Tale As Old As Time: Beauty and the Beast Too Gay For Alabama Drive-In

This Thursday, it was revealed that the new live-action Beauty and The Beast contains Disney’s first “exclusively gay moment,” whatever the hell that means. Shockingly, this does not involve the candlestick guy, but rather “LeFou,” a villager who wants not only to be Gaston, but also be with Gaston.

LeFouGay

This should probably not be the biggest deal in the world, given that it’s 2017 and pretty much everyone knows that gay people exist. However, the new owners of the Henagar Drive-In Theatre in Alabama feel that they must boycott showing the movie to prevent their grandchildren from ever discovering that fact.

In a now deleted post on Facebook, owner Carol Laney wrote:

HenagarDriveIn

As of December 16th the Henagar Drive-In is under new ownership. Movies scheduled prior to that date and four weeks after this date were not scheduled by the new owners. That being said… It is with great sorrow that I have to tell our customers that we will not be showing Beauty and the Beast at the Henagar Drive-In when it comes out.

When companies continually force their views on us we need to take a stand. We all make choices and I am making mine. For those that do not know Beauty and the Beast is “premiering” their first homosexual character. The producer also says at the end of the movie “there will be a surprise for same-sex couples”.

If we can not take our 11 year old grand daughter and 8 year old grandson to see a movie we have no business watching it. If I can’t sit through a movie with God or Jesus sitting by me then we have no business showing it.

I know there will be some that do not agree with this decision. That’s fine. We are first and foremost Christians. We will not compromise on what the Bible teaches. We will continue to show family oriented films so you can feel free to come watch wholesome movies without worrying about sex, nudity, homosexuality and foul language. Thank you for your support!

Acknowledging that gay people exist is not a view; it is a fact of life — unlike, may I just note here, anthropomorphic teapots. Also, if you believe in God and Jesus and think they are omnipotent beings constantly watching everything everyone is doing at all times, don’t you think they’ve probably seen Beauty and the Beast by now? After all, what’s the fun in being an All-knowing God if you don’t get to see movies before everyone else, right?

Laney, by the way, is a 56-year-old woman who claims she does not watch any movies that an 8-year-old or a 10-year-old couldn’t watch with her. Or rather, suggests that we have no business watching a movie that children that age couldn’t watch. Which I think would eliminate most movies that are not cartoons — in addition to everything else that occurs in a drive-in movie theater… So good luck with that new business. Somehow, Laney thinks it makes sense to have a drive-in where most of your clientele cannot actually stay up late enough to watch the movies that you are showing. (Or, um, drive.)

She elaborated on her views in a phone interview with New York Times reporter Sopan Deb:

Laney says that she was “super excited” when she first heard the movie was coming out, because what could be a better lesson for her grandchildren than learning to find love and romance by way of Stockholm Syndrome, right? She assumed it would be, like most movie musicals, strictly for heterosexuals. But as soon as she discovered that there was A GAY in the movie, she wanted nothing to do with it at all. “What is this ‘surprise’ for same-sex couples?” she wondered. Is it anal sex? Well, it is a Disney movie for children, so probably.

According to Laney, she has family members she loves who are gay — which, of course, makes it utterly impossible for her to be a bigot. I presume this also means her precious grandchildren also have family members they love who are gay. Whatever will she do when they find out?!? What if Jesus and God are visiting at the time? How will she manage?

(via Towleroad)

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