locations where same-sex orientation isn’t a protected class.

    In both cases you’d be a massive asshole for doing so, but I think it’s legal, barring any terms in an employment or union contract. There may also be an employment suit if someone could prove that was just an excuse to hide discrimination based on protected status, like age or race. But otherwise…

  • chicago dyke

    no, you’re not being the same type of asshole, and in fact one could argue that you’re doing a favor for your other employees and customers. smokers bring higher health costs to any workplace, directly and indirectly. it’s better these days, in terms of most workplaces being smoke free. but there are still costs and risks with smoking.

    homosexual partnership has no such risks.

  • Rain

    At least he didn’t look quite as mean when I clicked on the video as he does up there in the snapshot. Still a mean lookin homie though.

  • 3lemenope

    …in fact one could argue that you’re doing a favor for your other employees and customers.

    In fact one could do any number of things. It wouldn’t make any of those things, strictly speaking, advisable. But one could still do them.

    For example, in this case, I don’t think it’s a particularly good idea to argue that the distinction should turn on cost, because it introduces two vulnerabilities. First, if it were to be shown that homosexual partnership did have an actuarial effect (even an indirect one), you’ve argued in essence that it would be OK, then, to discriminate against homosexuals. Worse, and second, it is a direct argument against accommodating those who already demonstrably *would* incur costs as part of their accommodation, such as folks with disabilities.

  • John

    …what does that have to do with the point of this story at all?

  • Baby_Raptor

    Sneaky way to try and proselytize, I guess. The problem is that nobody here is interested in your god or how one person managed enough cognitive dissonance to somehow make Christianity work.

    But whatever, as long as you feel that you showed us, right?

  • Sven2547

    What part of this story is unbalanced?

  • SeekerLancer

    How much do you want to bet he would’ve played the pedophile card if he was talking about a homosexual man?

  • SeekerLancer

    That is entirely unrelated, thanks.

  • Carpinions

    This seems like a generous step up in gay stature from BF almost, since he and other anti-gay bigots usually resort to Nazi and pedophilia references from word 1. Shoplifters? That’s not even felony theft.

    Talk about a back-handed compliment.

  • Carpinions

    That is the typical right wingnut response when asked to think about and/or apologize for rhetoric. Getting called out for “speaking your mind” and “talking straight”? Don’t stop to think, DOUBLE DOWN!!!

    They apply this logic to pretty much anything they stand for these days, which is apparently nothing positive. They think uttering nonsense and then walking through the firestorm nose held high will suddenly make the critics disappear. It’s part of their “gotta break a few eggs” mentality.

  • Raising_Rlyeh

    Besides the fact that two women loving and marrying each other is not immoral I would like to point out that shoplifting can be considered either moral or immoral. It’s the same debate we have about stealing and whether it is moral or immoral to steal to keep your family alive.

    Having said that FUCK Fischer and the @ssholes who compared being gay to being a pedophile, drunk, drug addict, et cetra.

  • allein

    Does all mail they receive require a discussion with the kids about the sender’s moral compass?

  • aoscott

    I was going to bring this up too. It’s not exactly the same, but here in Michigan, one of the biggest hospitals implemented a new policy a year or two ago of no smoking. They drug test their employees for nicotine (I’m not sure if this is just upon hire or a routine test).

    This doesn’t apply to people already working there, but if you’re a new hire, you straight up cannot smoke and work there.

  • Kahomono

    Apparently having to explain that Uncle Abe no longer lives with Aunt Leah, but now is sending mail as Abe & Christine {surname} was enough to freak them out.

  • baal

    arg @ disqus, the “at least he” comment is mine. Fixing a typo in the email seems to have caused me to bounce back to “guest”.

  • BobaFuct

    We also discriminate against speeders. Applying the christian standard of all sin is equal in god’s eyes, Fisher is in big trouble if he EVER goes over the limit…or fails to signal, or yield to a pedestrian. Just because shoplifting may bring a higher punishment or have greater social stigma, doesn’t make it inherently more illegal (and hence, immoral, using Fisher’s logic) than speeding.

  • allein

    Hmm…I gotta say, I really didn’t pay that much attention to my parents’ mail as a kid…

  • guest

    Something something, thou shall not judge others, something something.

  • Mario Strada

    We discriminate against illegal behavior. Shoplifting is a crime, being gay isn’t.

    He has his definitions mixed up.

  • Kevin_Of_Bangor

    Well bringing a huge butt plug up to the counter with the sexy girl behind it can be very embarrassing.

  • Golfie98

    Now that’s funny :)

  • Kengi

    The rule in that hospital is not just making the workplace smoke-free (hospitals have been a smoke-free workplace for many years), but a restriction that you can’t smoke at all. Even when not at work.

    Saying you don’t want your employees to smoke at all because of health cost reasons is similar to saying your employees can’t engage in risky sexual behavior (like not using a condom) when on their own time because of health cost reasons. Or go on ski vacations. Or drive a sports car. Or drink alcohol. Or play sports. Etc…

    Getting too involved in your employee’s private life because of potential health (or other) cost reasons is an asshole move. Period. We tried that in the days of Henry Ford and George Pullman and it was not pretty.

  • kaydenpat

    With Bryan it’s always strong.

  • Carpinions

    If your idea of “balance” is to suggest we read unvarnished, sympathetic propaganda, you need to buy a dictionary. Also, what about what BF says in those clips above needs balancing? The man is an outright bigot. What you’re basically saying is we need to balance honest criticism of the content of what a bigot is saying, with honest consideration of more bigotry from a different person.

    I’ll let you figure out what the problem with that request is.

  • McAtheist

    Those ‘same store’ shoplifters are going to hell.

  • Ayame Sohma

    Reminds me of the asshats Frank Turek (equated being gay with being a sociopath) and Michael L Brown (similar libel).

  • chris suits

    As long as we discriminate by killing all Christians, muslims and any delusional magic beleivers.

  • RRG

    That is not much of a bet when you consider that it was a Catholic Church school that fired the lady in the first place. I am really surprised that he was defending the church school and then condemning Catholics as non-Christian heretics in the same sentence.