CTBHHM: Michael and Debi Pearl’s Whirlwind Romance

Michael and Debi Pearl

Created to Be His Help Meet, pp. 13-15 Once upon a time there was a silly young girl who grew up to learn what it means to be a help meet - God's secret for a heavenly marriage. I start this book with the words "Once upon a time" because it really is a wonderful story come true. It should, and could, be your story too. It is God's gift to every woman. This is how Debi begins her introduction to her book, Created to Be His Help Meet. I'm sure a literature major could write yards about the way sh … [Read more...]

CTBHHM: Michael Pearl’s Stamp of Approval

approved

Created to Be His Help Meet, pp. 13Created to Be His Help Meet, a popular evangelical/fundamentalist marriage manual, begins with a one page introduction by author Debi Pearl's husband, Michael Pearl. This is important, because it signals that Michael approved of his wife's writing a book. In evangelical and fundamentalist circles, whether they embrace "complementarianism" or actually use the word "patriarchy," women aren't supposed to write books, etc., without their husband's "blessing." … [Read more...]

Shall I review Created to Be His Helpmeet?

Created

Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious, that extremely patriarchal marriage manual I have mentioned before, was published by Debi Pearl in 2004. Michael Pearl and his wife Debi run No Greater Joy ministries and are the authors of To Train Up A Child, that extreme discipline manual that advocates spanking infants as young as six months and spanking toddlers until they are "utterly defeated." Here is the descriptive summary of Created to Be His Help Meet f … [Read more...]

From “Legal” Coverture to “Visionary” Coverture

law of coverture

You remember that piece I wrote a while ago about a World Magazine writer explaining why she changed her name when getting married? Well, her husband has commented on that piece arguing that I misunderstood what was said in the essay, so I made added a correction to the end of my post. But doing so made me think again about the whole name changing thing - and about why it was seen as completely natural, obvious, and mandatory in the conservative evangelical community in which I was raised. And … [Read more...]

The Purity Culture and Sex as a “Duty”

woman serve man

The teachings of the purity culture led me to believe that I owed my husband sex, that it was his due, and that if I didn't give him sex, well, he would look elsewhere and I would be at least partially to blame. I was taught that men (unlike women) needed sex about three times a week in order to be fulfilled, and that it was my job - my duty - as his wife to do this for my husband. Or else he might, you know, cheat.To give you an example of the messages I got about this growing up, let me off … [Read more...]

Debi Pearl is not very nice

Debi Pearl

My regular readers will know that I am not a fan of the Pearls. Michael and Debi Pearl run No Greater Joy ministries and are best known for their child rearing manual, To Train Up A Child, but have also written numerous other books including extremely patriarchal marriage advice literature. One thing that has struck me more and more lately is how very not nice Debi Pearl is in so much of her writing. Here is an excerpt, for example, from an article she wrote recently called Rats: I went down … [Read more...]

Men and Women in Christian Patriarchy: Masters and Slaves or Equals?

My parents always taught me that men and women were equal. Indeed, I was never made to feel inferior for being a woman. My parents taught me that men and women were different and had different roles to play, but that men and women and their roles were also equal and of equal worth. The male role is to provide for his family and protect them, to engage in politics and spiritual warfare, to have a career and make the decisions for his family. The female role is to keep the house and home, raise … [Read more...]


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