Back in 2007, Ms. Walden’s employer, C0mputer Sciences Corporation, (CSC) held a contract with the CDC under which it provided counseling services to CDC employees. The issue arose when a CDC employee who was in a long-term same-sex relationship came to Ms. Walden for counseling. During the intake session, the employee (referred to as “Jane Doe” in the opinion) told Ms. Walden about serious and emotionally disturbing issues in her relationship. In response, Ms. Walden told her that her “personal values” prevented her from effectively counseling Ms. Doe, and provided a referral. During that intake session, Ms. Walden never mentioned the source of those personal values, her Christian faith.

Ms. Doe then filed a complaint to Ms. Walden’s superiors, saying that she felt “judged and condemned” by what Ms. Walden had said.  Her immediate supervisor did not take issue with the referral itself. (And neither do I — I’d rather not have LGBT people in a patient/counselor relationship with someone like that).

The program supervisor, Doug Shelton, discussed the incident with Ms. Walden and told her that the implicit judgment in telling a patient that her “personal values” prevented her from counseling the patient was not acceptable.

Ms. Walden rejected suggestions that she give potential clients who are in same-sex relationships some other reason for her referral. At the trial court level, she insisted that

it seemed unfair that [Ms. Doe] was able to talk aboutbeing gay and lesbian, and yet I couldn’t freely talk about me and my religious beliefs, or being Christian . . . . To me, it’s about honesty.  If she can be honest – I mean, I should be honest about why I’m transferring her.

The court held that

undisputed facts inthe record show that Dr. Chosewood and Ms. Zerbe asked for Ms. Walden’s removal from the contract because of how she handled Ms. Doe’s referral and because they believed Ms. Walden would not alter her behavior in similar circumstances in the future, not because of her religious views or her need to refer clients for religious reasons.

Her superiors did not burden her religious exercise by instructing her not to tell patients that she disapproved of their sexuality. Ms. Walden never claimed that her religious beliefs required her to be honest with her patients about her values. (Which is ironic, since “don’t lie” is actually in there). Her sincere religious belief that she would be condoning same-sex relationships by counseling people who were involved in them was not burdened.

It appears that absolutely no one told her she had to counsel people in same-sex relationships, nor does it appear that she was penalized in any way for deciding to refer those patients to another counselor. I would give my opinion here about why it’s so reprehensible for a counselor to express judgment like that when someone comes to her in need, but Dr. Casey Chosewood, CDC’s Project Officer for Occupational Health and Preventive Services, says it beautifully:

There again, I feel like that statement has some — has some bias in it, it has some judgmental tone in it.  There are many people who believe that homosexuality is like eye color or color of skin, you know.  There’s good science that supports that, as well.  I would not be happy with her saying something like, you know, “My personal belief doesn’t allow me to see someone of your color.”  To me, that’s — it’s just not appropriate in that very vulnerable setting when patients are coming to you maybe at their neediest time. So I feel like a referral, perfectly fine.  And — but to share, to give any, really, sort of expression of judgment or of displeasure with someone else’s situation or choices or life, to me, is not — it does not further the therapeutic relationship in any way.

Because the court concluded that Ms. Walden was laid off (and given instructions how to get another job within the agency) for reasons separate from her free exercise rights, it dismissed her claim. Her attorneys are considering appealing the U.S. Supreme Court, saying “[a] counselor who is a Christian shouldn’t lose her job for upholding the highest professional standards.”

For a fact-selective recounting of the events that is heavy on martyrdom, but light on law, check out this video presentation by Family Research Council:

In spite of the fact that the court viewed all the facts in the light most favorable to Ms. Walden, it still dismissed her free exercise claims. She also made a claim against CSC.

Under the contract it held with the CDC to provide counseling services to the CDC employees, CSC was required to discharge an employee at the request of the CDC. It did as it was contractually obligated to do when it laid her off. In doing so, the court held that it did not substantially burden Ms. Walden’s sincerely held religious beliefs.

The court further held that CSC didn’t violate Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964 because it provided her with a reasonable accommodation when it offered to allow her to give a different reason for referral. And then again when it encouraged her to find alternate employment with the company. If she had done this within one year, she would even have kept her seniority.

