What Do Anti-Vaxxers Have to Say About the Latest Study Debunking Their Beliefs?

A major new study, published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) on Tuesday, found no connection between the MMR vaccine and autism, even in high-risk kids.

But until someone gets a statement from Jenny McCarthy, let’s see what the Onion‘s panelists have to say:



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If These Guys Can’t Find Bigfoot, No One Can

A couple of guys went on the search for Bigfoot/Sasquatch and produced this documentary that looks and sounds real… until you pay close attention to what they’re saying.



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COSMOS: A SpaceTime Odyssey Wins Peabody Award

Back in August, we learned that COSMOS: A SpaceTime Odyssey won an impressive 4 Emmy Awards, including “Outstanding Writing For Nonfiction Programming.”

Today, they received an even more impressive honor: The Peabody Award, celebrating overall excellence in quality. (For those unfamiliar with it, this is one of those awards the winners will mention even in short biographies. It’s a big deal.)

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Salon Writer Says We Should Stop Criticizing Astrology; Here’s Why He’s Wrong

Eric Adams considers himself a “man of science,” but doesn’t want to be a dick about it to astrology believers. That alone isn’t a bad idea — it’s hard to change minds by insulting people. In a piece for Salon, he shared how how he’s learned to strike a balance… but it quickly took a strange direction:

I have very few buttons people can press that will elicit any sort of knee-jerk reaction. Actually, I only have one: Astrology… The subject strikes a nerve because my main avocation happens to be astronomy. You know, the actual science.

When I thought about it, I quickly realized that similar low-level intolerance crops up other places in my life, as well…

So where do I get off being such a dismissive shit?

It’s the equivalent of dismissing entire religions, which just isn’t like me.

Let’s stop right there before he goes any further. Astrology’s fundamental principles tell you how you’re supposed to interact with others based on their star sign: You’re compatible with this person. You should avoid that person. In pretty much every other context where you treat people differently due to something beyond their control, we have a word for it. People deserve to be treated equally regardless of their sexual orientation, skin color, and when they were born.



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Faithful Hindus Give Their Gods Billions of Dollars in Gold, Resist Government Bid To Put It In Interest Accounts

Gods need gold:

India is the world’s biggest consumer of gold and its ancient temples have collected billions of dollars in jewellery, bars and coins over the centuries — all hidden securely in vaults, some ancient and some modern. … Now, the Narendra Modi government reportedly wants to get his hands on this temple gold, estimated at about 3,000 tonnes, more than two-thirds of the gold held in the U.S bullion depository at Fort Knox, Kentucky, to help tackle India’s chronic trade imbalance.

The Modi government is planning to launch a scheme in May that would encourage temples to deposit their gold with banks in return for interest payments, it is said. The government is likely to melt the gold and loan it to jewellers to meet an insatiable appetite for gold and reduce economically-crippling gold imports, which accounted for 28 per cent of India’s trade deficit in the year ending March 2013.

Even if the plan succeeds, it’s still not nearly as good as converting the gold into cash directly to help the poor. Why would gods be interested in precious metals in the first place? It boggles the mind that more and more gold accrues to Hindu temples and none of it is used for anything but adornments, at best. A lot of the yellow metal just sits uselessly in vaults, hidden away for hundreds, possibly thousands of years.



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