Driscoll’s Porn

We looked at porn on Tuesday.

No, not the photos. I mean as a class we discussed the prevalence of porn in a society that adheres to the First Amendment. Every time we thought we’d arrived at a consensus among us as to what ought to be allowable and what shouldn’t be, we discovered someone who disagreed. Or maybe a lot of someones.

We discussed this excellent article in The New Yorker, He’s Just Not that Into You. And we watched this troubling interview between Ted Bundy and James Dobson.

Some students came forward with pretty revealing stories about their own personal boundaries, but the discussion wasn’t confessional-based, it was all part of wrestling with how does a society built upon the freedoms of the First Amendments then make a path forward for the betterment of a society as a whole.

Fortunately for my students I had not yet seen this review of Seattle pastor Mark Driscoll’s book on marriage. Here’s a snippet of the review by Lori Fox:

The advice contained in Real Marriage by Mark Driscoll and Grace Driscoll is mainly sound, but fairly vague. At least, until you get to the chapter entitled: Can We______? which can get fairly graphic in describing what kind of sex is and isn’t allowed in marriage. The idea is to present the method of determining whether or not a particular sex act is allowed in marriage by questioning whether it is lawful biblically and by the laws of the land, if it is helpful, or if it is enslaving. The couple is to discuss these three things together before deciding whether or not a specific act is a good fit for them sexually, and to only proceed if it is both lawful and helpful and not enslaving, and only if both partners agree to it. This section is mainly written by Mark Driscoll, and discusses oral sex, anal sex, and role playing, among others. The section on masturbation seems to be particularly long.


To be fair, I know Driscoll isn’t the only pastor who seems to possess a prurient preaching style. Mega-church pastor Ed Young and his wife have been rollicking on the rooftops in an effort to get God back in the bedroom. Pastors like Mark Driscoll and Ed Young are media whores in the way that Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian are. As we did discuss in class, there is always going to be certain unsavory segment of a free society who will always exploit those freedoms for their own advantage and pocketbook and not for the betterment of society as a whole.

I’m pretty sure this wasn’t what George Mason and James Madison and others had in mind when they came up with the idea of the First Amendments, but they hadn’t planned on a society ruled by greed and corruption either. I think that’s exactly what they were trying to escape.

Personally, I don’t give a rat’s tail what kind of sex toys Mark Driscoll and Grace employ. I don’t care if they do it doggie style or stick to the missionary position.

I just wish to God that pastors everywhere would keep to their own bedrooms and out of ours.

Pastors like Driscoll should quit hiding behind their spiritual positions and their pulpits as they promulgate porn to the Body and proudly proclaim that they are just preaching and teaching.

 

About Karen Spears Zacharias

Author. Speaker. Journalism Instructor. Four kids. Three dogs. One grandson.

  • Rick

    From what I understand, Driscoll wrote the book in response to the countless questions he was being asked about it. He thought it just would be easier to address in book form.

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      Perhaps so and perhaps it’s also true that Hilton and Kardashian didn’t leak their own sex tapes for publicity purposes.

  • AFRoger

    Sex is perhaps the greatest adhesive ever built. It sticks to practically anything, sometimes to our eyeballs, our reason, our judgment and our souls. When used appropriately, it blesses and strengthens the bond between two people. When used inappropriately, it can bond so tightly to us that we are unable to bond permanently to anyone else. Kinda like two strips of duct tape when the sticky sides meet: inseparable but no longer useful.

    Seems to me that the underlying question always leads to idolatry. What do we worship in place of God? Sex? Wealth? Self? Stuff? Fame? Political power? Weapons systems? Church? Pickup? Deer rifle? Wardrobe? iphone? Booze? Football? God’s got a lotta competition these days. Sex is stuck to a lot of it. Pastors need to recognize that, pastor it and, for sure, lead by example. That’s an order becoming taller all the time.

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      I keep wondering how we got to this place — the place where Joel Osteen and Mark Driscoll are this nation’s go-to pastors?

      • Anonymous

        I wonder the same thing, Karen. Those two seem like they’re at opposite ends of the spectrum. I wonder, does the fact that “Joel Osteen and Mark Driscoll are this nation’s go-to-pastors” say anything about where we are spiritually and as a society? I fear it does, and what it says isn’t good. I’d appreciate your thoughts.

      • AFRoger

        Well… are they in fact our go-to pastors? Years ago, a pastor friend observed that there were two kinds of churches: advice churches and grace churches. Might be some truth to that. Rules will always outsell grace. And self-promotion drives much of what’s being “sold” today. A question we can always ask ourselves is this one. Does it make the most of Christ?

  • Wade Trimmer

    Driscoll sickens me in the same way my strange uncle sickens me. He’s part of the family but I just can’t hang with him or read his stuff.

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      Hey Wade: We all have one of those uncles, don’t we?

  • Andynjulie

    although this book is something I personally do not care to read. whoever is concerned, ask the author, pastor driscoll is sure to answer. seems pastor was just answering questions asked, so he and his wife wrote a book. it is true thatalot of people just dont know where these questions apply to scripture. alot of people do not reads their Bibles.

    • Andynjulie

      by the way, i googled online found scriptures. http://www.the-intimate-couple.com/scriptures-on-marriage.html we people can offend one another simply discussing sensitive topics. a pastor writes a book and look what we are doing. discuss with pastor driscoll, he’ll nicely answer you back :)

      • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

        I’m not clear what your point is with your googled website. The only people without a blog these days is likely incarcerated. How come you don’t want to read Driscoll’s book?

  • Anonymous

    You don’t need a book (or even a chapter in a book) to answer the question “Can We ___?” The Bible doesn’t have anything to say on the subject and darned if I’m going to lose sleep at night (so to speak) worrying about whether something is legal.

    That said, it’s always good advice for husband and wife to respect each other when making these decisions, but that’s true of all aspects of marriage, not just sex.

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      Yes, respect in all aspects of marriage.

  • guest2028

    I find this an interesting topic. I am not a Driscoll fan, yet I do understand his reason for releasing this book with this specific chapter (assuming it was an effort to answer questions he is bombarded with). I, personally, will never read this book. And, that is the beauty of it all. I can choose whether to pick it up or not. He may be putting his love-life in the media, but I by no means have to partake. On another note, I find it strange that married couples can’t answer these questions for themselves. Do you really need someone given you a play-by-play? That part boggles my mind. Aren’t his readers typically believers in God, the all-knowing, who gives them guidance in all aspects of their lives? Can’t they just pray to him rather than seek the guidance of Driscoll?

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      You raise some important questions. Isn’t the bedroom a bit crowded when you invite your pastor into it?

  • http://mikesnow.org/ Michael Snow

    Excellent article. I did not know who Driscoll was until these reviews started popping up on Christian blogs. I don’t condone his chapter, but you can bet your booties that there was a salivating book agent with dollar signs in his eyes behind this. That Driscoll received countless questions about sodomy, etc, does not wash with me.

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      Michael: I’m with you. I just don’t believe that he was getting an onslaught of questions… so many he felt the need to answer them via a book. This is being driven by marketing.

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_AWXWAIDKWFXZNQQ67IHJAAWPU4 Di

    Amen, sister!!!!!

  • Revrun71

    I’m a pastor who loves sex but have no interest in anyone’s personal sex life but my own and certainly don’t feel the need to advise or judge or whatever. That’s your business and I trust adults to know what’s best for them.

    • http://karenzach.com Karen Spears Zacharias

      As they say in the Marines: Good on Ya!


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