Dating Is Dead: Long Live Whatever-We-Call-It-Now!


I recently came upon a post by Marshall Segal on John Piper's blog. It began:Dating is dead. So says the media. Girls, stop expecting guys to make any formal attempt at winning your affections. Don’t sit around waiting for a boy to make you a priority, communicate his intentions, or even call you on the phone. Exclusivity and intentionality are ancient rituals, things of the past, and misplaced hopes. I beg to differ. It’s not that this new line of thinking is necessarily untrue today, or t … [Read more...]

Should Parents Be “Involved” in Their Children’s Love Lives?


Blogger That Mom recently began a series on courtship. I don't know where she will take the subject as she goes on through the series, but I did want to touch on the premise she begins with---that parents need to be involved. The Necessary ParentWhen we attended Bill Gothard’s IBLP Basic Seminar back in the mid-80s, one of the topics he covered was dating. This was before he had moved into his courtship teachings and even before anyone we knew of had started discussing things like courtship … [Read more...]

Courtship, Hand-Holding, Parody, and Me


I recently came upon an article titled "The Christian dating site for those saving hand-holding for marriage." When I saw the title, I thought it was real, because saving hand-holding for marriage doesn't actually seem foreign or that far out to me.The article, which is actually parody, centered around this video:The Duggar girls are saving hand-holding for engagement. The Duggar family has already spoken about its dating and courtship standards on the TV show. In a TLC interview a … [Read more...]

Things Women Hear in the Church


I ran across two different articles today, each of which would have probably seemed only more appalling to me if they weren't simply parroting things I heard growing up as a conservative evangelical.The first was called True Love Doesn't Wait, written by a married father of six. The basic premise? Church singles need to stop waiting for true love and just get married already. The author responds to a blog post made popular in the fury of Christian blogging on purity that followed a post on … [Read more...]

Do Joshua Harris’s Books Contain “Valuable Advice”?

boy meets girl 2

Several weeks ago I had a twitter exchange with fellow blogger Dianna Anderson:After this exchange, Jessica of Faith Permeating Life, a blogger who defines herself as a Christian feminist, took issue with Dianna and my statements. She responded with a post called  "What I Learned from Joshua Harris" in which she argued that Harris' books taught her many valuable things, and stated that she continues to recommend them to Christian couples. In this blog post I'm going to respond to J … [Read more...]