No Habla! Americano!

Your diarist was a sluggard getting to church this morning and thus had to go to the Spanish language Mass in Bellingham. Very few Anglos were in attendance: the priest with his fluent but imperfect Spanish and yours truly (“no habla… what’s that other word?”) and that was about it. I have been christened an [Read More…]

Why I Would Make an Awful Priest

Four words: the sacrament of reconciliation. You did what!? [Read more…]

Our Father, Who Messes With Protestants

Through Facebook, in response to my last post about the new translation of the Mass, reader Matthew Hogan gives us a couple of pitch-perfect paragraphs: You young’un/convert, Mr. Lott. When I, and so many others, was a mere Roman-rite tyke, just after de-Latinization post Vatican 2, the new English mass was exactly pretty much the [Read More…]

Catholic Mass Questionaire

How’s that new Mass translation working out for you — and your parish? In the two parishes that I attend with some regularity, it was bumpy for a few weeks or even months. Yet by now even some of the more drastic changes have been swallowed. For instance, in that bit where we used to [Read More…]

My Church Is All Wet

You know what’s great about going to a Catholic church on a hot day? [Read more…]

Suffer the Little Collection Basket

Your diarist was dreading going to Mass at the home parish today after a few weeks in Bellingham but — you know what? — not so bad. Father Flapdoodle’s* homily on the loaves and the fishes was short and not awful, though it did arguably veer a little too close to Steven Spielberg’s Theology of [Read More…]

Trinities and Tooth Fairies

Last week, I did double duty because Real Clear Religion deputy Nick Hahn was having his wisdom teeth yanked out. I explained to him that he wasn’t allowed near the website and even ordered him off the Internet for several days because we didn’t want him inventing some new “Vicodin-based religion.” That was a joke, [Read More…]

Speed Usher!

Last night in Bellingham, at Church of the Assumption, a couple renewed their vows on the 15th anniversary of their marriage. (Priest: “Will you accept children lovingly from God?” Wife, flanked by two young sons: “We did!”) The family also presented the gifts. This created logistical comedy gold. The mum and dad went in front [Read More…]

Out of Africa, Thank God

When I go to Mass and learn that the presider is an African — as in, a priest from Africa, usually in the US for studies of some sort — the automatic response is a broad, goofy ginger smile. I love African priests. They come from such a different cultural template than what Americans are [Read More…]

Devout This!

This morning, I would have been almost on time for Mass. Fortunately, yours truly got so caught up with a Darrell Issa interview on the radio that Father Flapdoodle’s homily was half-way over by the time I walked in. Listening to him tell us the story of his week made me wish I had listened [Read More…]