Want to see how un-Christlike you are? Try raising kids

March 7, 2013 By 11 Comments
fathers don't provoke your children

If you're looking for a gauge to measure how un-Christlike you are, try raising kids. At least that works pretty well for me. In The Four Loves C.S. Lewis speaks of "the bad manners of parents to children." Ahem. Guilty. The other day I spoke harshly to my son. An hour later he was rude, and Megan corrected him. "In our home we honor each other with our words," she told him. And I had to interrupt and apologize right there, lest I make her a hypocrite. I had not honored my son in my … [Read more...]

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Pat Robertson, Petraeus, and sexual infidelity

November 14, 2012 By 13 Comments
Pat Robertson, CBN

Groan. So here we have an unfolding scandal involving infidelity in the highest reaches of the U.S. military and intelligence community, and what does Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson say about it? Commenting on the affair of General David Petraeus and biographer Paula Broadwell, Robertson said it was "[a]mazing . . . that the affairs of the heart seem to catch these guys." But then he set up a string of mitigators: Petraeus was away, Broadwell was hot, so what can we expect? "I mean, … [Read more...]

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Celebrating faithful mothers

May 13, 2012 By 6 Comments
Celebrating Mothers

The most obvious thing to do with mothers is to celebrate them. I watch my Megan day in and out striving to raise, nurture, encourage, protect, correct, and prepare our kids. It's a humbling thing to behold. When I say that I couldn't do it, I say the obvious. When I say that she does, I speak of the miraculous. God has a special concern for mothers, something apparent in both the Bible and the memory of the church, which tell the story of so many noteworthy mothers. Just start with the … [Read more...]

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You get more of what you focus on

April 26, 2012 By 6 Comments
Slug Bug

My son Fionn and I play the drive-time game Slug Bug. The idea, if you're unfamiliar with it, is to identify as many Volkswagen Beetles as possible while out and about and thereby rack up points against your opponent. Right now I'm creaming my kid, I'm proud to say. Don't feel sorry for him. He used to win all the time. One thing I've noticed is that since playing, I see Bugs everywhere -- all the time. Red ones, blue ones, silver ones, yellow ones, avocado-green ones, white ones. They're … [Read more...]

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The romance of commitment

July 28, 2011 By 29 Comments
The romance of commitment

Men are justifiably famous for lacking commitment, enjoying irresponsibility and freedom as long as we can reasonably stretch it, and oftentimes several yards past that. One manifestation of this artful dodge is that marriage ages have gone up and up in recent decades along with the cohabitation stats. … [Read more...]

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How marriage works on you

July 21, 2011 By 11 Comments
How Marriage Works on You

I've written in the past about the mystery of marriage, how it transforms its participants. That's part of its very purpose, to conform us to the image of Christ and deepen our communion with God. I've still got a long way to go and, as they say, results may vary, but here are three positive ways that marriage to Megan has begun to change me. 1. Learning to love better The more circumstances require you to love like Christ, the more like Christ you become. That's the hope at least … [Read more...]

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What a good wife gets you

July 8, 2011 By 4 Comments
Megan!

A smile when you step through the door A hug when you head back out Mercy when you don't deserve it An embrace when you really need it Someone who will pray for you Someone who will tell you no A friend to share the better moments A partner to ride out the lesser ones Laughter, affection, home Warmth, surprise, support Kind words, wise words, funny words Hard words, soft words, sweet words Welcome indulgence Necessary resistance Encouragement Astounding intelligence and … [Read more...]

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The sanctifying power of marriage

February 21, 2011 By 6 Comments
Icon of the wedding feast at Cana

When I think of marriage I think of grace, particularly the phrase “grace for the moment.” Marriage requires grace every moment if it’s going to be what God desires it to be. Thankfully, God extends his grace to us through marriage. Historically speaking, the church has always recognized marriage as a sacrament. This is important to understand when speaking of the mystery of marriage, as Paul does in Ephesians. The words “mystery” and “sacrament” are synonymous. The first is … [Read more...]

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The lost mystery of marriage

February 18, 2011 By 26 Comments
The Mystery of Marriage

Ask a person what they think about marriage in society today, and they’ll probably say that the institution isn’t looking too pretty. Yes, the divorce rate has steadily declined over the last thirty years in the U.S., but so has the number of people getting married in the first place. More and more couples are choosing to live together unwed, while domestic partnerships and gay-marriage initiatives challenge the traditional purpose and place of marriage entirely. Various versions of … [Read more...]

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Marriage and the sacrament of joint checking

February 7, 2011 By 20 Comments
Money

Marriage has the power to make you better or worse as a person, and nothing proves the point as quickly as money. You can become the very worst version of yourself while looking over bank statements with your spouse. (Been there.) Disagreements and rifts build over issues like overspending, hidden habits, unequal responsibilities, and overwhelming debt. No surprise that financial discord is at the root of many divorces. But what if a bank statement could make you the best version of yourself, … [Read more...]

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