I’ve always been a huge fan of Girl Scout cookies because I am an all-American, red-blooded, gun-toting, God-fearing… wait… I got carried away somewhere in there. Anyway, Tagalongs are my jam and (true story) last year I had Thin Mints for the first time when a coworker flipped out because I had never had one. (My excuse was that I’m not a fan of mint… I was wrong. I love mint. The thinner, the better.)
But I digress. A few years ago, I became aware that the Girl Scouts of America not only manufacture amazing snacks, but are also a pretty kick-ass organization — and more or less the anti-Boy Scouts.
And the reasons that I think GSA is pretty awesome — they’re supportive of the LGBTQ community, they don’t enforce religious ideals, they promote smart sex education, they piss off right-wingers, etc. — are the very reasons that Pastor Kevin Swanson haaaaaaaaaaates them.
So, in an effort to save us all from accidentally supporting babies getting abortions or whatever, Swanson went on a radio show to explain (read: rant like a crazy person) how people who buy Girl Scout cookies are supporting Planned Parenthood, abortion and (obviously) lesbianism: