About Rachel Ford

Rachel Ford is a programmer, and since 8:00 to 5:00 doesn't provide enough opportunity to bask in screen glare, she writes in her spare time. She was raised a very fundamentalist Christian, but eventually "saw the light." Rachel's personal blog is Rachel's Hobbit Hole, where she discusses everything from Tolkien to state politics.

The Company Behind Pokémon Go is Inadvertently Sending a Lot of Players to Church

If you play Pokémon Go, then there’s a good chance you’ll end up at church.

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Heidi Cruz Says Her Husband’s Loss Was God Working On His Own Time… Just Like With Slavery

In general, I think it’s bad form to target a political figure’s spouse for criticism or ridicule. Even when they say or do moderately dumb things, they are not, after all, the candidate, so they deserve a much more generous approach and less scrutiny than someone who wants to represent us.

I say “in general,” because every once in a while, a political spouse will do something so utterly, breathtakingly stupid that you can’t just ignore it. Like, for instance, comparing her spouse’s failed presidential run to the fight for emancipation.

That’s what Heidi Cruz did the other day when addressing her husband’s campaign’s “National Prayer Team”:

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Glenn Beck: God Must Punish America for Choosing Donald Trump Because That’s What Good Dads Do

Just last week, it became clear that Donald Trump had finally won the Republican Game of Thrones. Since then, we’ve been treated to a frenzy of hand-wringing from the #NeverTrump crowd — with many Republican leaders wondering how decades of racist dog whistles, misogynistic policies, and anti-intellectualism could possibly have culminated in the rise of a buffoonish, xenophobic, misogynist who proudly yells the things generally just hinted at by the party. It’s a mystery, truly.

The other wing of the #NeverTrump crowd, of course, is not mourning the embrace of radical positions; they’re mourning the loss of another xenophobic, anti-woman, anti-immigrant demagogue: Ted Cruz. After months of his family repeatedly assuring supporters that a Cruz presidency was ordained by God, they’re finally coming to terms with the fact that it isn’t. Or wasn’t. (Whichever interpretation is preferred. It doesn’t make a difference.) And while some are managing their grief well, some are… well, some are Glenn Beck.

According to Beck, Cruz’s defeat means God has to punish us. He must. America is a petulant child, and God is a good dad who has done everything he can to make us obey. And now? Now Dad has no choice but to carry through on our threatened spanking. (Spanking seems to be a theme for the Cruz camp.)

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Christian Quiverfull Leader Hosts Retreat to Arrange Marriages for Kids, All Without Their Consent

Vyckie Garrison has an article up at Raw Story detailing a stomach-turning scheme from Quiverfull patriarch Vaughn Ohlman. Ohlman is setting up a “Get Them Married” retreat for fathers to arrange marriages for their teenage children — without their consent.

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Donald Trump Has Won the Republican Game of Thrones

In real-life Game of Thrones, it’s been a busy few days for the Kingdom of the States United.

In the far reaches of Indiana, the forces of the Lannister-like Evil Overlord from the Gilded Hall (who has his own Lannister-esque interest in his female offspring) vanquished the combined armies of the Lord of Ohio and the Dark Priest from Texas. It wasn’t until the Evil Overlord took the Priest’s head, though, that the Lord of Ohio surrendered, dashing the last hopes of those that resisted the reach of the Gilded Hall.

Now, one by one, the vanquished are falling in line to pledge their loyalty to the orange victor…

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