Pining for Viking sperm donors

So the USA has put restrictions on importing donated sperm from Europe, due to concerns about Mad Cow disease. This has many American women in an uproar because of their desire for Scandinavian sperm donors. This sympathetic report comments that “the Nordic donors were popular because of their blue eyes and blond hair, and their tendency to be tall and have advanced degrees.” Says one forelorn woman, separated from the father of her child with whom she wanted another,

“I’m Swedish-Norwegian and really wanted to have a gene pool that was similar to my own,” Peterson said. “I wanted a baby that looked like me and wanted to share my heritage with my baby. Now I have a beautiful Viking baby, which is what I wanted. I was hoping to give her a full sibling.”

Why don’t these women just go to Minnesota? Is this some fossilized remnant of monogamy? Anyway, can we count the ways this is wrong?

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What Are Your Thoughts?leave a comment
  • I see no problem in this. 😉

  • I see no problem in this. 😉

  • Anon

    Lars, the babes want you! 🙂

  • Anon

    Lars, the babes want you! 🙂

  • Alas, I’m the short, brown-haired, brown-eyed variety of Norwegian. My DNA’s the kind you get at Walgreens.

  • Alas, I’m the short, brown-haired, brown-eyed variety of Norwegian. My DNA’s the kind you get at Walgreens.

  • Ya know, if they’re going to the “bank” for this, five will get you ten that a high proportion of them might not qualify for “babe” status, unless we’re talking about that kids’ movie.

  • Ya know, if they’re going to the “bank” for this, five will get you ten that a high proportion of them might not qualify for “babe” status, unless we’re talking about that kids’ movie.

  • I take considerable satisfaction in the low level to which I have managed to steer the thread on this serious topic. 😀

  • I take considerable satisfaction in the low level to which I have managed to steer the thread on this serious topic. 😀

  • Joe Mama

    Swedish actor Peter Stormare commented after filming for Fargo that Minnesota is more Swedish than Sweden. That said, I tend to see more stocky brown-haired scandinavians among the Germans, Pols, and miscellanious others in MN. You would have to find a “bank” in the right part of rural MN.

  • Joe Mama

    Swedish actor Peter Stormare commented after filming for Fargo that Minnesota is more Swedish than Sweden. That said, I tend to see more stocky brown-haired scandinavians among the Germans, Pols, and miscellanious others in MN. You would have to find a “bank” in the right part of rural MN.

  • Keeping with Lars’ motif, I’m not going to Walgreen’s for a while, and ya wonder if the mum really wants a bearskin-clad drunken thief/rapist under her roof.

    Sorry, gracious host. We’ll try to clean it up.

  • Keeping with Lars’ motif, I’m not going to Walgreen’s for a while, and ya wonder if the mum really wants a bearskin-clad drunken thief/rapist under her roof.

    Sorry, gracious host. We’ll try to clean it up.

  • “The Nordic donors were popular because of … their tendency to … have advanced degrees.” Wait, is that what’s meant by “Master(‘s) Race”?

    Bike (@4), did you even read the article, or at least look at the accompanying photo? Do you really think only ugly women go to sperm banks?

  • “The Nordic donors were popular because of … their tendency to … have advanced degrees.” Wait, is that what’s meant by “Master(‘s) Race”?

    Bike (@4), did you even read the article, or at least look at the accompanying photo? Do you really think only ugly women go to sperm banks?

  • I would fail in my duty as a Viking reenactor if I did not protest strongly the characterization of Vikings as “bearskin-clad drunken thief/rapist(s).”

    It is a matter of record that contemporary Anglo-Saxons complained that the Vikings in England were enticing their women away by their effeminate habit of taking a bath once a week.

    Personal hygiene. It’s the secret of our success.

  • I would fail in my duty as a Viking reenactor if I did not protest strongly the characterization of Vikings as “bearskin-clad drunken thief/rapist(s).”

    It is a matter of record that contemporary Anglo-Saxons complained that the Vikings in England were enticing their women away by their effeminate habit of taking a bath once a week.

    Personal hygiene. It’s the secret of our success.

  • Now I didn’t say they didn’t bathe, Lars. :^)

    Nor did I say that ALL women who do this are physically unattractive, Todd. The reality is, however, that we are dealing here with women who are choosing to risk motherhood without involving the father; there is definitely an ugliness of spirit, and I would dare guess a lot of times an ugliness of body as well.

    The picture in the article? No. But I’d guess a lot of others, absolutely.

  • Now I didn’t say they didn’t bathe, Lars. :^)

    Nor did I say that ALL women who do this are physically unattractive, Todd. The reality is, however, that we are dealing here with women who are choosing to risk motherhood without involving the father; there is definitely an ugliness of spirit, and I would dare guess a lot of times an ugliness of body as well.

    The picture in the article? No. But I’d guess a lot of others, absolutely.

  • Bike (@10), wow, that’s quite a lot of presumptuousness on your part. Perhaps the sperm bank is also frequented by losers, nerds, and fatties?

