“But you look so young!”

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"You have two children?" my colleague exclaimed, "But you look so young!" By the standards of my left-leaning town, I am a very young mother. As a result, I get this sort of thing a lot. Usually I try to explain about how yes, I am a young mother, but I had unusual circumstances, or that it was a good thing because it meant I wouldn't go on the job market with pregnancy and babies still ahead of me when I finish my graduate degree. This time, though, I decided to try something … [Read more...]

And Then She Called Me “Libby”

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Over the holidays my preschool age daughter Sally started calling me Libby. For a couple of days, it was all she used to address me. "Libby, can you get me a drink of milk?" "Libby, can I have a snack?" "Libby, is it okay if I go play in the basement?" I think I can now understand why some parents go by their first names with their children. There is definitely something leveling about it.Sally has long occasionally called Sean and I by our first names. For instance, I'd say "Sally, could … [Read more...]

When Homeschool Parents Call Other Parents “Selfish”

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I was raised in the homeschool movement. I grew up on its ideas and its rhetoric. And yet, I send Bobby to daycare and Sally to preschool and will be sending both to public school when they are old enough. This runs smack up against the ideals of good parenting I was raised with, and in the eyes of some homeschool parents, it de facto makes me selfish. I was reminded of this by a facebook comment by a homeschool parent I noticed in the discussion of Virginia's HJ 92.I highlight this co … [Read more...]

No, Explanations Are NOT a Problem

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I have to admit, I rarely come upon things that do this much of a dance on my blood pressure. But this . . . wow. It's an article from Shepherd Press, reposted by conservative Christian actor Kirk Cameron on his blog. It is called "The Problem with Explanations." Throughout this piece, I'm going to assume that Kirk Cameron posted it on his blog because he agrees with it. Let's take a look, shall we? God has not called parents to explain but to train. Explanations often lead to frustration and … [Read more...]

Little Bundles of Sin? I Think Not.

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"My legs are tired mommy, my legs are tired!" Sally was insistent."We're almost home, honey, you can make it," I assured her. Bobby was in the stroller, and as he is just moving from babyhood to toddlerhood I wasn't going to make him walk."No I can't! My legs are going to fall asleep!" Sally was again insistent."Come on honey, I know you can do it," I said. "Just a little farther!"And at that moment, Bobby climbed out of the stroller, looked at his sister, and pointed back at the … [Read more...]

Raising Little Terrorists: Threats and Ultimatums Gone Wrong

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"Mommy, stop your typing right now, or I'll color on the table with this marker.""Sally!" I burst out, "I will not let you threaten me like that!"And then I had a sudden realization and my annoyance evaporated. Sally, age four, had been issuing ultimatums like this with increasing frequency over the previous week, but it was only at this moment that I put two and two together and figured out where this was coming from. Sally had learned to issue threats to get her way from me. Stop … [Read more...]

Parenthood, Selfishness, and Toxic Ideas

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I recently overheard some relatives of my husband say that not having children was a selfish choice, and that it was the choice to bear and raise children that was truly selfless. I cringed, but I was not involved in the conversation, so I didn't say anything. It did make me think, though, and I was reminded of a blog post I had come upon several days before with a very different message. It was titled "To the Women Who Choose Not To Have Kids."   To the women who choose not to have kids, I hav … [Read more...]


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