Interestingly, the court relied on a very similar case, Bruff v. North Mississippi Health Services.

There, the court held that

the defendant hospital fulfilled its obligation to accommodate the plaintiff counselor’s religiously-based refusal toprovide same-sex relationship counseling when it gave her thirty days to find another position at the hospital and provided her with the assistance of its in-house employment counselor.

The rulings seem pretty reasonable to me. If the clients aren’t harmed by being referred out to another counselor, then everyone can be happy. Counselors don’t have to violate their religious beliefs that they can’t counsel LGBT people, and LGBT get a counselor that really has their best interests in mind. It’s entirely appropriate for a federal employer to terminate a counselor that it believes will use her position to pass judgment on people whose sexuality she disapproves of. I’m glad to see the courts standing up for that principle, especially when it’s founded in so much legal precedent.

It’s a series of short responses to the prompt “When I came out…”

Some of them are funny. Some are frustrating. Some are heartbreaking. But in all cases, there’s a common thread: If you’re still in the closet about your sexuality, know that there are other people going through the same thing. You’re not alone. There’s a lot of support for you out there.

And it all takes place in Michele Bachmann‘s district.

You might want some tissues…

“This isn’t something you kid about, Brittany,” her mom scolded, snatching the kitchen cordless and taking it down the hall to call the Johnsons. A minute later she returned, her face a mask of shock and terror. “Honey, I’m so sorry. We’re too late,” she said tonelessly as Brittany’s knees buckled; 13-year-old Sam had climbed into the bathtub after school and shot herself in the mouth with her own hunting rifle. No one at school had seen her suicide coming.

No one saw the rest of them coming, either.

…

With the adults thus distracted by endless policy discussions, the entire district became a place of dread for students. Every time a loudspeaker crackled in class, kids braced themselves for the feared preamble, “We’ve had a tragic loss.” Students spoke in hushed tones; some wept openly in the halls. “It had that feeling of a horror movie – everyone was talking about death,” says one 16-year-old student who broke down at Anoka High School one day and was carted off to a psychiatric hospital for suicidal ideation. Over the course of the 2010-2011 school year, 700 students were evaluated for serious mental-health issues, including hospitalizations for depression and suicide attempts…

It’s a tragic story, made worse by the fact that the people who could’ve done something for these kids were forced to remain silent (or, more euphemistically, “neutral”) when it came to the issue of homosexuality.

Even if you’re an anti-gay Christian “family” group, there’s a way to respond to an article like this.

You start by saying that the losses were tragic. That your heart goes out to the families of those children who felt there was no other option. That, despite your disagreements, every life is precious. That while you firmly oppose “promoting” homosexuality, there’s a difference between a clash of ideas and actual harassment.

I’m not saying I would accept that statement even if a Christian group made it, but at least it’d show an inkling of compassion…

So how did the Illinois Family Institute — a Christian group in the same vein as the Minnesota Family Council mentioned in the article — respond to the piece?

Well, let’s just say Laurie Higgins didn’t take my advice:

These activists pretend their ultimate goal is to end bullying, but only the naïve or ignorant believe that whopper. The truth is that they are exploiting legitimate anti-bullying sentiment in order to implement their politicized anti-bullying programs, all in the service of achieving their ultimate goal: the eradication of conservative moral beliefs about homosexuality.

If they can’t achieve that doctrinaire goal, they will reluctantly settle for bullying conservatives into silence. They will accept an America in which it is politically, legally, or socially impossible for conservatives to express the moral beliefs homosexual activists can’t eradicate, leaving homosexuals and their allies free to gambol about the public square with all their First Amendment rights intact.

…

Clearly, Erdely is not concerned with ending teen suicide. Her mission, pursued with messianic fervor, is to humiliate conservatives into submission by any unethical means necessary. Christians in Minnesota and other school districts around the country must not cower in fear.

Right. Because the Christian groups are the real victims here… How *dare* those liberals try to take away our right to tell gay people how worthless they are and why they need to be fixed? Why can’t they just have more tolerance for intolerance?

