Temper tantrums, life, and calming down


Last week I took Sally to the park. When we pulled in, she completely freaked out. She started crying and yelling.No! Not here! Go back out, mommy!I responded as I normally do.Sally, it's okay, calm down. Tell mommy what's wrong. ... Honey, just take a deep breath, calm down, and use your words. ... Sally, I'm trying to listen to you, but I can't understand what you want while you're crying.This went back and forth for a minute or two, with her crying and me trying to figure out … [Read more...]

Sarah’s Spanking Project

Sarah at Who I Am Without You is doing a project on spanking. This week I got a bright idea. I want to compile a collection of stories from victims of spanking. I want young parents to be able to see the issue from words that could someday belong to their child. People who want to participate can write a short post, about 100-300 words in regards to the issue of spanking, and I will post them one at a time into an album on my blog. She offers a number of different formats: … [Read more...]

“Post-Fundamentalist Motherhood”

mother and baby

Latebloomer recently wrote an excellent post called "Post-Fundamentalist Motherhood." I've often had readers tell me that they read my posts and feel like I'm reading their minds. In this case, I felt the same when reading Latebloomer's post - she was articulating my thoughts almost exactly. I'm going to quote from her article and add some additional commentary. Latebloomer begins as follows: When I look at my little toddler, I am so glad that I am no longer a fundamentalist Christian. She … [Read more...]

Worthwhile Reads: Making up with your child

You remember when I talked recently about positive parenting and saying "I'm sorry?" Well, I recently came upon an excellent article on the same topic: "Eleven Steps for Healing and Restoring the Peace after Being Harsh with Your Child." Here are the eleven steps (be sure to read the full article!):Calm yourselfAccept your mistakeDon't make excusesReflect on your triggersWork on self regulationReleaseGratitude listRe-Connect and ComfortPromise to do … [Read more...]

Teaching Children about God: How to Get Started?

A couple of months ago I wrote a post called "Are You Teaching Her about Jesus?" I wrote about how a relative had put this question to me in a letter, clearly concerned about my daughter Sally's spiritual well-being. And I wrote about how I'm still not sure how to respond to such questions given that we're not "out" as atheists to our relatives at this point. One of my readers left this comment: There is teaching “about” and there is teaching “to blindly believe in”. You can probably truthfully … [Read more...]

Crunchy Moms and My Desire to Belong

baby in wrap

A few weeks ago I linked to a blog post about circumcision on a website called Authentic Parenting. A reader emailed me, wondering if I knew that Authentic Parenting also promotes anti-vaccine links and misinformation, and asking if I meant to endorse the site itself. I replied that I did not realize that and that I am not anti-vaccinations and I added a disclaimer to my post. And then I remembered that I actually have a link to the Authentic Parenting website on my Positive Parenting Resources … [Read more...]

Free Range Parenting: The Stares of the Neighbors


In addition to positive parenting, I'm also a big fan of free range parenting. The idea is that parents do too much "helicopter parenting" today, and that children are actually capable of much more than we think, capable of things like (gasp!) walking themselves to school. For me, free range parenting means preparing Sally to handle life rather than simply protecting her from it.But there has always been one serious difficulty for me about free range parenting, one thing that has held me … [Read more...]