Faith Healer Benny Hinn Is Admitted to Intensive Care For Heart Problems

Irony alert:

Televangelist Benny Hinn was admitted to the intensive care unit in an Orange County, California hospital this weekend after suffering heart problems in Brazil last week. The 63-year-old healing evangelist is expected to make a full recovery, but recognizes that he may have overdone it during a week-long crusade in South America.

“This is a challenge, but I’m getting good reports,” Hinn told Charisma News. “We don’t have all the answers … as we get older, our bodies need repair.”

In other news, Benny Hinn has a heart.

That’s kinda odd for a pious charlatan who has no problem doing this:

At one Hinn service a woman — hearing the evangelist’s anonymously directed command to “stand up out of that wheelchair!” — struggled to do so for almost half an hour before finally sinking back, exhausted.



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Afghan Cleric and Cop Defend Mob That Stomped Woman To Death… But She Turns Out To Be Innocent

Last week, a seething mob in Kabul, Afghanistan, beat and stomped a 27-year-old woman named Farkhunda to death. The attackers, whose extreme brutality was caught on camera, felt not just justified, but obligated, because they’d heard that Farkhunda had burned a Qur’an.

Now we learn that a local imam and a police spokesman both support the killing:

An Afghan cleric and a police official … defended the lynching of a woman in central Kabul after a mob was filmed stamping on the woman and smashing a brick on her head after she was accused of burning a Koran, Islam’s holy book. …

[A]t a mosque in … Kabul, a cleric’s sermon broadcast by loudspeaker told devotees that the crowd had a right to defend their Muslim beliefs at all costs. “I am warning the government not to arrest those who did this, because it will mean an uprising,” said the cleric at the Wazir Akbar Khan mosque.

At least one Kabul-based law-enforcement official is on the same page:

A spokesman in the Kabul police chief’s office also appeared to justify the killing, saying the woman had deliberately insulted Islam. “This (person) thought, like several other unbelievers, that this kind of action and insult will get them U.S. or European citizenship. But before reaching their target, lost their life,” Hashmat Stanekzai wrote on his Facebook page.



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Mistake in Reciting Qur’an Leads to Caning and Hospital Visit for 10-Year-Old Boy

To Train Up a Child, special Islamic version:

An imam in Uttar Pradesh punished a 10-year-old boy with 170 push ups and then caned him, after he failed to recite a chapter from Quran correctly. The boy had to be treated in hospital after the beating. … The cleric beat the boy with a cane and sat on him, when he was unable to complete the press-ups due to exhaustion, the Times of India reported. The boy was admitted to hospital afterward.



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Meth-Dealing Priest and Money Launderer Kevin Wallin Would Like a Light Sentence, Please

If Father Kevin Wallin had peed in the baptismal font, smoked kush in the confessional, and humped a life-size crucifix, his bosses and parishioners would probably only be half as shocked as they are by what Wallin really did do.

Wallin, now 63 years old, was formerly the priest at St. Augustine Parish in Bridgeport, Connecticut, but was suspended in May of 2013 after church authorities say they learned that the pastor was engaging in gay sex in the church rectory. He also had a habit of dressing in women’s clothes, according to reports at the time.

But that pales next to the meth-dealing and money-laundering.

The out-of-control priest allegedly laundered his excess drug cash [from the sale of methamphetamine] by investing in a local business.

Liquor store? Car wash? Nope.

Sex shop.



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It’s a Miracle! Vatican Claims Coagulated “Blood” of St. Gennaro Liquefies After Pope Francis Kisses the Vial

The Catholic network Aleteia is named after the Greek word for truth, so this report must be totally truthful:

 The blood relic of St. Gennaro [a.k.a. Januarius], patron saint of Naples, [yesterday] miraculously liquefied in the presence of Pope Francis, the first time the miracle has occurred in the presence of a pontiff since 1848.

His blood has half-liquefied,” the Archbishop of Naples, Cardinal Crescenzio Sepe, said at the conclusion of Pope Francis’ address to diocesan priest and religious in the city’s cathedral. “It’s a sign that St. Gennaro loves the Pope, who is neapolitan like us.”



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