Command v. Suggestion: “Wives, submit!” and “Husbands, love!”

spiritual abuse2

Any Christian Patriarchy advocate reading my post yesterday would surely have been shaking his or her head and saying “but it’s all about servant leadership, not a dictatorship!” or “women may be commanded to submit to their husbands, but God also commands men to love their wives!” These are the two go-to excuses made by defenders [...]

Christian Patriarchy to Men: You don’t have to grow up!

spoiled

What are the qualities we generally associate with maturity? The ability to see things from others’ perspectives? The ability to accept that the world doesn’t revolve around you, and that things don’t always go the way you want them to, and that you just have to deal with that? The ability to cooperate with others, to [...]

Oh, for heaven’s sake!

tantrum

Doug Wilson’s daughters have joined in the fray, defending their father against the recent outcry of the blogosphere (see my last post for more on that). I just read their defenses, and I just can’t even. I’m sitting here bone tired from a day of blogging and dissertation writing and baby watching, and there’s no [...]

Marital Rape? Doug Wilson on Dominance and Submission in the Marriage Bed

marriage bed

*Trigger warning for survivors of sexual or domestic violence* The blogosphere I follow has lit up in horror over the last day or so in reaction to a blog post which makes a connection between the prevalence of rape in our society and sex as practiced in the marriage bed today, and, some have argued, responds by endorsing [...]

Raised Quiverfull: Skarlet’s Story

Skarlet

“My parents were both christians before they got married, but after five years of attending a church which taught that they should not have any children at all, so that they could better witness to the lost (based on their interpretation of verses like “he who has a wife should be as though he has none..), my parents reacted against that teaching and felt that children are a gift from God. From that point on, they did not ever use birth control.”

Vision Forum views food as a HUGE THEOLOGICAL ISSUE

Vision Forum has just put out a Petition for Prayer: This week Vision Forum Ministries will endeavor to do something we think timely and significant. We recognize that the mission before us is both dangerous and risky. Once more we walk into the breach of controversy, this time by addressing a very difficult subject fraught [...]

Worthwhile Reads: Patriarchy is all the same

Patriarchal marriage and “responsibility” on A Sober Second Look But most of the interpretations of the Qur’an and of Islamic law that we encountered when we first converted did not (and would never have) used the word “patriarchal” to describe their vision of the “ideal” Muslim marriage. Nor did they put much stress on the duty [...]

Raised Quiverfull: Tricia’s Story

Tricia

“At the first homeschool convention my parents attended, they heard one of the “big names” in the movement speak and were dazzled. They actively pursued more of the same kind, and Doug Philips, Jonathan Lindvall, Bill Gothard, and Michael Pearl all soon became household words in our family. There were several other less well-known teachers in the same general stream that we followed as well. We subscribed to the magazines/newsletters, bought the books and tapes, went to the seminars, etc. Our home was literally littered with patriarchal propaganda.”

Raised Quiverfull: Sierra’s Story

Sierra

“I was not born into fundamentalism. My mother was an ordinary evangelical and my extended family was made up of lapsed Catholics. We went to various non-denominational Bible churches as my mother searched for her spiritual home. When I was 7, my mother had a miscarriage. She fell deep into mourning and leaned on one of her homeschool friends for support. That friend was a fundamentalist. We were rapidly sucked down the rabbit hole of Christian patriarchy and quiverfull as my mother began attending a church that followed the charismatic fundamentalist preacher William Branham.”

Raised Quiverfull: Sarah’s Story

Sarah

“My parents were already slipping into PF/QF teachings by the time I was born. They both came from chaotic backgrounds and were looking for a way to ensure that their children would never experience the things they had to go through. My older sisters had to watch things go from normal to terrible, but I have no memories from before. My earliest memories involve skirts and braids and spanking spoons. We had every book and magazine ever published by Vision Forum, Michael Pearl, Debbi Pearl, David Wilkerson, Above Rubies, Answers in Genesis, The Harris’s, The Farris’s, and the Botkins. I’m sure there were more.”

Raised Quiverfull: Melissa’s Story

Melissa

“When I was 5 my parents decided to homeschool me. At around age 8 some things started to change, my dad told us that all the girls would have to dress modestly from now on, because it wouldn’t be fair for him to “spring that on us when we hit our teens” and we might as well get used to it now. When I was 10 we quit going to church and began “homechurching”. I remember my dad subscribed to “Patriarch Magazine” and “Quit You Like Men” magazines. My mother started to get “Gentle Spirit” and eventually “Above Rubies.””

Raised Quiverfull: Mattie’s Story

Mattie

“My parents consider themselves to be first-generation Christians. They were heavily influenced by Mary Pride during their engagement, and always planned to homeschool and have their children court, rather than date. They were involved in both Vineyard and Sovereign Grace Ministries churches, and subscribed to WORLD Magazine and Above Rubies (and later I would be subscribed to The King’s Daughter Magazine). For school, we used Sonlight Curriculum, Rod & Staff, Beautiful Feet, Gileskirk, Apologia Science, and Alpha Omega LifePacs, and we were involved in AWANA.”