The Purity Culture’s Guinea Pigs: Its Daughters

A reader named Carol left the following comment on one of my posts regarding purity balls, purity rings, and the like: These moms and dads obviously were not raised this way, did not start believing in this claptrap until they had daughters, they have absolutely zero proof that staying pure, I mean, not even holding hands? until marriage ensures a successful marriage. I won’t even say happy because that seems beside the point. And apparently, their marriages are successful anyhow, in spite of … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Stay at Home Daughters

college2

In what ways were boys and girls in your family raised differently vocationally (i.e., the boys pushed toward careers and the girls pushed toward homemaking)? How did this play out as you came of age (apprenticeship, college, staying home, etc.)? Joe: The girls were not allowed to go to college.  Not until they escaped from the prison anyway.  Also, for years, Mama hated the idea of college due to Bill Gothard's ignorance, and forbade any of the boys to plan their secondary education.  But, … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Junior Mother

little mother

If you were an older daughter, do you feel that you were expected to play “mother” for your younger siblings? Explain. Joe: I wasn't the older daughter but I can explain about my eldest sister. She was not expected to play the mother and not even expected to be responsible if anything happened to any of her younger siblings.  Every one of us had the responsibility to be obedient and worshipful of Mama at every minute of every day.  My sister did take on the responsibility of being the … [Read more...]

Raised Quiverfull: Siblings and Responsibilities

gender chores

How many siblings did you grow up with? Did responsibilities in your family differ by gender, with the girls having certain chores and the boys having others? Explain. Joe: My Mama was a very unique woman.  I'll explain in a bit.  But first, I was the dead middle child of seven siblings.  The oldest was a girl, then twin boys, then me, then two more girls, and finally, the baby of the family, a boy.  If you're familiar with any movies or television shows, you might see that it is regularly … [Read more...]

Worthwhile Reads: Older Quiverfull Daughters and Parenting

Quiverfull ideology states that older daughters learn the skills they will need to be a mother by practicing on their younger siblings. By essentially "raising" a handful of children while in high school, older quiverfull daughters prepare themselves for their own roles as mothers. A growing number of articles by women who grew up as older daughters in quiverfull families is challenging this idea. Preparing for Marriage and Kids, by Lisa The Fun Mom, by Melissa Diapers, Crowd Control, … [Read more...]

Worthwhile Reads: Emotional Incest

Inspired by my series on emotional incest a few weeks ago, Sierra of The Phoenix and the Olive Branch recently wrote three posts on the topic herself. By the way, I can't praise Sierra and her writing enough. I really can't. If you haven't perused her blog yourself, you should. Start with the three posts I just mentioned: Emotional Incest: The Junior Wife Emotional Incest: The Mama's Boy and the Other Wife Emotional Incest: The Bottom Line … [Read more...]

Emotional Incest, Part 4: The Pain

In Part 1 I discussed the definition of emotional incest, in Part 2 I discussed its relationship with the stay-at-home daughter dynamic of the Christian Patriarchy movement, and in Part 3 I discussed other ways emotional incest can occur as well. I am now going to turn to the problems and pain emotional incest causes. Emotional incest causes a multitude of problems, but I'm only going to address the three I see as most significant: first, it creates a relationship triangle between the parents … [Read more...]


CLOSE | X

HIDE | X