Christian Body-Builders Wife-Swap Their Way to Jesus

Thanks, New York Post. Also for the pictures. I think.

A Bible-thumping couple in Florida is changing the way people think about their faith — with a hookup website for devout Christian swingers!

Cristy Parave and her husband, Dean, are the unashamed bodybuilding Jesus lovers bringing couples together and introducing them to their wild lifestyle of swapping sex partners and Bible verses, Barcroft Media reports.

When the fitness gurus got sick of finding swingers online who couldn’t meet their standards, they decided to set up their own swinging network — They have been touring the US ever since, meeting couples who want to join in and indulge in their holy promiscuity.

The couple first met at a bodybuilding competition, and simply don’t care what people say about their swinging. They firmly believe that despite their unfaithful marriages, the big guy upstairs doesn’t have a care in the world that they’re defiling their sacred vows.

“I don’t think God would be mad at what we are doing,” Cristy said. “At first I was conflicted, but the more we looked at it, the more it makes sense to us.”

My favorite quote from this video about the Paraves:

If all the swingers are sinners, what’s the best way to talk to the sinners? To join ’em, right?

Can’t argue with that.

Bonus: If relentless monogamy is more your taste, here are six sex tips from minor Christian TV celebrities Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar, starting with [spoiler alert] “You should always be available for sex,” and ending with “Be fruitful and multiply.” Of course.

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