The Tomboy in Skirts

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My six-year-old daughter Sally wears dresses, well, basically, all the time. If she's not wearing dresses, she's wearing skirts. I can't think of the last time I saw her in shorts, and she swore off pants last year. Too uncomfortable, she said. When it's cold, she wears leggings under her dresses. Dresses, dresses, always dresses.  This is weird to me. I grew up in a conservative evangelical homeschool culture that valued female domesticity. When I was 13, I swore off pants. I believed women … [Read more...]

Do Male Voices Have a Place in the Abortion Debate?

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I recently received this email: Hi, Libby Anne.I've corresponded with you before when I identified as pro-life. I've since changed my views on the abortion issue as well as a plethora of other women's issues, and I think your contributions from your blog played a major contribution.The reason I'm emailing you today is because I have a question that I haven't seen addressed very well by websites.Some context: I was in a Facebook group when I became engaged in a conversation about … [Read more...]

Patriarchy and the Gender of God

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I recently came upon an interesting blog post by Sarah Moon of the progressive Christian channel on Patheos. In it Sarah pushed back against a blog post in which Roger Olson of the evangelical channel on Patheos argued against calling God "mother." While I'm no longer religious myself, I was struck by the role gender constructs played in Roger's post.Roger starts by noting the following: Some Christians struggle with calling God “Father” for three reasons. First, some say addressing God as F … [Read more...]

Gamergate Comes Home

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I am not and never have been a gamer. My interest in various fandoms (I'm a Whovian) and my friendship with progressive feminist women who do identify as gamers has given me a window into the community, but it has always been as an outsider looking in. As I've followed Gamergate and various controversies over sex and gender in video games and in the wider cosplay community, it has always been with a certain feeling of detachment.And now, here I am.My six-year-old daughter hangs with the … [Read more...]

Steve Is a Man: On Minecraft and Gender

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Like just about every American child between the ages five and fifteen, my daughter Sally is a huge Minecraft aficionado. As I've watched her play, I've found myself bothered by gender issues that should be easy to fix but instead seem ubiquitous in our world today.The default Minecraft character is a man named Steve. Mojang recently added a default female-looking character (Alex), but it took them five years to do so. Five years. And even today, the pocket edition of Minecraft---the one pl … [Read more...]

How We Disagree

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In a conversation on an earlier post about my comment policy, one reader said this: I think a huge reason for the anger that you can encounter here is that this place is pretty united by going against beliefs that cause harm. So when there's someone who doesn't agree, people get mad because their beliefs are harming others, so fuck them! They're clearly a horrible person, so we don't give a fuck how we treat them!But I used to believe a lot of those things, and while they were horrible … [Read more...]

Why Does Lily Work Two Jobs while Carl is Unemployed?

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I recently read a 2014 article titled For white working-class women, it makes sense to stay single mothers. I found the article fascinating. The authors, both law professors, focus on the story of Lily, a working-class woman who became pregnant and subsequently broke up with her boyfriend, Carl. As they explain, Lily was employed while Carl was not, and Lily found Carl a drain on her finances---a liability she could not afford while raising a child. As she puts it: “I can support myself. I al … [Read more...]


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