If Eminem Were Atheist, He’d Sound Like This

David James Tibbetts blasphemes more in two minutes than most atheists do all day. He does it pretty damn well, too:

Incredulous religiosity, will be met with rational ferocity
Theology is astrology — not a basis for national policy
Double talk, two faced Tautology
Sourced from young earth cosmology
Why are we waiting, debating; they’re legislating and hating
Discriminating, parading, and our rights violating
With constitution pollution by abusing confusion
Using corporate collusion achieving private intrusion
Masquerading, falsely stating, [elating in our] abating
I’ll end this congressional evading, chambers need some ventilating

Someone put that to music so it sounds like Bo Burnham.

(Image via Shutterstock)

About Hemant Mehta

Hemant Mehta is the editor of Friendly Atheist, appears on the Atheist Voice channel on YouTube, and co-hosts the uniquely-named Friendly Atheist Podcast. You can read much more about him here.

  • Saara Wintersgill

    I think I like Eminem a whole lot better.

  • Iothisk

    He has decent rhythm, but desperately needs more tonality. Probably could slow down a little, many words were hard to catch. Eminem this guy is not, at least not yet. Potential is there, though.

  • http://www.atheismandthecity.com/ The Thinker

    Not bad, but he needs music and a bit more rhythm.

  • Rage0n

    Big old pile of poo in my humble opinion!

  • duke_of_omnium

    “Ferocity” and “policy” is a very weak rhyme. Somewhere, Edmund Spenser is turning over in his grave.

  • Lynn

    Thanks for rapping about Atheism.

  • Lurker111

    Things you don’t see:

    1. A character in a play going, “Look! There’s Godot!”

    2. A sign saying “Bottom Soil for Sale.”

    3. A reference to “outfidels.” (Unless we’re talking about Fidel Castro, maybe?)

  • L.Long

    Saying so called blasphemy is impossible. Since no religion as proved itself correct or valid then anything negative is said about nothing more then a comment on a fairy tale. Blasphemy in terms of misuse of gawd’s name is also impossible. What is gawd’s name? NO ONE KNOWS!!! When gawd decides to appear and says my name is ‘xxxx’ then we will know, til then no one knows. jesus is NOT gawd’s name it is jesus’ name, and he is just some dud spitting BS.
    Blasphemy as a civil law is nothing more then a fictional crime against a fictional thing for the purposes of political control by a group of irrational dimwits that need the state to control what is non sense.

  • http://www.DissectingThoughts.com/ DisThoughts

    His lyricism is decent, but his delivery is lacking.

    Also he doesn’t sound like Eminem. That’s not even meant as a criticism. Not all rappers need to sound like Eminem, and it’s sad that Eminem has become the go-to comparison. David James Tibbets sounds more like Gift of Gab or Chuck D just to make a slightly more accurate comparison.


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