“Those are for Boys!” and Other Stories

Hugging

Two days ago I wrote about gender and confirmation bias and some of my own experiences as I raise my two young children, one girl and one boy. There's a lot I didn't write and there will be more posts on this topic to come, but I wanted to take a moment to highlight a few of the comments on that post, as many of my readers weighed in with their own experiences, either as children themselves or raising children today. Feel free to add more of your own stories in the … [Read more...]

Bobby’s Trains and Confirmation Bias

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Bobby's face was pressed against the glass surrounding the electric train set. The trains were running, whistling, and crossing each other's paths. It was his favorite part of the children's museum. Even at only one year of age, children have interests and show preferences, and one of Bobby's definite interests is trains.Just then, my husband Sean's Uncle Dale walked over and smiled at Bobby. "Look at him!" he said. "He's obsessed with that train. He's such a boy!" I frowned. I hate it when t … [Read more...]

They called it “adultery” and made her confess

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I have been reading about child sexual abuse perpetrated in the 1980s by Donn Ketcham, a missionary doctor in Bangladesh. The abuse came to light when one of his victims, a 14-year-old missionary kid, returned to the United States to visit relatives. While there, she told the pastor of her home church about her abuse. Her pastor interrogated her to ensure that she was being truthful and then handed her over to Russ Lloyd and Russ Ebersole, the first a Christian counselor and the second Donn … [Read more...]

“They said if you report it, you hurt the body of Christ”

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You may have heard that Bob Jones University has fired GRACE (Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment). Everyone is wondering why, but it's not hard to guess. GRACE was due to release its report on Bob Jones University's handling of sex abuse and rape next month. This incident is just one more in a burgeoning series of evangelical sex and abuse scandals. GRACE was founded by Boz Tchividjian, who is a grandson of Billy Graham and a professor at Liberty University. With these … [Read more...]

Sally and Me

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As I watched Sally at her preschool's winter program recently, something struck me in the gut, hard. Sally's upbringing will be so different from mine that it will in some ways be like we are from different cultures. I have talked before about growing up in the Christian homeschooling subculture being like being raised as a "third culture kid." I've talked about how our parents, raised in normal mainstream homes, could not understand the experience of growing up like we did, out of sync and in a … [Read more...]

Live Every Moment

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Do you know what has been most surprising to me of all about adulthood? How fast time moves. For example, today is Christmas, and I don't remember once having that "oh my goodness I can't wait Christmas is taking forever to come" feeling. No, I only had the "what wait is Christmas really that soon I'm not ready for it yet" feeling. Sally, of course, felt differently, as I did at her age.I've realized more and more that every day I live is a day I will never get back. Every evening is an … [Read more...]

Sally, Sean’s Wallet, and Moral Ethics

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When we go grocery shopping, I generally let Sally choose something small for herself. On a recent trip, Sally made a choice that was more expensive than the price range I generally ask her to stick to. I could have had her put it back, but I could see she was entranced, so instead I put back the little marshmallows for hot chocolate and a few other things."Sally, since you wanted that little doll, I had to put some things back," I told her in the car. "So we didn't get the little … [Read more...]


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