Last week, Pastor Lance Wallnau told the world that he knew of a man who was “cured” of his homosexuality because he ate a special piece of cake.
As Wallnau told it, there were some “hookers” who used to hang out at a bar who were saved by a fellow patron who had found Christianity. Together, Wallnau said, these individuals “baked a cake for the owner of the bar, who was gay and very adamantly anti-Christian” and prayed over it that he would leave homosexuality.
“It was an anointed cake,” Wallnau said, “and they made the cake and gave it as a gift. And when he ate the cake … the power of God hit him.”
The “presence of God” fell upon the bar owner, Wallnau recounted, and he then got baptized, at which point “the spirit that was working him got broken off,” thus freeing him from his life of homosexuality.
Wallnau didn’t mention the name of the bar, the name of the bar owner, or show us the Gay Card the man had to turn back in when he changed his sexual orientation. But he’s a Christian, so we’re supposed to believe him. That’s how it works.
Now, however, Wallnau is furious that people are quoting him verbatim, making him look like a damn fool.
The actual story, which appears in Transformation: Change The Marketplace and You Change the World by Ed Silvoso — and which should still be taken with a huge grain of salt — is that a gay bar manager was “saved” by a Christian. To celebrate, he made a cake for the bar’s owner… who ate it, got “saved” himself, and then converted the bar into a church.
It’s still a ridiculous story… but nothing in there suggests the gay person stopped being gay because he ate cake, which is precisely what Wallnau said last week.
That’s why, in his latest video, he apologized for spreading the misinformation and explained how cake will not change someone’s sexual orientation.
… I’m just kidding.
Wallnau criticized the publications that quoted him directly and called them all “fake news.”
Despite the fact that it was Wallnau who got the story wrong and that the media was simply reporting what he had originally said, Wallnau is now bizarrely claiming that he was misquoted.
“So you see, they were not quoting me correctly in The Huffington Puffington Post,” Wallnau declared, “because the guy didn’t get delivered … Ex-gay guy ends up getting delivered by water baptism, not by the cake. This is what the liberals do, they always misquote you. Get it straight!”
“They got hung up on the cake,” he stated, “which was actually [the owner], not a homosexual. Once again, fake news from The Huffington Puffington Post and the Dallas News and one thousand Twitter feeds!”
I’m struggling to understand how they misquoted him when the original video is right there for everyone to see…
But that’s religious people for you: When the evidence isn’t there, they insist we accept their beliefs on faith. When the evidence is there, they deny it.