If you have a vagina, and it could break into a monologue (thank you, Eve Ensler), it would probably ask you to keep it away from vagina steam baths.
And that’s despite what actress Gwyneth Paltrow tells you to do.
Ms. Paltrow loves to get a V-steam. In her lifestyle newsletter GOOP, she swoons:
“You sit on what is essentially a mini-throne, and a combination of infrared and mugwort steam cleanses your uterus, et al. It is an energetic release — not just a steam douche — that balances female hormone levels. If you’re in L.A., you have to do it.”
(Of course: L.A., the lala-land of butthole bleaching. Big surprise. I remember being there years ago and seeing ads for something called “laser vaginal rejuvenation.” But I digress.)
From Laura Hooper Beck at Fast Company, we learn that
Tikkun Holistic Spa in Santa Monica offers the V-steam in many forms to cure whatever ails your aching vag. Suffering from postpartum depression? TIKKUN POST PARTUM V STEAM™. Want to get pregnant? TIKKUN INFERTILITY V STEAM™. Or simply looking to shed a few pounds? TIKKUN SLIMMING V STEAM™. They even offer the V-steam for men, which is more of an A-steam, if you catch my drift. (It’s for your butt.)