Being gay only made Troy’s relationship with his father worse:
My father was so committed to the church and his role as a pastor that he rarely spent time with me growing up. He and I never had any quantity or quality time until he taught me to play racquetball and golf when I became a teenager, but the alienation that began in my adolescence could not be made up for and I never felt close to him. Even though he told me he loved me. He had a concept of how a boy should behave and compared me to my brother who was two years older who happened to love playing sports and was more athletic. I was more affectionate and artistic and enjoyed playing with my older sister more. Fearful I would not fit the mold of the boy he thought I needed to fit, he labeled me a “sissy” and warned me in my adolescence that I needed to change my behavior and “walk and talk” more like a “man” — be more like my brother. This saddled me with insecurity and I would struggle with self-confidence into adulthood.
Eventually, when the church transformed itself into something resembling a modern-day megachurch with mainstream evangelical beliefs, his father was laid off with no savings and nowhere else to go:
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