“Such! A! Flirt!”


This comment by reader onamission5 was left on "What's Your Favorite Princess?"At kindergarten orientation for one of my kids several years ago, one of the moms there, every time her son would so much as look at or try to speak to any female person young or old, would loudly exclaim for everyone to Look At What A Flirt he was and How Much He Likes Girls. It made the child obviously uncomfortable. It made everyone in the room obviously uncomfortable! He seemed more to me like a shy boy … [Read more...]

The Problems with Spanking a la Dobson

child crying

The word "spanking" is used in so many different ways. Some use it to mean slapping a toddler's bottom or thigh for misbehavior in the moment, others use it to mean sending a child to their room for a paddling, and some use it to encompass essentially any physical violence. My parents practiced a sort of "ritualized spanking" a la Michael Pearl and James Dobson. Despite my parents' best intentions---and their care in following the rules laid out by these teachers---my experience was profoundly n … [Read more...]

The Lesbian Duplex 8: An Open Thread


This space is for conversation between commenters.* If you have a link or article or interesting thought that’s not relevant to an ongoing thread, you can share it here. If a conversation on another post has turned entirely off topic, you can bring it here. And so on. Every so often, as the number of comments on a given Lesbian Duplex post becomes unmanageable, I put up a fresh post. For those who are interested, I also try to have regular open posts specifically on children and parenting is … [Read more...]

Reza Aslan and Bill Maher on Islam


In light of recent conversations on atheism, Islam, and progressive religion in general, I thought I'd share a video I came upon today. In it, Reza Aslan, an Iranian-American writer and scholar of religions, responds to comedian Bill Maher's recent claims about Islam. I really appreciated this video, as it expresses a lot of the concerns I've had regarding the way Americans view and portray Islam.I'll give a short summary for those who don't want to watch the video. Reza Aslan points out … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Playing Telephone with God


Created To Be His Help Meet, pp. 282Today we will cover a letter. Debi doesn't respond to it directly, using it as a stepping stone to more discussion of being a soul mate, but it's worth looking at for itself. Dear Debi,I found your website! What a blessing. I have learned so much from the submissive-wife-type comments. I am learning about being a submissive wife, and it is amazing to see my husband absolutely bloom before my eyes. Relationships and personalities are so varied. I'm … [Read more...]

Introduce Yourself!


When I first started blogging, I never imagined I would end up creating a community. Most of my readers likely don't read the comments, but those who do read and engage here have created something beyond the blog itself. My comment sections have become a place of conversation and bonding, advice giving and camaraderie. If you're a regular here, or even if you're just a lurker, hop in and introduce yourself!And while you're at it, welcome our new mods, Petticoat Philosopher and AAAtheist! … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: What “Companionship” Means in Pearl World


Created To Be His Help Meet, pp. 279-80This passage is an interesting one---or at least, I found it so. Part of me wanted to like it, because Debi is talking about the importance of spouses being soul mates. But it seems our definition of "soul mates" differs, because what she describes is profoundly one-sided.She begins with a letter: When Two Become OneDear Friends in Christ,I am a minister. I recently listened to a tape a pastor recorded about a woman learning to honor and … [Read more...]