Higgins also spends time rationalizing all the awful events mentioned in the article. As if everything is negated because a few details weren’t included. This one may be the most disturbing:

Not once did Erdely suggest that the bullies were Evangelicals or motivated by Evangelical beliefs about homosexuality, which, by the way, are simply orthodox Christian beliefs widely held by the finest contemporary Protestant and Catholic theologians as well virtually all theologians in the history of Christendom until the late 20th Century.

Yeah! There’s no proof Christians were the bullies! Even though the “finest” Christian theologians of our time totally agree with the bullies’ beliefs…

Incidentally, the Rolling Stone article mentions a Naperville, Illinois high school. It happens to be the one I work at… Despite the context given in the piece, I feel like we provide a safe climate for LGBTQ students. If there was ever a problem in our school like the one at Anoka High School, I have no doubt many teachers and administrators would come to the defense of the victims and not the bullies. I know I would.

Too bad the “compassionate” Christian groups can’t do the same thing.

The band, Bye June, conveys the message via shadow puppets and swans. The obstacle to the swans’ love? Not a surprise…

The lead singer/songwriter, Gil Kline, said this about the video:

“I wrote this song because my cousin is in 10 year relationship and he can’t marry his partner. They are so in love, and it angers me that politicians try to tell other people who to love and spend their life with”.

Damn right.

There’s a Facebook page dedicated to the Swan Pride movement and the stories on the wall (scroll down for them) are absolutely inspirational.

(Thanks to Paul for the link!)

He recently released this video promising to fight against House Joint Resolution No. 6, which would limit marriage to that between a man and woman only:

As if I needed another reason to love Rupert…

His campaign site is here, in case you’d like to bask in his awesomeness.

(Thanks to Ron for the link!)

As easily as that, I began to identify as an ally. I went on to intern at the Family Equality Council & worked a legislative assistant on civil rights, including LGBT equality, during my time at the Religious Action Center after college. I’ve served as managing editor of Fusion, an LGBT issues magazine, marched in a pride parade, & have just generally done my best to work for equality whenever possible. I have a really difficult time respecting differences of opinion when it comes to civil rights. I do my best to be respectful of other people’s views, but it’s really hard for me to see any other side here. As I see it, it’s as basic as treating people fairly, & I just can’t see any other side to that.

When I learned this month that my hometown gym, the city-owned Natatorium, is discriminating against same-sex couples in their membership options, I quickly signed onto a petition asking them to change their policies. Then, I shot off a Facebook message to Shane, the guy behind the petition, asking how I could help. Shane attempted to get a couples pass for himself & his new husband & was turned away, told their marriage “isn’t real” despite the fact that they were legally married four months ago in Washington, D.C. His husband, Coty, is a disabled Iraq Wat veteran who uses the Natatorium for water therapy; Shane is his caretaker.

Kate got word out about the discrimination and the story began popping up on some major websites. Thousands of people signed the online petition and you should, too. Many have written messages of disappointment on the Natatorium’s Facebook page. There are also plans to call the Mayor’s Office en masse this Tuesday and 200+ people have already signed up to do that.

All this because Kate had the inspiration to do something about a troubling situation and she took advantage of the tools at her disposal to share her message with a wider audience. She also had the courage to publicly speak out on a potentially controversial subject — but she didn’t care because civil rights for all people shouldn’t be an issue.

We love praising activists. But let’s be clear: Anyone can do what they do. It takes a lot of courage and a little bit of knowledge about how to get your message out. But if you’re sure you’re doing the right thing, it’s not as hard as it seems.

This is why projects like the OUT Campaign, atheist bloggers/writers/speakers — hell, anyone who lists their religion on Facebook as “Atheist” — are so important in our movement. If you can be open and comfortable about your (non-)religious beliefs, it won’t be as hard to take the next step and speak out when a politician says we’re a “Christian nation” or there’s an injustice regarding church/state separation.

Praying Hands, a 60' by 30' bronze sculpture modeled after Oral Roberts

But Potts is not a part of that world. He is openly gay and describes himself as “godless.” And he is not the first member of the Roberts clan to choose a different path, either. In a letter featured in the book It Gets Better: Coming Out, Overcoming Bullying, and Creating a Life Worth Living, he tells the sad story of Oral’s oldest son, his uncle Ronnie.