    The article certainly makes a case that it is less about ability to find a sexual partner, but rather about an unwillingness to get involved with a man, in spite of the desire to have a child. This is all sorts of ridiculous.

    But what basis do you have for assuming that sperm banks are only for the unattractive (however defined)?

  • Bike (@10), wow, that’s quite a lot of presumptuousness on your part. Perhaps the sperm bank is also frequented by losers, nerds, and fatties?

    The article certainly makes a case that it is less about ability to find a sexual partner, but rather about an unwillingness to get involved with a man, in spite of the desire to have a child. This is all sorts of ridiculous.

    But what basis do you have for assuming that sperm banks are only for the unattractive (however defined)?

  • tODD, you get the prize for recognizing the Nazi element in this: Aryanism plus eugenics.

  • tODD, you get the prize for recognizing the Nazi element in this: Aryanism plus eugenics.

  • I wonder whether these women’s desire to reuse the same donor stems from some remaining natural knowledge of God’s intended order, or if it simply reflects their desire to have exactly what they want, with no restrictions on their choices.

    As far as I’m concerned, a little Scandinavian goes a long way. My husband is Finnish/Polish/Mexican/Native American, and that’s just fine with me.

  • I wonder whether these women’s desire to reuse the same donor stems from some remaining natural knowledge of God’s intended order, or if it simply reflects their desire to have exactly what they want, with no restrictions on their choices.

    As far as I’m concerned, a little Scandinavian goes a long way. My husband is Finnish/Polish/Mexican/Native American, and that’s just fine with me.

  • Todd, when a woman deliberately exposes herself and her child to life without the father, I would consider that base ugliness of spirit. Is that so complicated?

    And yes, such a selfishness and ugliness of spirit is going to cause the woman to have problems finding an ordinary mate, even if (as is the case in the article) the woman in question has worked for Hugh Hefner.

  • Todd, when a woman deliberately exposes herself and her child to life without the father, I would consider that base ugliness of spirit. Is that so complicated?

    And yes, such a selfishness and ugliness of spirit is going to cause the woman to have problems finding an ordinary mate, even if (as is the case in the article) the woman in question has worked for Hugh Hefner.

  • Oh please, Bike (@14)! Don’t try to turn a catty comment like “five will get you ten that a high proportion of them might not qualify for ‘babe’ status, unless we’re talking about that kids’ movie” into some noble assessment of “ugliness of spirit”. It’s clearly not about that at all.

  • Oh please, Bike (@14)! Don’t try to turn a catty comment like “five will get you ten that a high proportion of them might not qualify for ‘babe’ status, unless we’re talking about that kids’ movie” into some noble assessment of “ugliness of spirit”. It’s clearly not about that at all.

  • If you’re trying to prove that you have absolutely no sense of humor, Todd, you’re doing a great job.

    Let’s face facts; just because this article found one attractive person who is a customer at such a business does not change the fact that there are reasons that the average customer goes there, generally related to an inability to find an “ordinary donor” who fits their criteria. In other words, “babes,” or people eminently desireable to the opposite sex, they are not.

    It’s so nice to have you reading your own views into mine, but I’m going to have to ask you to stop.

  • If you’re trying to prove that you have absolutely no sense of humor, Todd, you’re doing a great job.

    Let’s face facts; just because this article found one attractive person who is a customer at such a business does not change the fact that there are reasons that the average customer goes there, generally related to an inability to find an “ordinary donor” who fits their criteria. In other words, “babes,” or people eminently desireable to the opposite sex, they are not.

    It’s so nice to have you reading your own views into mine, but I’m going to have to ask you to stop.

  • Bike (@16), you claim to talk about “the fact”, but you only offer guesswork and assumptions. Have you ever been to a sperm bank? Did you take a tally of attractive women there? I haven’t, but I have one data point in my favor, which is apparently one more than you have.

    In spite of my lack of a sense of humor, I’m still laughing at your tap-dancing with that “ugliness of spirit” nonsense. As if referring to ugly women as pigs (@4) somehow is beautiful on your part.

  • Bike (@16), you claim to talk about “the fact”, but you only offer guesswork and assumptions. Have you ever been to a sperm bank? Did you take a tally of attractive women there? I haven’t, but I have one data point in my favor, which is apparently one more than you have.

    In spite of my lack of a sense of humor, I’m still laughing at your tap-dancing with that “ugliness of spirit” nonsense. As if referring to ugly women as pigs (@4) somehow is beautiful on your part.

  • I am 32 and am seeking donor Scandanavian donor sperm because I come from Birmingham England and we have a shortage of healthy, motile donor sperm (not to mention the shortage of attractive, tall and intelligent men!)

  • I am 32 and am seeking donor Scandanavian donor sperm because I come from Birmingham England and we have a shortage of healthy, motile donor sperm (not to mention the shortage of attractive, tall and intelligent men!)