The Time My Friends Didn’t Like My Song… and They were Right

We say we want it, but we don’t always want the truth and what it may bring. But still, we say we want it.

I’m in the studio now, working on another Kirk record. And sometimes I have ideas that are a little left. So, to make sure that I’m not looking stupid in my creative process, I am always asking those around me for their honest opinion about my songs and the creative vision I have for them.

Now before I go further, let me explain to some of you who wonder why this would be an example worth sharing. You must understand that people who create any type of ideas always feel venerable to those ideas and visions being critiqued or criticized. Like if someone was judging your baby to see if they were cute or not; to see if the outfit you spent hours putting together for your little angel gets the “oohs” and “ahhs” you were hoping for. That’s how deep it is. So, I had an idea for a song that was a little different but was personal to me; they ALL are personal to me.

After I played the idea, the room fell silent. Not in wonder but in shock that I had pushed the envelope that far, and because what I was pushing wasn’t that good. And although I wanted truth, deep down I wanted praise.

When you look at many situations in our world, whether they be political, cultural, creative or relational, imagine how different the outcome would be in these situations if the ones at the steering wheel were told the truth about where they were taking the rest of the passengers in the vehicle. I am a firm believer that most leaders suffer because of “yes” people. I will not insult your intelligence by acting like you don’t know what that is. But just in case, it is the crew of people that are so glad to be on board with their favorite celebrity or church leader or elected official that when an idea or moral choice is made that could damage not only their brand [I hate the word brand! I feel it messes up motive] but the respect and trust of those who invest time and money into the dreams and visions of those that now only dream for themselves.

I didn’t want to hear their critique after they gave it, but imagine if they were a room full of “yes” people who just want to make me happy instead of making me better. It is in the broken low place of accountability that the greatness in us becomes greater. The people that only tell you what you want will not be there when you reach your creative peak and then leave you for the next fresh young hot king with his or her eye on your nice little plush throne. But maybe, your reign could have been a little longer if they would have just told you THE TRUTH. Face it, everything you do won’t be great. That’s hard for perfectionist or prideful personalities. We think all of our stuff is the bomb. It ain’t. Having super close friends of the opposite sex as a married man ain’t a bomb idea in the positive way. But it WILL be a bomb that will explode in your face leaving you and her looking like fools. And your homeboys that rooted you on could have stopped it. Be very careful of a team of people that live vicariously through you. They will say yes to you because they are just excited to be around influence and dreams. You’d be surprised at the large amount of people just existing, working for a check, too afraid to speak up because they don’t wanna rock the boat. You need truth around you. Real, hard, gully truth. You need your wife to be free to tell you the truth about the assistant you’re considering hiring, or the man in your life to be free to tell you that your life is bigger than the kids, and you are a dreamer as well that has given up on flying. But when you get the truth, see it as a life preserver. Don’t reject it. It is there to stop the drowning that can occur when we swim in our own self praise or understanding of what we think is best.

Listen closely to the ones God has put in your life. You want to know how some horrible movies or albums are made? Those people were not invited in the room or asked to leave. Every pastor or CEO that fell, saw the warning signs but ignored the truth.

TRUTH: It sets us free. It keeps us out of outfits that don’t go with our body shape. It protects us from dance moves that could ruin our reputation. It puts divorce lawyers out of business, and it strengthens churches and its leaders. And it made Kirk go back and write four different verses to this new song I can’t wait for you to hear, because somebody told me the truth.

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