My uncle, Ronald David Roberts, was born in 1945, the oldest son of the late televangelist, Oral Roberts, my grandfather. My Uncle Ronnie, like me, was gay. He wrote in letters, published after his death, that he “came out” in high school, but only to close friends and family, including his father. His father, Oral Roberts, was the first televangelist, and likely the most famous faith-healer since Jesus Christ, with a worldwide audience in the hundreds of millions. He did not want a gay son. Oral’s anti-homosexual rants were so vehement that they can still be found on YouTube, forty years later. In his thirties, six months after getting divorced and coming out, my Uncle Ronnie died, on June 10^th, 1982, by a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the heart.

I have lived in Tulsa, Oklahoma, the site of Oral Roberts University and the ministries associated with it, for the majority of my life. My grandfather, my father, and one of my uncles worked at the school in the 1980s. One of my sisters received two ORU degrees along with her husband. I socialized with some of her college friends when he I was in high school. I heard all kinds of stories about the Roberts family growing up (few of them flattering), but this is one that I missed.

The news reports from 1982 about Ronald Roberts’ suicide do not mention his sexuality.

Roberts, 37, died from a single .25-caliber gunshot wound to the heart, Osage County Sheriff George Wayman said.

A passer-by found the Tulsa evangelist’s son slumped in his car, parked on an Osage County road about 15 miles northwest of Tulsa.

Wayman said the bullet wound that killed Roberts appeared to be self-inflicted. He said no note or letter was discovered with the body, but “two or three” notes were found in Roberts’ apartment at 4309 S. Owasso Ave.

Wayman declined to discuss in detail the contents of the notes. But he said although none of the notes mentioned suicide, they left the impression Roberts intended to take his own life.

Oral Roberts claimed that the his son’s service in Vietnam changed him, and that the tragedy made him ”more determined than ever” to pursue his ministry.

In an essay published in This Land, a bi-weekly alternative newspaper in Tulsa, Potts recounts how difficult it was to grow up gay and fearful of damnation. He writes about being a 7^th grader in 1987, when Oral made national news by holding a vigil in the Prayer Tower on Campus, claiming that if he did not raise $8 million for medical missions, “God will call me home.”

I was twelve, my grandfather was in a tower, and I was worried about the rapture, but I was also a seventh-grade gay kid in an evangelical Christian middle school, trying my best to develop crushes on girls. There was one girl I asked out every single day for a month and she said no every time, until it became a sort of joke and I asked her the way I scratched my nose, that is, quickly and sharply. And why did I ask her every day? Because my best friend at the time, a boy I haven’t seen since 1988 but still remember his full name and telephone number… had kissed this girl. I think I was hoping that, if I kissed her too, I would somehow get some of his germs. Or something like that. None of this was conscious, but looking back it’s the only way I can make sense of it. Because, looking back, while I romanced the girls I ended up being nothing but a pest, stealing their lunch bags, undoing their bra as a joke, etc.–all I was really interested in were boys.

Potts adult life followed a pattern familiar to many gay men raised in religious environments. He met a nice woman, married her at a young age, and had children with her. He was only postponing a full acknowledgement of the truth, as he explains in the It Gets Better letter.

It all started for me one summer afternoon when I was twenty-seven years old, and I stood in my kitchen and said to myself, out loud, that I was gay. It was the most liberating feeling I’ve ever had, and for the next three days I was on top of the world. But then reality came crashing down on me — I was married, with children, and I didn’t know what being gay would mean in terms of my family, my wife, my children. It was a horrible place to be. It took a few more years of being scared to death and going to two different therapists before I finally decided that the best thing for everyone involved was for me to get divorced and come out. I had been suicidal for years, and I eventually realized that my children needed a father who wanted to live, who looked forward to tomorrow, and the only way I could be that man was to get divorced and come out.

That’s when I started writing my letter to my uncle, because I felt like he was the only one who would understand. My parents didn’t understand, most of my friends didn’t understand — it was something I didn’t know how to explain, so I started writing.

