How I Got a Blog on Huffington Post (And Help Me Mooch Indian Food!)

Last night Cat and I had drinks and dinner with a new friend (DR!) at this place, if you can stand the ridiculous beauty of it. (Our Actual Table was the one to the right of the standing waiter with the blue shirt, where the four guys in sunglasses are playing Quick: Tell Us Apart.) [Read More…]

Cat Writes Our Lives

By way of some work I’m doing on All In … Almost (or, “Wow, Obnoxious Much?”), I went and found this poem, which I wanted to (and will) include in the book. It was written by my wife Catherine seven months before she and I were married. San Francisco Once, we lived in an old [Read More…]

Writing Jobs I’ve Had (And What They Paid)

In the comment thread of yesterday’s What Book Publishers Want Most, But Can’t Have, a reader wrote, “John, this is probably really rude of me to ask, but how do you make a living writing? I know it’s what you spend your time doing– thank God—but who pays you? You blog for Huffington, right? I know, [Read More…]

What Book Publishers Want Most, But Can’t Have

A continuation of the conversation I started with yesterday’s My New Book Has Taken Over My Head. Here are a few random thoughts floating through my head as I take a break this morning from working on my new book: What kind of stupid business am I in, anyway? Giving your book to an agent, so [Read More…]

My New Book Has Taken Over My Head

What I should do is kill this blog. It’s about my only hope for finishing the book I’m now writing, which is so important to me I can’t think about anything else anyway. Then again, stop blogging? Nayeth! I sayeth unto your eyeballs. The working title of my new book is All In … Almost: [Read More…]


As I sit here feeling for some terrible reason I sense but can’t grasp that I’m finally going to spill my morning cup of coffee all over my laptop that I never actually put on my lap because as much as I enjoy lounging and writing I hate it when my thighs get fried, I [Read More…]


It’s four a.m., and I just awoke from a dream that ended with me in tears. Thought I’d share. There are times when I like — or, more truly, need — to write. Not as in “think something profound and express it with words”; but physically, with a pen or pencil on paper, to write. [Read More…]

Sad Proof I’m Still Straight

Dear gay friend of mine from high school who is now a pretty famous interior decorator (dude! sweet!): Hi! It was so awesome to hear from you! I miss you. You asked what my office looks like. Here’s a picture of it: As you can see, I’m still straight. God, even I’m embarrassed by those [Read More…]

Don’t Make Me Smack You With a Ruler in Public This Weekend

This Saturday (September 25) I’ll be at the annual San Diego Christian Writers Guild’s writer’s conference, where I’ll be boring confusing infuriating inspiring writers via the class I’ll be teaching, “Surviving the Blog Clog.” (I’ll be doing that class twice: first at 11 a.m., and then again at 2 p.m. I’ll also be at the [Read More…]

My Life as a Major Criminal, Pt. 2

[This is part two of day-before-yesterday’s My Life as a Major Criminal.] “Almost time,” Ben whispered to me at 2:50 p.m. Ben was literally my partner in crime. If I was Clyde, Ben was Bonny, except he would look terrible in a dress. But to pull off a caper Ben would put on a dress [Read More…]