A Brave Review: My baggage gets in the way

I watched the new Disney/Pixar movie Brave over the weekend. I was hoping to like it and even identify with it as much as I had liked Tangled. In the end, I was disappointed, but still slightly conflicted. The entire second half of the movie had me cringing. And then smiling. And then cringing.I find more and more that my background affects how I view a movie. I cried through Tangled because I saw myself in it, and this has happened for other movies as well. It's the reason I can't watch … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Advice for Others

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What advice do you have for other young adults currently questioning or leaving Christian Patriarchy/Quiverfull ideology? Joe: Coming soon. Latebloomer: Your questions are there, deep down: be honest with God and yourself and acknowledge them.  God is big enough to handle your questions.  Then try to find answers for those questions with the mind that God gave you.  It can be a scary journey but life is much richer and more interesting when you venture out of the box that you were raised in … [Read more...]

Courtship, Part 3: They Said He Would Leave Me

The whole reason I was sold on the idea of participating in a parent-guided courtship in the first place was my fear that if I chose my own husband I would be blinded by love or manipulated by an unscrupulous young man and thus end up in a hellish marriage. Following a parent-guided courtship was the safe thing to do. My father would protect me by vetting my suitors and choosing a good husband for me when I could not trust myself to make that choice on my own.But then I broke with the plan. … [Read more...]

Courtship, Part 2: What’s Important and What Isn’t

I explained in Part 1 why the idea of a parent-guided courtship was appealing to me. In that post I described the courtship process that I grew up expecting. Here I am going to focus on one aspect of that: the process by which the father vets his daughter's prospective suitors. This is, after all, how the father is supposed to protect his daughter from a disastrous match by helping her choose a husband.My father made a list, a list of qualifications that any young man would have to meet on … [Read more...]

Courtship, Part 1: Eroding Girls’ Self Confidence

When I was in high school, I looked forward to the day when I would take part in a parent-guided courtship. It's what I wanted. The idea that I could go out myself and find my own spouse was incomprehensible to me. In fact, I even said that I would be open to an arranged marriage. More than that, there was even a point where I wanted an arranged marriage. Why, you ask? Let me explain.The idea that adult daughters should obey their fathers - an idea central to Christian Patriarchy - is … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Continuing Influence

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What do you think is the biggest way being raised in a family influenced by Christian Patriarchy/Quiverfull ideas has influenced who you are today? Joe: Coming soon. Latebloomer: I feel grateful that I have seen the world through two completely different worldviews.  I feel like it makes me able to relate to more people, which is useful in my profession because I have to facilitate interaction between people from very different cultures.   It also helps me understand both sides of the po … [Read more...]

“Different but Complementary” and “Separate but Equal”

I recently ran across a short post on Kaelee Bates, a blog run by a woman with previous experience with Christian Patriarchy. Here is an excerpt: "Different but Complimentary."I cannot shake how similar that phrase is to, "separate but equal"I have attempted to write on this subject numerous times, but the truth is I am still too angry and raw. I just want to scream at everyone, "THIS IS NOT EQUALITY!" ...There is no way for me to write about this subject and keep my anger out of … [Read more...]


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