He came close to ending his life the way his Uncle Ronnie, who was also divorced and a father of young children, did. But he managed to make a better life for himself, and now he’s doing admirable work trying to get his message out to the many gays and lesbians in evangelical communities.

He now lives in Dallas and hopes to write a book about his experiences (I know I would read it). He and his boyfriend, Keaton  Johnson, are currently taking an installation called “The Gay Agenda” on tour. It’s designed to show Americans just how mundane and normal the lives of gay couples can be. It consists of Potts and Johnson sitting on a couch, watching TV and vacuuming.

Potts and his boyfriend perform "The Gay Agenda" in Dallas

It would easier for preachers to denounce the idea of homosexuality as something that happens somewhere else, in godless coastal cities, by people that the churchgoers of middle-America are unlikely to ever meet. Potts is helping change that by forcing Christians to acknowledge that gays and lesbians are born in places like Texas and Oklahoma, into even the most devout families. While some pastors speak out against homosexuality using falsehoods or a Holy Book, Potts is showing them an image of gay couples consisting of two men on a couch, having a pleasant conversation, sharing love and companionship. In other words, they’re really not unlike the rest of us.

The House ran out of time last year to consider addressing this bill, but Republican representative Joey Hensley, who is sponsoring the bill, told the Associated Press that he expects it will advance out of committee this year. It was expected to be heard in the House Education Subcommittee on January 18^th, but was “delayed when some members of the committee said they needed more time to understand its implications.”

Let me point out some of those implications for you…

Last Friday in Tennesee, 14–year-old Phillip Parker committed suicide due to ongoing bullying and harassment that he experienced daily at his local school because he was gay.

“That’s my son,” the boy’s father, [also named] Phillip Parker, told local news station WSMV. “I love him. I miss him. He shouldn’t have had to kill himself to be brought to life.”

According to News Channel 5 reports, Phillip’s suicide note read, “Please help me Mom.” This brought tears to my eyes and makes my heart ache…for his parents, for the torturous thought of ever losing my own child, and for all the children that suffer daily because of ignorance and hate.

This is the second teen suicide in two months in Middle Tennessee and sadly, I don’t know if it will be the last.

After the bill’s reemergence, Jonathan Cole, president of the Tennessee Equality Project, said he got loads of inquiries from people who planned to attend the subcommittee hearing to ensure their side was heard. But even with the bill’s delay, the group warned its Facebook followers that “deferral does not mean that we are out of the woods. The threat of this bill remains.”

Surprise, surprise, the school has denied a recent proposal for such a group. In fact, it’s the fourth time the school has “denied or discouraged” a gay-straight alliance group from forming.

Now, there’s a petition to overturn the university’s decision created by Alex Cooper:

For over a year, Pepperdine’s administration has been in negotiations with the students of Reach OUT, an unrecognized gay-straight alliance, in an effort to promote inclusivity toward LGBT students.

Pepperdine students often struggle to be honest about their sexual orientation because they fear rejection from their peers as well as the risk of losing their scholarships and leadership opportunities. Moreover, professors do not feel comfortable speaking on the issue, worrying that they will be denied tenure or research grants.

Until now, the university’s policies have created an atmosphere of silence and anxiety that alienates not only the LGBT student population but also anyone concerned for their well-being…

…

Administrators are concerned that recognition of Reach OUT would “imply to many that Pepperdine is not honoring our affiliation with the Churches of Christ,” according to a statement released by the Office of Student Affairs. Reach OUT’s mission, however, is not antithetical to the religious mission of the university. In fact, we respect and reinforce it.

This shouldn’t even be an issue. As the petition indicates, the groups isn’t endorsing anything the church would be ashamed of — unless admitting that gay students exist on campus goes against some Commandment Against Accepting Reality.

Please consider signing the petition. If you’re a Pepperdine student or a Christian, you should mention that, too.

Incidentally, last year, LGBT students at Harding University (another school with a Churches of Christ affiliation) released an online magazine where they spoke out anonymously about their sexuality.

(Thanks to Caroline for the link!)

(In response to this post.)