Saturday Night’s Alright (just alright)

One thing they don't tell you when you go into the ministry [wait--there are about a THOUSAND things that "they" don't tell you, but this is one] is that you should say good bye to Saturdays. They no longer exist. Well, at least not for you.This is why many clergy take Fridays off--to have the whole day free, knowing the next morning does not press too closely in on your sabbath day. But even then, busy churches have life on Saturdays, at least on occasion.I am a Monday-off person myself. … [Read more...]

You Can’t Handle the Truth

Some people have a loose relationship with the truth. I get that. Now me, I was born with this pesky built-in truth-telling device that makes it dang near impossible for me to lie.  I would fail a lie detector test in 2 seconds flat. If i even catch myself wandering from the truth, my heartrate goes up, i get naseous, i feel the beginnings of canker sores... and these are for the little white lies. Like when somebody asks me "can you tell I've gained weight?" or "aren't my kids the  cutest t … [Read more...]

And Paul Thought Corinth Was Bad…

Naked is all the rage.Naked Juice: great lunch in a quick and easy container. Crazy expensive, but unless they're lying on the label, it's actually good for you.Naked Pizza=new franchise in my neighborhood. Perhaps unfortunately named, because my first thought is, plain crust. No sauce, no cheese, no toppings. What's the point? In fact, it is hippie organic whole food ingredients, blah blah blah. Again, unless the material lies, it is actually good for you.Naked and Famous … [Read more...]

Birth Order Bingo

whatever-its-cool

We've all heard the rumor that first children are more successful. Well, it's not a rumor. More recently, I heard it supported by scientific evidence. First-borns get more alone time with their parents, an uninterrupted infancy, mom's more likely to breastfeed before there are multiple kids to juggle, dad's got more time to listen to Focus on the Family (ok, i made that one up because i always get lots of hits when i tag j.d...)In any case, you've probably heard all this. It's not a new idea … [Read more...]

The Greatest Sweepstakes EVER

My aunt has won vehicles in sweepstakes contests. Not once. Not twice. But THREE TIMES. Impossibly good luck? Maybe that too. But mostly, it's because of the sheer volume of entries. Filling out those forms is how she unwinds. She doesn't knit or watch junk tv or go on frivilous shopping errands. She does plenty of worthwhile things in her very full and busy life, like granparenting and teaching nursing students and being a full-time minister's wife, just to name a few. But when she has downtime … [Read more...]

Too Marvelous For Me

On occasion, it becomes necessary to bring one's children to one's office.I may not be the most organized person in the world. I may not be a compulsive cleaner. But the calamity that ensues any time i bring my kids to work for a few minutes...let's just say, it makes the rest of my life look orderly to a fault. For every 15 minutes that I spend making a few quick phone calls, gathering some reading to do at home, or answering emails--it takes an hour to clean up the next day. Sometimes, I … [Read more...]

A Little Bit Red…

"Why is it that every time we go to southern California, we are absolutely the Clampets?!"  A personal favorite Bartlett-ism from The West Wing gospel files. President Bartlett and his staff have travelled to California, where they need to really impress some people who could help them get re-elected, and calimity ensues. Ultimately, his personal aid and his White House Communications Director get into a bar fight and wind up in jail.Thinking of that moment as I wonder: Why is it that, w … [Read more...]

There is No One Like Our God

There is no "I" in Christian.Oh, wait...I've finally figured it out. Why I can't stand Christian radio. For years, it's been driving me bananas, and I don't even listen to it enough to make a fair justification of why. I keep thinking maybe I've judged the whole industry unfairly. Kind of like cauliflower. Every now and then I figure, "I'm a grown up now, I should like this..."  So I give it another bite--another 30 seconds or so of my listening time... After all, I like to know how C … [Read more...]

Muffin Moment: A Mean Mom and Minister

muffin-mess1

I gave her 3 chances. I am not a mean mom.3 chances to help me make muffins without sticking her hand in the bowl of flour and sugar. After the third, she was not allowed to help me anymore. Kicking screaming meltdown ensued. Morning—day OFF morning—disrupted. Was it worth it?Thing is, it was not about the muffin mess. I don’t mind cleaning a little flour off the counter. But after 3 times, she was testing. And the answer to that test is, if you do something mom or dad says not to do, ba … [Read more...]


CLOSE | X

HIDE | X