Prayer Before Sex? It’ll Never Catch On!

When I was a child, I once heard my mother talking with a friend about sex.

Not the “oh my gosh!” kind of sex talk. You see, the woman and her husband were very devout; and her complaint was that after they had sexual relations he would pop up, kneel beside the bed, and pray. Every time.

I don’t know whether he intended it to be a prayer for forgiveness, but that’s how she took it. She felt—rightly or wrongly—that her husband considered sex to be a necessary evil, a means of conceiving children and a subject for the confessional.

Years later, as an adult with a better understanding of marital love and human relationships, I’ve sometimes chuckled about that story. I’m guessing their communication was less than open, and their evenings in their nuptial bed were… um… chaste and unremarkable.

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The story was brought to mind today, when I read about a new Prayer Book for Spouses just released by the London-based Catholic Truth Society. The 64-page prayer booklet draws on Scripture, Catholic teaching, and the Marriage Rite to encourage spouses to grow together in their prayer life, as well as in other areas of their relationship. It offers encouragement to spouses who find it difficult to work through certain areas of their relationship, and it calls spouses to renew their commitment to fidelity within the bonds of marriage.

What is sure to make headlines, though, is one selection in particular: the “Prayer Before Making Love.”

  • I imagine busy mothers, tucking their children into bed, heading back to the living room where hubby has opened a new bottle of wine, giving him that “Come thither” look—and pulling out the ol’ prayer book.
  •  Or a loving husband, wanting to signal that he’d really like a backrub and then, who knows where it’ll go from there? Let’s just open up the prayer book and see!
  • The Prayer Book for Spouses would be a great engagement gift…. But of course, the chaste fiancée would never consider opening it to THAT page until after the wedding!

I once had a bas relief of Mary which had been hung in an unfortunate spot, where she looked down onto our bed. I found it a little disconcerting. Jesus said that we should pray always; but is that what he meant? The prayer is lovely, but perhaps one would then need to refocus….

If you and your spouse are seeking to enrich your lovemaking with an opening prayer, perhaps you’ll appreciate this lovely meditation.

PRAYER BEFORE MAKING LOVE

Father, send your Holy Spirit into our hearts. Place within us love that truly gives, tenderness that truly unites, self-offering that tells the truth and does not deceive, forgiveness that truly receives, loving physical union that welcomes.

Open our hearts to you, to each other and to the goodness of your will. Cover our poverty in the richness of your mercy and forgiveness. Clothe us in our true dignity and take to yourself our shared aspirations, for your glory, for ever and ever.

Mary, our Mother, intercede for us. Amen.

Cornelio Fabro: Apostle and Missionary of Culture

Had he lived, Italian philosopher and Thomistic theologian Father Cornelio Fabro (1911 – 1995) would have been 100 years old on August 24.

The founder of the Institute for Higher Studies on Unbelief, Religion and Cultures, Father Fabro was a prolific writer, a follower of St. Thomas Aquinas whose works explored the worldview of Danish Christian philosopher Søren Kierkegaard. 

In his Participation and Causality, an analysis of the work of Aquinas, Fabro identified the notion of participation as the hermeneutical key to Thomism. 

Fabro’s work is being organized, translated and published through the efforts of Fr. Elvio Celestino Fontana, head of the Cornelio Fabro Cultural Project.  To date, 25 volumes of Fabro’s writings have been published; but Fr. Fontana expects that Fabro’s writings—books, university lecturs, notes, complete records of courses or cycles—will fill hundreds of volumes. 

L’Osservatore Romano, in recognition of Fabro’s substantial body of work in Thomistic theology and philosophy, published an interview with Fr. Fontana.  Their full interview is available here.

Wikipedia lists a few of his works which were originally published in Italian, but which are being translated into English:

  • The metaphysical notion of participation according to St. Thomas Aquinas, Edizioni Scientifiche Italiane,Turin, 1939;
  • Perception and thought, Vita e Pensiero,Milan, 1941;
  • The Phenomenology of perception, Vita e Pensiero,Milan, 1941;
  • Introduction to Existentialism, Vita e Pensiero,Milan, 1943;
  • Problems of Existentialism, A.V.E.,Rome, 1945;
  • Between Kierkegaard and Marx: for a definition of existence, Vallecchi,Florence, 1952;
  • The absolute in Existentialism, Miano,Catania, 1953;
  • God: Introduction to the theological problem, Studium,Rome, 1953;
  • The spirit, Studium,Rome, 1955;
  • From being to existing, Morcelliana,Brescia, 1957;
  • Short introduction to Thomism, Desclée,Rome, 1960;
  • Participation and causality according to St. Thomas Aquinas, Edizioni Scientifiche Italiane,Turin, 1960;
  • Introduction to modern atheism, Studium,Rome, 1964;
  • Man and the risk of God, Studium,Rome, 1967;
  • Thomistic Exegeses, PapalLateranUniversity,Rome, 1969;
  • Thomism and modern thought,PapalLateranUniversity,Rome, 1969;
  • Karl Rahner and the thomistic hermeneutic, Divus Thomas,Piacenza, 1972;
  • The adventure of progressive theology, Rusconi,Milan, 1974;
  • The anthropological turn of Karl Rahner, Rusconi,Milan, 1974;
  • Ludwig Feuerbach: the essence of Christianity, Japadre,L’Aquila, 1977;
  • Prayer in modern thought, Editioni di Storia e Letteratura,Rome, 1979;
  • The trap of historical compromise: fromTogliattito Berlinguer, Logos,Rome, 1979;
  • The unacceptability of historical compromise, Quadrivium,Genoa, 1980;
  • The alienation of the West: observations on the thought of And Severino, Quadrivium,Genoa, 1981;
  • Introduction toSaint Thomas, Ares,Milan, 1983;
  • Reflections on freedom, Maggioli,Rimini, 1983;
  • The Rosmini enigma, Edizioni Scientifiche Italiane,Naples, 1988;
  • Tests of the existence of God, La Scuola,Brescia, 1989;
  • The odyssey of nihilism, Guida,Naples, 1990;
  • For a plan of Christian philosophy, D’Auria,Naples, 1990.

A New Doctor of the Church! (And Six Ladies Waiting.)

Six women, from throughout Europe.  They didn’t know one another; but each enjoyed a deep mystical relationship with God.  They are:

  • Saint Veronica Giuliani –Italy
  • Saint Hildegard of Bingen –Germany
  • Saint Gertrude of Helfta –Germany
  • Saint Bridget –Sweden
  • Saint Margaret Mary Alacoque –France
  • Blessed Julian of Norwich –England

The common thread uniting these saints and blesseds—apart from their discernible sanctity—is that all are on the list to be considered for the title of “Doctor of the Church.”  They follow in the footsteps of three saintly women who have been already been given the title:  Saint Teresa of Avila and Saint Catherine of Siena, invested by Pope Paul in 1970; and Saint Thérèse of Lisieux, who received the title from Pope John Paul II in 1997.

With this week’s surprise announcement by Pope Benedict, declaring Saint John of Avila the 34th Doctor of the Church, the list of candidates still under consideration is at seventeen.  In addition to the six women named above, the eleven holy men who are likely to be named “Doctor” are Saint Gregory of Narek, Saint John Bosco, Saints Cyril and Methodius, Saint Lorenzo Giustiniani, Saint Antonino of Florence, Saint Thomas of Villanova, Saint Ignatius of Loyola, Saint Vincent de Paul, Saint Louis-Marie Grignion de Montfort, and Saint Bernardino of Siena.

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So how, exactly, does one become a “Doctor of the Church”?

There are three conditions which must be met before a holy person will be accorded the title of “Doctor”:

  • Eminens doctrina (eminent learning).  That is, the saint’s writings or preaching have contributed to Catholic thought and are useful for people “in any age.”  It’s important to note that their writings are not considered “infallible”—although “Doctors of the Church” certainly manifest a profound understanding of theology and orthodoxy.
  • Insignis vitae sanctitas (a high degree of sanctity).    One must be holy, of course.  Most of the Doctors of the Church were mystics—that is, they experienced visions or manifestations of God’s presence in their lives, in ways that are not common.
  • Ecclesiae declaration (proclamation by the Church).

And judging from the list of “Doctors” named to date, it can’t hurt to be a founder of a religious order, or a member of a contemplative order.

These unique qualifiers, though, may not be the only route to receiving the title.  In the future, the title of “Doctor” may be conferred on martyrs, as well as on mystics.  At least, that’s an option which was laid out by the Jesuit writer Giandomenico Mucci, who published an article on “The Title of Doctor of the Church” in La Civiltà Cattolica in 1997.

Mucci went on to explain that while mystics and martyrs can be considered, popes cannot.  Mucci explained that the title “Doctor of the Church” is based on the “eminens doctrina.”  It can’t, he writes, be concealed under any gift of sanctity possessed by the candidate.  So even a martyr in whom the Church recognizes the “eminens doctrina” (Ignatius, Irenaeus, Cyprian) can be elevated to the doctorate, despite the different historical practice.

However, Mucci adds, the documents produced by a Roman pontiff, by virtue of his guarantee of infallibility, are already authoritative—not because of the “eminens doctrina” possessed as a personal gift of grace, but by virtue of the office he holds, as supreme pastor and doctor of all the faithful.

Mucci’s speculation has yet to be put to the test.  Currently, two Vatican congregations—the Congregation for the Causes of Saints, and the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith—are reviewing the practices for naming Doctors.